Getting Out of My Head: Food Edition

Mac And Cheese: Not Just Kids' Stuff

2011-09-26T17:44:00.001-04:00

Going into work at 5am calls for a quickish meal the night before. Usually leftovers but always quick. But always delicious.
After some shuffling around the freezer last night, I finally decided on Mac and cheese with broccoli and maple bacon tossed in. I know, I know. I have a problem with maple bacon. You could say I have issues when it comes to maple bacon fat.
This dinner is no different. For dinner tonight I combined many food loves: Maple bacon and broccoli..And bacon fat.

Instead of using butter for the powdered cheese sauce (along with an extra quarter cup shredded cheese) I used the bacon fat. It was probably about two tablespoons, which Matthew has just informed me is "A lot of bacon fat."
I gave him a blank look: "Problem?"
"I bet your heart loves you for that." He said
"That's love flowing through my veins!"

Okay, so honestly, not the most "healthy" meal I've made this month; the 1.5 cups of steamed diced broccoli barely constitutes a serving of vegetables each, and the extra cheese, powdered sauce and, ahem, bacon fat probably isn't going to do too much for my hips, but Matt and I have gotten it in our heads that we work on our feet constantly and I for one don't eat much at work. So the occasional bacon fat laced cheesy meal probably wont do as much damage as an office drone eating a burger and a Milky Way a day.
But I digress. Back to dinner.
The "Extra" bacon fat has yielded this incredible mouth feel. Smooth, tender, creamy meltingness. It's what makes fat so irresistible and perfect. A primal addiction for humans.
The steamed broccoli is leftover from last night's dinner, was diced tiny and speckeled and nestled in the pasta. The maple bacon adding another level of flavor while staying uninrusive in the background.

This is a fairly easy and adaptable meal to make. Any protein of veggie leftovers can easily be tossed in with boxed mac and cheese, as long as you add a little shredded cheese and a little extra milk. You'd also want to reheat it all just enough to take the chill off the food (as long as any meat is fully cooked already [obviously]) A good way to get kids to eat their veggies as well, I think. Especially those adverse to leftovers.

Pie Dough Meandering

2011-09-18T20:49:00.002-04:00

I don't get the deal with pie crust. So many chefs and people who think they are pastry chefs religiously bleat on and on about the importance of cold fat, ice cold water and the proper distribution of the two. My last boss so deliriously and furiously defended her pie dough that the only time we were allowed to touch the damn mixer was cleaning it when she was done making her dough. Although it wasn't hard to figure out her recipe. About ten pounds Crisco, 50 pounds of flour, about a gallon of ice water and 2/3rds cup salt. Opps! There goes the "~~secret~~" recipe. But it sounds like your rough 3-2-1 ratio to me. The 3-2-1 ratio being 3 parts flour, 2 parts fat and 1 part water. Cut the fat into the flour and mix the water into that and you got pie dough.

Last year I was making a chicken pot pie, and forgot to both chill the fat and ice the water. I was annoyed over the tough crust I could expect. But that never happened. My crust was just as flaky, just as perfect as ever. This had to be a flaky fluke. So I tried it again the next time I made pie with the same excellent results.

Tonight, I made pulled pork pot pie. The crust, though needing a bit more salt, was tender, flaky and browned very nicely. So what's the deal with pie dough? I barely even followed the 3-2-1 method. Everyone seems to make a big deal out of it. Secret recipes, methods guarded with pretentious greed. Is there some Pillsbury dough boy conspiracy going on?

During the hay day of Food Network, Alton Brown was a very popular man. He had all the answers and could present it with flair, humor and understanding. His pie crust episode was no different. He stressed the importance of adding ice water in slow stages, even going as far as using a spray bottle. I remember thinking that while the idea was brilliant for proper water distribution, it seemed like a lot of work for pie crust. A mere vessel for transporting filling into your mouth.

Turns out, all this fuss is not needed. As long as you coat the fat with enough flour and make it into a cornmeal consistency, allow time for the dough to rest and use minimal rolling, you're golden. The culprit is over rolling and over working the dough. This is true for any dough you make. A cool hand and a firm but gentle touch is what can make puffy pastry dough or a tender pizza crust.

But of course, that's just my opinion. I've learned how to make the painstaking, multi-step, multi-hour pastry dough at school and one that took about an hour at home with identical results. Is either method right or wrong? No. Is one more traditional and therefore more trusted than the other? Sure. I love tradition. I love experiencing the way things were done classically. I have a deep respect for the classics. But if I can save myself several hours taking principles of those traditional methods and yield the same results, I'm going to take it.

Which brings me back to pie crust. There are incredibly fussy ways to make it, with people swearing this is the only way to make it properly. I have people like my former boss, who was defensive over a "secret" recipe. There is no secret recipe for pie crust. It's a ratio. A ratio, people! This isn't Grandpa Jack's secret recipe for moonshine.

Anyway, long story short, you probably don't need to worry too much about perfectly chilled fat and icy cold water. Nice to have, might increase the quality vaguely. But really, don't worry so much about deep coldness. In my opinion, as long as things are reasonably cold and you don't overwork the dough, you're probably good to go. Just don't flake out.

It's pork pot pie! And it's happy to see you!

Onions and Mushrooms

2011-09-16T17:10:00.000-04:00

You know, I've never been a fan of mushrooms. For one, it's fungus. The word alone is unappealing. For another, the texture and mouth feel is weird and rubbery. It's almost as bad as biting into the gristle part of a steak. I know I'm eating a mushroom, and the word creeps into my head as I chew "Fungus...Fungus...Fungus!!!!"

But I've found when I chop them into a tiny dice and cook them with onions and red wine, they make an incredible (inexpensive) flavoring agent. Tonight I'm cooking burgers for dinner. You could just form the beef into patties and throw them into the pan, but why? Ground beef doesn't have to be boring. Ground beef isn't just the inexpensive dinner substance formed into the dry meatloaves of the 50's.

Burgers are usually my lazy go to dinner option. Or when I'm craving beef. But since I have leftover raw mushrooms and half an onion, I'm feeling like putting a little more effort into the burgers. Cooking the mushrooms and onions down in a little wine and Worcestershire adds moisture and a deeper beefy flavor to any kind of beef you pair them.

Onions and I are sort of like Gollum and The Ring. I hate what it does to me, but I love them. Slicing into just one onion is enough to make my eyes sting shut hours after we've cooked. They make me cry and I still keep crawling back to their caramelized love. One onion ring to rule them all. Please excuse the Lord of The Rings reference.

Mushrooms are starting to grow on me. Maybe someday I can cook them sliced thin and eat them without noticing their ~~horrible~~ unique texture. But for today I'm happy with my sauteed mushroom stuffed burgers. I really hope they come out well. They are a bit moister than I'd like, so I hope they don't fall apart when I cook them, but the egg yolk should provide enough of a binder.
Cheesy mushroom burgers and tator tots. I promise I usually make better dinners, but for a gal getting up (too) early for a weekend bake at work, it'll do deliciously for now.

2011-09-15T07:15:00.000-04:00

I can't believe I haven't written anything since June. But summer is kind of a boring time of year when it comes to food for me. Don't get me wrong, I like the food well enough. I like the warm summer nights eating at the beach. I like grilled veggies. I like the one lobster roll I eat a summer. If Matt and I could afford the Farmer's Market produce prices we'd frequent them, but honestly summer food doesn't interest me too much. I'm not really a multi-colored heirloom tomato kinda gal. I'm a Fall girl. I love Fall probably more than any other season.

It's New England's time to shine in Fall. You have the best apples ready to be picked. You have an arsenal of pumpkin products. The food gets heavier and richer. Crusty bread becomes a side dish to the wonderfully meaty beef stew.
Food seems to taste better in the cooler months. During the summer, I make our favorite foods less often because it's too hot to eat slow cooked beef. Roasted root vegetables just don't fit into the summer. It's difficult to plan the week's dinner menu when all you think about is the food you're going to make in a few months. I relished the cool rainy days when I could get away with something heavier.
To be honest, summer kind of bores me. I'm not a beach girl, it's too hot and humid to go for a long walk, and I work. I'd rather be home putting time into a good meal than laying on the sand.

But I feel like I'm going to miss out on the heavy food this year. I'm getting married in 247 days. With dress fittings and engagement photos a bride to be has little need for rich foods. But I haven't really felt like too much of a bride apart from when I found my dress anyway. But that's another post.

For now, I'm looking forward to cool days, cozy nights, explosions of colors and slow cooked, slow roasted fall food.

Edo's

2011-06-10T20:46:00.000-04:00

I haven't done a restaurant review in awhile, but tonight's dinner totally merits one.

I first went to Edo's almost three years ago. It was right next store to my job at that time, and my co-worker and I went to try it out. I was totally hooked by the good food and the reasonable lunch prices and took Matt the first chance I got.
We both completely fell in love with the place and have been going ever since. It's become our special date place. We never come here enough, but it's such a great place with such special food it might become overkill if we visited too often.

I'm really protective of Edo's and hesitant to suggest it to people. The owners are nice and keep the place spotless and the quality of everything is always above expectations. I'm protective because this isn't a quick bite. The servers are attentive, but un-intrusive. If you want to sit for two hours through their inclusive small bites of pickled items, dinner and dessert, they wont bother you or rush you. It's a little slow, but only because you want to have a real experience with your meal.

Anyway, back to tonight. I hadn't seen the owner since before I quit my job, so when we saw him, we cheerfully said hello to each other before we were seated. After we ordered dinner (Matt got something with sweet potato noodles, beef and vegetables...with a name I cannot remember at the moment and I got the Gob Dol with beef) we nibbled at the complimentary small bites they brought out, and drinking the miso soup.
Mr. Hung was came to our table and set down a plate of mysterious handrolls.
"Mr. Hung! What's this?" I exclaimed, surprised at the sudden arrival of food. He wouldn't tell us, but smiled and told us try it "Doesn't need soy sauce!" He promised, and left.

Clumsily, I picked up a roll with my chop sticks and looked at it. It smelled wonderful. Matt thought the middle had salmon, and figuring I tolerated salmon, it was worth a leap of faith. Besides, Mr. Hung has never steered us wrong, nor has sent over anything we didn't like. I popped the whole thing in my mouth and what I experienced could only be described as a food explosion. The top of the hand roll was laced with avocado and lightly sauced with a gingery/sesame glaze. The sushi rice was glutany and sticky (my favorite qualities in rice). The avocado was creamy. The middle was...crunchy...Surprisingly . It was crunchy and not at all salmony. It was shrimpy! It was shrimp tempura!

"Holy Goodness." I said, through a mouthful of endorphin inducing food deliciousness. "This is incredible." I had to laugh, it was so good. I set my chopsticks down and sat back. I needed a minute to let what I ate sink in. And I don't even like avocado.
I picked my chopsticks up again and began to use them to point at the hand rolls "We need to have these at the wedding. You want to have sushi, we got to have this, too!" I said, still quite in a daze of experiencing such a combination of sweet, creamy, sticky and crunch.
"We can't not finish this, it'd be rude not to." I said, ungracefully attempting to pick up another piece. I knew I wouldn't be able to finish my dinner of a sizzling hot stone bowl filled with meat, veggies, rice and egg. But this was such an explosion of flavors and mouth feels I couldn't stop.

Plus, it'd be rude to not finish. Had I known such a delicious world of things existed outside my favorite menu items, I'd gotten them years ago, A whole new world of options...I'm not a picky eater, but when you go somewhere infrequently and know that you can rely on something being perfect every time, you tend not to stray too often.

When dinner came, I was bubbling with excitement to tell the server to tell Mr. Hung how amazing the hand rolls were. She probably thought I was insane (or possibly tipsy; though I hadn't drunk anything); the Whitest Girl in Connecticut tripping over herself with excitement over their food.
My Gob Dol was sizzling hot, the raw egg cracked in the center cooking in about 25 seconds as the sever mixes it all together. You need to wait almost ten minutes to begin eating lest you burn your mouth. But the beef, cut so thin, is moist, tender and flavorful. The rice on the bottom of the bowl turning into crunchy bits of tasty brown. The veggies fresh and lightly cooked. The egg mixed thoroughly through your bowl. The steam emanates from the bowl and the sizzling lasts almost ten minutes. It's by far my favorite meal at Edo's. You can get Katzu anywhere, but Gob Dol is a special experience.

This place is terribly under rated. I've always had a relaxing and delicious experience and Matt and I linger long past any other restaurant would usually allow.

Anyway, you need to visit Edo's. Come for the Gob Dol, stay for the deep fried Red Bean ice cream.

Potato Skins

2011-04-22T19:20:00.001-04:00

Ever had potato skins at a chain restaurant? Growing up, my family would occasionally go to Bennigans; usually on New Year's Eve. I remember laughing over the name "Fuzzy Navel", eating burgers, Turkey O'Tooles and fudge brownie sundaes.

But mostly I remember potato skins. They were probably deep fried skins. Which was hidden by melty cheddar cheese, greasy bacon, chopped chives and cold sour cream. The whole thing was a greasy, cheesy oily mess. And they were addictive as eating whipped cream straight from the can.

My 9-year old self never knew potatoes had a better topping than ketchup. Who knew?!

I haven't enjoyed potato skins in so many years. Matt and I have about four slices of extra thick cut bacon in the fridge, along with a half pound block of cheddar cheese and sour cream. I don't need to tell you where this is going....

I know they wont be as good as what you could get in a chain restaurant circa 1994; there was a lot more leeway on assorted fats back then. I baked the potatoes and scooped them, and will just broil them later instead of deep frying the tasty skins. But the bacon will be greasy, the sour cream full fat and creamy and the cheese will be plentiful.

I'm saving the inside potatoes and the bacon fat for pierogies tomorrow.

Rendering the bacon fat is worth the slow effort. The bacon we picked was very lean, but it yielded a surprising amount of fat. It smells all bacony with a touch of smokey in here. I'm using extra sharp New York Cheddar, sliced slightly thick. It's going to melt beautifully draped over the chopped bacon.

Holy Goodness. I have missed potato skins. The middle of each potato skin was full of melted cheddar, slightly crisp and salty bacon and sour cream. Like a surprise party for your mouth.

Okay, okay, okay. Sure. You can totally make these "healthy" Some kind of vegetable combination instead of bacon, less or no cheese, light sour cream...But...uhh..why? I understand healthy eating is great and can be completely delicious. I know. But what's life without enjoying your meal?...But that's another post.

Every time I bit into a bacon loaded, cheese laden mouthful of potato, it was like an explosion of awesome. Some bits of the bacon were slightly fatty and soft, providing incredible flavor. Sour cream, cheese and bacon. Could there be a more flavorful trifecta on a potato?

These potato skins were such a great splurge. Incredibly easy and a filling meal for a Friday night.

If only I had a good beer to go with it.....

Mmmmm...rendered bacon fat......

Brinner!!

2011-04-19T17:51:00.001-04:00

Our menu of dinners has been varied the past few days. Delicious, but in need of special prep. I'm starting to want something simple and completely different.

Which brings me to the magic of Brinner.

Brinner, if you haven't heard of it, is one of those combinations of meals. There's Brunch (Breakfast for lunch or even lunch for breakfast) Linner (lunch for dinner; in my mind it's mainly soup and sandwiches) and Brinner. Breakfast for dinner. I'm sure there's a dinner for breakfast (Dreakfast?) combination but 75% of my breakfast meals over my lifetime has been leftovers from dinner or non-breakfast food items (ranging from Pastina to burgers).

Brinner is admittedly a lazy meal. You really don't need to go to the store. Crack a few eggs, pull out the bisquik and fry up some bacon. You can throw together a frittata with whatever you cooked the night before. And who (besides me) doesn't like a short stack for dinner sometimes?

It is the quick and easy dinner. Clean-up is a snap and everyone's happy.

I'm making Brinner tonight because I'm in the mood for a change. I'm also dying for bacon. We usually try to keep it in the fridge, but while I was job hunting I'd rather spend 5 bucks on a 5 pound chicken than 16 slices of cured pork. At work I'll have a cream cheese bagel with bacon, but I'm yearning for my Maple Bacon. Maple bacon is one of the tastiest things I will ever eat at breakfast time....but that's another post.

We got this extra thick cut applewood smoked bacon. A little drizzle of maple syrup and brown sugar and you have created something so palette pleasing and sweet and the sweet bacon fat is just so........I'm losing track here. Bacon is mighty distracting.

Anyway, I don't really like categorizing meals into their own little boxes. I love a burger for breakfast as much as I do for dinner. I can put away an egg/sausage/cheese bagel for dinner or lunch. At work, I don't blink an eye if someone asks for Diet Coke at 8:30 in the morning. Hell, when I went into work during my externship at 4 am I'd start my shift off with some Diet Coke!

Don't go all cannibal on me, but meals are a lot like people. We shouldn't put them into these boxes and expect them to conform to what we think they should be. Why can't you have pancakes at 8pm? Why can't you have a chilli dog in the morning? Brinner, Brunch, Linner, Dreakfast, Dunch (?), why label? If you want to eat it my friend, don't let us judge you! If you order a turkey club at the diner at 7 am, I'll feel less embarrassed when I order my pattie melt, deal?

Shortcakes

2011-04-17T20:52:00.000-04:00

This is probably my main motivation when making risotto. Yes, it is creamy and parmy and full of starchy goodness, but risotto cakes are where it's at.

Soft. Crispy. Moist. Compressed cakes of indulgence.

But that's not the cakes I'm writing about. I came across incredible looking strawberries today for a price that felt a little like stealing. Strawberries! They actually look deep red, ripe, plump and delcious!
I bought two packages for shortcakes for dessert.We had left over heavy cream from last night. It was such a beautiful sunny day, so it just felt like a shortcake night.

I used the raw sugar for the shortcakes, and sprinkled some on top to create a sweet sugary crunch.

The whipped cream was more or less an afterthought. I wasn't really planning on it, but Matt insisted.....I am so glad he did! I haven't had good whipped cream in months. Months and months. Before I quit my job. Their whipped cream was always over whipped and under flavored.

I took a spoonful to check the sweetness factor and was hijacked into airy heaven. It was perfect. Medium peaked, smooth, airy and creamy. A whole different kind of creamy than risotto. I couldn't have made it go better with the strawberries and shortcake; the medium peaks eased seamlessly into the fruit. It didn't just sit there like a dead bird. Ever had too whipped cream? It really ruins a great dessert.

I've missed fresh whipped cream! And strawberries. The strawberries were ripe and sugared just enough to bring out the flavor of the fruit without overwhelming it with sugary sweetness. It went really well with the shortcakes; the sweet crunch was every few bites, so it was an extra burst of sweet sugary flavor.

What a fabulous kick off into warmer days. If I wasn't so full from such a great meal and dessert I'd go back for more.

Risotto.

2011-04-16T20:06:00.002-04:00

Cheesy creamy short grain rice. If I were to have an "issue" with food, it would be Risotto. I love it more than tuna and Doritos, more than beef stew. More than fresh marshmallows.

Risotto is a bowl of creamy Parmesany haven. It is a labor of love, needing care and patience, just the right amount of liquid and stirring. Stir too much, and you have a starchy mess, stir too little and you have a bowl of rice. Just the right amount of stirring and you are left with an evenly cooked, tender and creamy bowl of Risotto.

Basic risotto just has the main ingredients of cream, parm and white wine. Classic but stylish.
Risotto lends itself to any savory addition. vegetables, salmon, sausage, chicken, bacon. But I think bacon would be such an incredible indulgence with the risotto my tongue would surely die a thousand blissful deaths. It's a one dish meal. But it's not so much "healthy" or "quick" but you will soon find the end result is worth all that stirring and time.

But there's so much more to this dish. Leftover Risotto turns into cakes of pan fried, crispy on the outside soft on the inside risotto cakes. And those, my friend, are worth making risotto just to have the crispy cakes.Which are worth a post all by themselves. Risotto. Pan fried. There is no need for further explanation.

Risotto is a special meal for Matthew and I, partly due to the work involved and partly due to the amounts of rich ingredients. We made it for New Year's Eve 2010...Or what I refer to as my "Emancipation and leaping into a brighter future." So the dish is now a little more special. My freedom meal. That creamy mouth feel? That's my bright future, baby!

Anyway...If you've never had risotto, I cannot imagine why you haven't! It's like a high ten from the classic great chefs.

Over Efforting the Pizza

2011-04-13T18:36:00.000-04:00

At my new job, I work 4-9 hours a day 6 days a week. So on my day off, I like to do as much as I can with my time. After going to the gym yesterday, I had to figure out dinner. Pizza would be quick and easy, but I was bored with the usual veggie/sausage. I wanted something different and a little sweeter.

Which made me think of BBQ chicken pizza.

I had been roasting chicken thighs at under 300 degree heat for about 3 hours, and added a thrown together BBQ sauce in about an hour ago. It turned into a thick, sweet, bbq saturated mass of delciousness. Matt told me that 45 minutes at 350 with the size of the thighs would have more than sufficed, but when did I ever do anything the easy way? I was home, reading and studying Bruegger's material, and had time to kill. What trouble was it to let chicken slow cook?

I suffered horribly as I caramelized two onions. But the end justified the means. The caramelized onions were worth the eye squinting watery pain when I spread it across my tomato sauce sweetened with what was left of the bbq sauce.

You know what? I really miss good parm. When I go to any grocery store I always pause in the cheese section, pick up a hunka hunka aged Parmesan and inhale. The fruity and nutty notes of incredible hard cheese makes me want to spend the 15.99 a pound pricetag.The real stuff goes so well sprinkled lightly on top of pizza. But for now, I just have the mozzarella and provolone.

The pizza came out really well, I bought a jar of yeast at the store and feed it with honey and a little molasses for a change of pace, so the dough has a darker tinge to it, but is still chewy and tender. Using chicken thighs really gave the pizza a deeper chicken flavor and the condensed flavors of the bbq sauce enhanced the pizza overall.
It was a really nice change to our usual pizza night. Can't wait to make it again! Maybe next time I'll do an Alfredo like sauce or even just a sauceless pizza!

Total Utilization; Simplicity

2011-03-20T19:56:00.000-04:00

Okay, so the title is boring, but it gets my point across.

For dinner last night we had my cousins over for a make-your-own-pizza dinner. We ended up with extra sausage, squash, caramelized onions, tomatoes and red peppers.

We didn't really feel like making pizza again, but he and I really enjoy total product utilization. We're taking the left over products and tossing them with garlic, olive oil and serving it over pasta.

Matt just jokingly asked me if "I'm blogging about "his excellent culinary skills again"

"I'm blogging our enjoyment of using our leftover ingredients in a different and tasty way; so yes, I am blogging about your excellent culinary skills."

It's a really simple dinner. We're kicking it up a notch with the carbs with the addition of well seasoned bread sticks, made with the left over pizza dough.

Not much of a post; just wanted to point out that using left overs is a nifty idea and an easy way to stretch the grocery bill....

Corned Beef Hash Love

2011-03-15T16:19:00.002-04:00

The first time I can recall eating Corned Beef Hash was about a year ago. Matt and I were on our way to Ikea to look at apartment stuff. We stopped at a diner on the way up, and something on the special's menu intrigued me: Corned beef hash with eggs.

I couldn't remember ever eating such a thing, but I knew I liked corned beef, and any food ending or starting with "Hash" (Hash browns being a favorite). I knew it was simple diced beef with diced potatoes and pan fried to a crispy savoriness. What omnivore doesn't like diced meat and potatoes?

I was presented with an incredible serving of corned beef hash with two scrambled eggs and a generous portion of home fries...And a slice of melon...And a side of buttery rye toast. There were so many different aromas going on in my plate. I picked up my fork and dug in; feeling something like an idiot for having such a large plate of food, while Matt opted for fruit with some oatmeal.
"Why is it whenever I order a big breakfast, you order fruit? I feel like you're Jack Sprat, or something." I said, jabbing the air with a fork of melon at him.

Meanwhile, my breakfast was delicious. The hash cooked to a crisp, moist, salt and peppery mass of deliciousness. I was in love. I feasted and savored...I admit it, I gorged. It was some of the best breakfast I had in a long time. The most simple dishes are the best dishes.

A year later and I'm excited to try Matthew's Corned beef hash. Last night we braised corned beef. For lunch today I enjoyed a corned beef pressed Reuben (regrettably sans rye bread). The only natural plan of action would be corned beef hash. And ~~possibly~~ eggs cracked into it. It is going to be an explosion of flavor and textures.

Matt's small dicing the potatoes, almost when he would occasionally make brunoise potatoes; a delightfully nastily difficult small dice. He'd then cook them with diced onions into an incredible crisp and crunchy breakfast side dish only edible with a spoon.

It smells garlicky in here. All the flavors are canoodling. It's sensual. The sound of frying, the oil popping and the steam rising from the cast iron skillet. It's a dance. A rehearsed tango of sounds, smells and flavors.

This is the hardest part. He's just cracked the eggs in....And now I need to wait until the eggs are cooked. Agony! It just smells like breakfast with the meat, crispy potatoes and now the cooking egg.

At first bite, I am enamored. This corned beef hash is better than I remember. The small diced potatoes, crisp but soft, the tender of the beef, the egg playing backup. It is crisp, it is crunchy, tender, salty, starchy and satisfying. The crunch and mouth feel is a lot like a tator tot: outer crisp with a meaty inside. Completely delicious and simple meal. I can't put into words the delight the crunch of potatoes and meat bring, but I know you know exactly what I am talking about.

Old Bagels

2011-03-08T17:37:00.001-05:00

I know your secret. You have some day old bagels in your kitchen somewhere. I also know you will probably never eat those bagels, and it will sit there, getting harder and older and less attractive.

Matt came home from work with a paper bag of two-day old bagels (that he obviously was allowed to take home because they obviously wont sell one day old products, let alone two). At first I was incredulous. Why bring all these old bagels? We don't even have chive cream cheese to eat it with. We're never going to eat seven old bagels.

But then the light-bulb went off. Bagel chips. Of course. The perfect solution to old bagels or bread: slice or dice them, coat them in oil and seasonings, and dry them out into a tasty snack/salad topping.

I nearly sliced my middle finger tip off trying to slice a way word chunk, but my bagel slices were thin, heavily seasoned and blood free. They only took 30 minutes in a low oven, and ta-da! Bagel chips. Cheaper than any chips you can buy in the store, seasoned to your liking, and fresh. I was a little too trigger happy on the garlic powder and some are just a little overly crunchy (to the point where I eat one all I can hear in the middle of my head is the *CRUNCH* of the chips. But generally, I like them. I went light on the oil, and they are salty and carbtastic. Everything you'd want in a crunchy snack.

Old bread? Croutons! Old bagels or pita? Chips! You will never waste a leavened (or unleavened) product again.

Okay, so this isn't my 190th post, I deleted the old draft entries and now it's only a few away from 190..Guess now I can save it for something good!

Sweet Potato Pierogies

2011-03-06T20:23:00.002-05:00

I'm so excited to play with a recipe. I made some sweet potato Pierogi dough this morning, Matt and I are going to fill some of them with some sauteed ground beef and onions...A little like a Shepard's pie but absolutely not Shepard's Pie.

The dough is soft, smooth and pliable, like the normal dough for pierogies. I wasn't sure if the dough would come together any differently, but it's as soft and smooth as the standard. I'm sure cooked crispy and topped with sour cream they will be as good as any of the pierogis we've made...Except this time they are filled with beef instead of mashed potatoes.

We're having a bit of a "late" start with dinner. We went to Le Pain Quotidien for lunch with some family and I ate too much good food. When we got home, I made an Apple Tartin for Matt's co-worker. He knew I was a little bored and looking for something to do on the weekends, for weeks he'd been joking to Matt that I should make a Tartin for him. Finally I told Matt if he got the ingredients, I would.

Anyway, between not being hungry and the deliciously apple caramelly smelling dessert, we began cooking around 6:30.

Matt is cooking the ground beef with the usual various spices. Matt waited to cook the onions so they could cook down with the little bit of beef fat...For an extra shot of tasty.

So far, these look a lot like empanadas....Which is making me fantasize about all kinds of savory filled pockets of dough from all over the world. Empanadas, pierogies, pasties, eggrolls, dumplings, ravioli....but I digress....

Usually we pan fry our pierogies, but we're going to try baking them tonight. Mostly in the interest of saving time and oil.

I'm really excited to try these pierogies. Our first batch of piergoi dough was made with leftover heavily seasoned mashed potatoes. With this batch I kept it clean; adding only salt and a little sugar. Along with the fact I used sweet potatoes I'm not sure what to expect; except that it will probably be crispy, sweetish and meaty.

Baking them in the oven gave them a characteristic of nearly every cultural pocket listed above: crispy like eggrolls, soft inside like dumplings, and they smelled a little like empanadas.

These are such good pierogies I have left my plate to express to you exactly how good they are. The beef flavor is so prominent and full bodied...Beefy and so moist. The onions blending with the beef and crust...the crust is tender, not even close to being overworked. The sour cream bringing it home like a cold, creamy back-up singer. It all comes together like the perfect melody.

The crust is unique. It's almost a pie crust. The standard pierogi dough that I've made has a more chewy taste to it...But the dough made with sweet potatoes is tender, almost flaky and a little crisp. It brings another layer of flavor that is subtle, but without it I know I would miss it.

Savory filled dough fashioned into a pocket is one of my favorite special meals. I love it for its prominence in every culture, for their adaptability, but especially for their reliable deliciousness.

I am so lucky to be marrying a guy who is such an amazing cook. Delicious.

Garlic, Caramelized Onions, Peppers and Sausage Pizza.

2011-03-03T18:45:00.000-05:00

...Because who needs a goodnight kiss when you can have all that?

Pierogies and beer, Take Two

2011-03-01T18:33:00.001-05:00

Matthew and I are simple folk. We're not the type to go out at 9pm and come in at 2 am. Occasionally we'll splurge on a nice meal, but more often than not it's our old favorite, Edo's , where the service is good and the food delicious.

On this chilly March night, our anniversary, we're staying in and making pierogies (again) and kielbasa. A favorite and always delicious.It's from the freezer from the last time I made the dough, but I want to use it up; I'm eager to make sweet potato pierogi dough and perhaps do a sweet filling (or ground beef. or pork, or veggies....).

Looking forward to seared polish sausage, crispy pierogies and caramelized onions.

Excuse the quick post, but there's beer to be drunk and kielbasa to be eaten!

Crispy Chocolate

2011-02-28T14:50:00.000-05:00

The heat is turned off, my equipment is bone dry and my knife is sharpened.

I am, of course, about to embark on something I haven't done in many years. I'm going to temper lovely milk chocolate into a tasty candy bar. Creamy, sweet and crispy.

My five year anniversary with Matthew is tomorrow (March 1st!). I've been wanting to use my marble more, and I wanted to make him something special enough to put work into it, but not so ingredient dependent that I'd need to get cocoa butter, almonds and rice paper (although one day I will make nougat!).

Tempering chocolate isn't hard, and if I was someone who did this all the time it wouldn't take long. But since I'm a little out of practice, it's going to take some patience.
Thanks to my lovely fiance, I have my incredibly smooth, cool, cold retaining marble. The marbling method just feels special. Pouring a percentage of the melted chocolate on it, taking an off set and smoothing it out, and turning the chocolate into itself over and over, until it cools. Gently scraping it up and putting it back into the bowl and stirring stirring stirring. It's a little messy, at least for me.

Something about standing there, smoothing the chocolate over the marble was relaxing. I knew the method of tempering chocolate and I had proper equipment to get there.

The trick to melting chocolate well is to use bowl that fits into a small saucepan that allows for a lot of room between the water and the bowl. You use very low heat and chop the chocolate into small pieces without any large chunks. This allows the chocolate to melt evenly at a low tempreture. You do not want a lot of steam coming from the pot. The enemies of chocolate is direct heat and water. Both are equally bad and must be avoided at all costs. You don't want any moisture to get into the chocolate. There is nothing worse than burnt seized chocolate. It is unfixable and results in saddness and possible swearing.

It took some patience and lots of stirring, but I brought the temperature of the melted milk chocolate to 85 degrees. I poured some chocolate into a bowl to use for poprocks, and the rest for rice crispies.

It isn't anything special, you'd never find in a chocolate shop looking like this, but it's tasty and simple. I know Matt will be really happy with it and love that I made it for him. I just hope I can make it last to our actual anniversary and after that for more than a day.

Marbling the chocolate to allow it to cool

Pop Rocks chocolate, nothing too special, but still interestingly fizzy

This demonstrates exactly why I am not a cake decorator. Piping skills are not my forte

So Happy Early Anniversary Matthew dear! This time next year we'll be planning a wedding!

Whoopie Pie Filling

2011-02-19T21:38:00.000-05:00

I'm not going to lie to you...... I have two small glass bowls of whoopie pie filling in my freezer.

What is a whoopie pie, you say? What is it filled with, you ask?

Whoopie pies are similar to a Devil Dogs. Traditionally they are flat disks of chocolate cake, filled with a vanilla marshmallow filling.

There are many creation stories with whoopie pies, ranging from the classic and rewarding baking mistake to being of Dutch Amish country origin. Wherever they are from, whatever variety they are, they are delicious. A good whoopie pie needs to have cake thin enough to not overwhelm the airy whipped filling, but not so much filling it squishes onto your fingers. Simple syruping the cakes is prefered.

I've made whoopie pies twice in the past month. Both times I've been left with superfluous filling. What's a girl to do? It contains some of the best confectionery ingredients: butter, powdered sugar, pure vanilla extract and of course, the multi-functional, light and creamy Marshmallow Fluff. Whip it on the paddle with a few other buffers and you have a Marshmallow Freak's icing: fluffy, airy, light, vanilla, sweet. I could never waste ingriedents! I could use it again for another dessert!

...At least that's what I told myself. 24-Hours later I found myself digging a spoon into the semi-soft mass of white. At the most frozen it feels a little like rolled fondant, but when it thaws it looks more like the wonderful bucket of tacky ooblecky fondant at school..I think I was the only one in the class that liked that stuff. Shockingly sweet, it melts in your mouth mouth. Subtle vanilla, all marshmallow goodness.
..Yes, I know I have a "problem" with sweets, and I'm sure my confectionery and baker peers would support my slight issues with marshmallow and all things icing.

I'm only about halfway through the first glass bowl, sporadically touched when I'm craving something sweet, and I haven't really touched the second one yet, so maybe I'm not beyond hope.

Chicken Pot Pie Part Two

2011-02-16T20:21:00.002-05:00

There are so many ways to use a left over roasted chicken: chicken quesadillas, chicken salad, chicken and biscuits.Chicken casserole, chicken wraps. On and on and on.

But the best way is making chicken pot pie. I've had a few pot pies in my day, and the only way to make it is with a roasted chicken. I've never been a fan of boiled chicken, but I enjoy poached. The flavor of roasted is so much better. But if you insist at least do more than salt, pepper and basic mirepoix. Whether it's one chicken or 10, it's worth the effort. That's what leftovers are for, right!?

No, a roasted chicken adds to the party. Moist and plump, a properly seasoned roasted bird adds flavor to the pie.

I have a little over 5 pounds of chicken. We used a little last night to make quesadillas, but I feel ~~adventurous~~ like filling some time today, and want to make some pot pies. A fun undertaking. I like to get my hands wrist deep in chicken fat. It makes me feel productive.

For this pot pie, I chopped carrots, parsnips, potatoes and onions. Very traditional and basic. But I sauteed the onions with finely diced mushrooms and tossed in some corn towards the end. The best part about any pot pie or casserole is using up ingredients. I'm a big fan of not throwing out things if I can help it.

I'm making the crust, but if you aren't very handy around crust, the refrigerated store bought stuff is awesome, too. I'm using the basic ratio, although I'm doing half butter and half shortening. Which is my preference, some swear by using all of either, which is fine, too. It's "Grandma's secret recipe!!", because fat, flour, water, and salt is a secret. But really, it's not. It's a basic ratio that every baker and chef knows. 3 parts flour, 2 parts fat, 1 part (ice) water. 3-2-1 pie dough. It's the first thing I made in my first Baking Principles class at the C.I.A. It's going to be full of tender flaky goodness.

As for the creamy binding filling, I allow myself one act of "cheating": cream of chicken soup. The only reason for this is it is always consistent. You know it will thicken and moisten properly and you know what to expect. I add the water according to the can, and season it accordingly with salt, pepper, garlic/onion powder and paprika.

I have a huge treat today! For Christmas, Matt gave me a beautiful marble slab. And I cannot wait to roll the dough out on its smooth cool surface. It's so pretty and smooth and sexy. It's all I can do to not shiver when I run my hands across it...I'm sure you can relate and appreciate this. It's the ultimate luxury to me.

....Anyway.....The dough rolled out beautifully. No sticking, no tearing. Smooth and silky. The pot pies came together really well. Slightly pink from paprika, the filling poured thickly into the shells.

I crimped and wrapped the two pies and put one in the freezer for a later meal, and one in the fridge for tonight.

The pie baked into a soft brown bubbly, savory smelling filling pie. This is the part that I am always uncertain about. Pull it too early, and the filling will run. Pull it too late and the filling will be dry and the crust over baked. Still haven't quite found that happy middle ground, but I'm happy with the runnier side because by the time we go to eat the leftovers the liquid seems to redistribute itself into more freestanding slices.

The crust was perfect. Flaky and tender. Thanks to my education and possibly Alton Brown. It served as a fantastic vessel for the filling, sturdy, but not tough. The inside was well seasoned with plump chunks of chicken peeking out with the assorted root vegetables. Other than the fact I really should have given it about a half hour to rest it was tasty.

For the two of us, a 9 inch pot pie goes a very long way. For the average sized family, it'll be deliciously filling with a salad.

I don't think it's any more or less labor intensive than the average family meal if you account for a leftover chicken and store bought crust. Who doesn't love a creamy, meaty, vegetable filled flaky pastry on a cold day anyway?


Pretty, pretty, pretty marble

Beef Stew, Raspberry Lambic and Chocolate Mousse

2011-02-13T19:57:00.001-05:00

"I'm not sure if the Raspberry Lambic will go well with the stew, but damn it's good!" I say, enjoying a sip of the aromatic raspberry Belgium beer.

Matt's bustling about the stove, finishing the beef stew, seasoning, thickening. Good smells and noises. The Raspberry Lambic is a treat. Matt gave it to me for Christmas, which was hilarious, as I gave him a bottle of port. But the Lambic we saved for today. It is cold, full bodied and tastes like fruit soda. It's deep purple with a pleasantly fizzy mouth feel. It's a beer that doesn't taste like beer; it's sweet and fruity. I'd peg it for more of a dessert beer, if such things exist.
But I don't mind if it doesn't pair with the beef stew. Its bubbly sweetness will go well with the salty full bodied of the stew. Very palette cleansing.

The sauce was very impressive. Rich and bold with a slight peppery kick to it. Carrots, parsnips and mushrooms poked out of the richness. Falling apart cubes of beef nestled in with the root vegetables and pearl onions.

This beef stew is amazing. It was better than almost any stew I experienced at school.

The chocolate mousse parfaits could have done with slightly better presentation and chocolate cake, but they will be tasty, especially since I soaked the bottom cake layer with rum, and the second with vanilla simple syrup.
The mousse parfaits aren't bad, really. I think next time I'd use chocolate cake and a darker mousse. But it tastes like fresh chocolate marshmallows right off the kitchen aid. The rum was a biit too much, but no complaints!

Hangover Pizza

2011-02-12T20:09:00.004-05:00

A cozy restaurant is home to the quirkyily named "Hangover Pizza"

My mother and I visited my sister in Astoria, NY for lunch, to see her apartment and to walk around.
Our brunch location, Vesta is small and decorated with black and white photography art, a few tables and local wine on tap.

I wasn't sure what I wanted to try. I was craving a burger, but knew I can get a burger anywhere. But hangover pizza? With sausage, potato, pancetta and fried eggs? That sounded delicious even without a hangover.

When it came to the table, it easily could have fed all three of us. Two fried eggs nestled on top in the middle, the yolks barely cooked, and a little of the surrounding whites shimmied.
The crust was thin and crispy. I carefully slid the eggs off the pizza and poked at the yolks until they ran, and used it as a dipping sauce. The whites were sandwiched in between the crust with all the salty meaty fillings, the hot stringy cheese. The sauce was tangy and spicy. Getting a bite of each combination was pizza harmony. I was completely absorbed in my food.
Meanwhile, my sister's thick cut whole wheat french toast was airy, soft and sweet. Not soggy or too eggy with coating. It didn't really need more than the jam that came with it. My mother's Bankie: fried eggs on top of poltena, mushrooms, asparagus topped with a fried egg, was creamy. I haven't had polenta in a long time but if it was cooked as well as this I'd be adding it to my rotation of meals.
Everything was incredible. The local wine on tap was neat and pretty tasty. It's something I rarely, if ever see. The restaurant had a laid back feel to it.
We all shared eachother's meal, and my pizza was nearly finished. I could have polished off the last two slices without a problem. Something my sister assured me would not be anything horrible or looked down upon. I considered it, but thought about how delicious it was and how much more I could enjoy it the next day. To my delight they wrapped up the egg, too! Awesome.

I didn't take my camera, and I wish I did! But there's a photo on yelp, and it hardly does it justice.

Later, we visited Parisi, an Italian bakery in Astoria. When we first walked into the small bakery it was empty, but within 3 mintues the line was out the door. I had no idea what I wanted. I was yearning for the butter cookies filled with jam or dipped in chocolate, but did I want something more Italiany? Or did I want fresh bread or a New York Black and White?
I opted for the butter cookies. Chocolate jam filled and some chocolate dipped. My mother got eclairs, elephant ears, a linzer tart and canolis to take home for everyone. They filled the canolis to order, so the shells were flaky and crisp and the filling was creamy and sweet. If I had canolis like these in my youth, I'd probably like them a lot more now. And been spoiled with good pastries.
I waited til we got home to try the cookies. This is how Italian butter cookies should taste. Tender, buttery, and just the right amount of moist crisp. I wish I had gotten a whole pound. But of course there's always next time!
In my area, we have maybe four real bakeries...or at least what I'd call bakeries. In Astoria there's about four bakeries for every other block. It seems like every other block there is a bakery, restaurant and convenience store for each local ethnicity: mainly Greek, Italian and Spanish. What a luxury to live in such a place!

Blocks of all restauarants. Butcher shops with pigs dangling in the window, saying "Hey. I'm a pig. Hanging in the window next to a skinned lamb. Don't you want to buy me?" Yes. Yes I do.
Anyway, I was surprised by how reasonable the prices was. In Fairfield county you expect high prices for any bakery, weather they deserve it or not. But two cappuccinos, a hot tea, half a pound of decadent cookies, a biscotti and a lemon cookie was only about $13.

All in all a crazy delicious day.

Chicken Nuggets

2011-02-10T20:19:00.002-05:00

What do you think of when you think of Chicken nuggets? Is it childhood dinners of amoeba wonky shaped chicken from the freezer with a side of mac and cheese? Or sitting down to a happy meal with pink goo compressed into a "chicken nugget"?

Ask a dozen children what their favorite food is and chances are chicken nuggets are on the top 8. There's even a Tyson commerical vouching for that fact.

I ~~was~~ am a chicken nugget lover. From Purdue's Fun shapes as a child to Trader Joe's "Drummets", even the alluring veggie nuggets. As long as it was crispy and had a good dip to go with it, I was and am a happy camper.

Now my tastes have changed. My chicken nugget with a side of fries has grown into something slightly more sophisticated. I've traded in fries for salad. And I've traded in the frozen stuff for my own fresh variety.

I made chicken nuggets tonight, and as most things are, they were better than the frozen stuff you can buy. They take a little longer to make, but they are worth the time.
Some people might think making your own chicken nuggets is a grievous task. Well...I suppose if you have a few kids, and you and your spouse work (if you have one) and you just got off of work and soccer practice and there's homework to be done and..... Yes. I totally get you....And you're killing my argument, buddy. Stick with me for a second.

But there's something you might not realize. Chicken nuggets require pantry ingredients. The only thing you need to buy or thaw out is the chicken breast or boneless/skinless chicken thighs.A little prep work and bada bing! You have dinner.

I took out skinless chicken thighs from the freezer this morning, and when Matt got home, he deboned and cut them into small chunks. Two chicken thighs yielded 14 nuggets. He dredged them in flour, egg and our own seasoned breadcrumbs and set them aside. It only took about 15 minutes.

Neither of us were very hungry yet. Well, I was, but I didn't want to eat so early. So I threw in potatoes to bake, washed lettuce for a salad and let the chicken nuggets sit on the counter.

When we were getting ready to eat and the baked potatoes were done, I heated up a medium pan with a shallow amount of oil. I only fried 7 at a time; about 3 minutes per side.
They bubbled and made that lovely noise. You know the noise. The sizzly cracking noise that instigates hunger? The smell of frying breadcrumbs ascends the nose. When you turn them at just the right moment when they are the right shade of golden brown without even checking them and you think "Damn, I'm good!".

These chicken nuggets really aren't bad for you. If cooked at the right oil temperature you'll be enjoying perfectly crispy, non-oily chicken nuggets. They're possibly a little better than the brands: You know every ingredient going into the meal. No Sodium Phosphate, no Potassium Lactate, no Guar Gum, All of these ingriedents can be found here on a package of Purdue Fun Shapes chicken nuggets. But with your chicken nuggets you have chicken, egg, flour, and the bread crumbs (and bonus points if the bread crumbs are all natural!).

And they are delicious! Chicken nuggets made by hand are crispy and flavorful. The trick is you buy or make the breadcrumbs plain, and then season to your own taste. None of that "Italian Seasoning" if you don't want it. How about Spanish? Or you just want to go to town with a lot of paprika?

But my winning argument is this. If you're a busy parent, these can be made ahead of time. Got some time Sunday night? Prepare a batch of chicken nuggets. Only don't cook them. Wrap and keep in the fridge and if you plan on eating them in two or three days you're golden (brown).

Meanwhile, our dinner came out fabulously crunchy. All kinds of crunch. The prep and cook time was only about 25 minutes. We paired it with a simple salad, the wet crunch of iceberg marrying the dry crisp of the nugget. Add a drizzle of honey Dijon dressing and you have all kinds of captivating flavors going on.

I wish I'd remembered to take a picture, but the nuggets looked like mini chicken cutlets. I really like using boneless/skinless chicken thighs for nuggets.Thighs are a little firmer than chicken breast, so for me they aren't my first choice for baking. But chicken thighs in nuggets is perfect. The flavor of the chicken is compressed in the thighs, and you don't really notice the firmness when they are sliced in bite sized pieces.

Making your own chicken nuggets is less embarrassing than having a package of drummets in your freezer. They are slightly impressive looking sitting on a bed of salad greens. Or stabbed with toothpicks with a fancy cheese dip on an Hors d'œuvre platter. Even on your kid's dinner plate.

Trust me. Try making your own chicken nuggets once, and you wont regret it.

Fresh Tortillas!

2011-02-07T18:11:00.001-05:00

I'm in the mood for some soft tacos, but we only have two tortillas. I'm not one to run out to the store for one thing, so the only solution was to make my own! I haven't made tortillas of any sort since school, but I remember them coming out well enough for me to have another stab at it.

The recipes online were all very similar when it came to flour/baking powder/fat/liquid amounts. Some swore by lard, while others said oil or shortening. But this recipe caught my interest with her photos, story and plethora of recipes.

I'm excited for it. I found the recipe from another blog if you'd like to check it out. Meanwhile, it's an awesome website and I recommend spending a little time sifting through it. Anyone who has a recipe for bacon jam on their site is cool in my book.

So, I started these at about 3:45. I wasn't in a hurry and I knew ten or fifteen minutes of extra resting wouldn't hurt. I didn't roll mine out to as big as her recipe called for, but I figured by the time I got to cooking them I could hand stretch them accordingly.

By 5 I was ready to cook them, The tortillas were soft, elasticy and ready to cook. I'm lacking the proper cast iron skillet, so I have to settle for my overly large, deep frying pan.

I love the way the air bubbles expanded and browned, and the ease in which the tortilla slid along the pan without any fat in the pan. It was all I could do to not swipe it and eat it directly out of the pan. A quick turn and 45 seconds later, my first tortilla was out of the pan.
These are the best tortillas I have had in a very long time. They actually have a texture and flavor. They're soft, and tender and warm. What have I been missing? They were good on their own.

Matt and I put together our plates and sat down. I ripped off a small piece of warm tortilla and piled a little sour cream, caramelized onions, corn and chicken. This was incredible! It actually brought something to the party other than a vessel in which to carry tasty fillings. Actually, we don't even really need anything with the tortillas. Matt and I can probably just sit here and eat these plain or with a little bit of fresh salsa.

I'm totally hooked. These tortillas have a bit of inactive time, but it's a relatively quick and such an easy recipe. It brought so much more to the meal and the quality was better than any brand name tortilla.

Thanks, Homesick Texan, for such an awesome recipe. I can't wait to look through your wonderful blog more and find another recipe to try!

Cake Batter Cookies

2011-02-04T09:48:00.000-05:00

There's nothing wrong with cake mix. The consistent yielding product, the ability to doctor it up, and its multi-use is inexpensive and tasty.

I like to keep a batch of cookie dough balls in the freezer. It's just the two of us. Two people cannot and should not be eating dozens of cookies. With cookie dough in the freezer you have fresh baked cookies on hand all the time! It's a wonderful thing.

The cake mix cookies use few ingredients, and are open to your own interpretation of fillings.Very thrifty, and you aren't compromising taste or quality for the sake of thrift either. I mean, sure, at a real bakery or cafe you can get gourmet cookies that are outstanding and possibly gigantic. But for two people who like to enjoy a fresh warm cookie once or twice a week, they do the job. Warm and gooey, with a cold glass of milk? No one can refuse such simple goodness.

For my cookies, I used mini chocolate chips, a sprinkle of white chips, and a smidgen of dried diced pineapple. Moist, soft, and just enough balance of everything.

For your entertainment, here's the recipe. I bet you have a box of cake mix in your pantry right now that's dying to be used!

1 box of cake mix. Any kind, any flavor
2 eggs
1/2 cup oil (or one stick melted butter or margarine)
1/2 cup oatmeal (I choose to run mine through a food processor to make it more flour-like)
1 tsp vanilla
Combine in a bowl, adding a few tablespoons more water if the dough is too dry, but you want it to be a little like wet sand.
Add in
1 cup of any kind of filling you like, in any amounts. Small pieces of dried fruit, assorted chips, sprinkles, M&Ms, even chopped candy bars.

Mix well and drop by the spoonful onto greased cookie sheets. Bake at 350 for 8-10 minutes. Or take spoonfuls, roll into balls and place into rows on a small cookie sheet. Place in freezer for at least 30 minutes. Transfer into a freezer bag and freeze until you need a cookie! Just let the cookies thaw for about 10-15 minutes before baking as above. I found the recipe here, where there are four other cake mix recipes.

This is a really fun idea for parents who want to have a baking activity for their kids but don't have the time, ingredients or patience. It only takes about 15 minutes and they can put in whatever fillings they want. Happy experimenting!

Sesame Chicken Jeopardy

2011-02-03T19:28:00.002-05:00

Brown rice is on the stove, the sauce is prepared and needs to cook. The chicken is "marinating" and the dry batter is ready to meet the liquids. Will this happen? Will I successfully prepare that crispy, sweet saucy, crunchy, so bad for you but so delicious sesame chicken?
I have a recipe and a hope. I hope that will be enough to throw together an American dish created by Chinese Americans.

Matt is slicing up Brussels Sprouts to stir fry. My only worry is the sauce wont come out sweet, spicy and tasty. But in case of something tragic we have some Hoisin and Rooster Sauce in the fridge.
The kitchen is ripe with the mingling scent of a bleached sink, sesame oil and cooking brown rice.

The recipe for the batter and sauce was pulled from different recipes from the web. The Chinese cookbooks I leafed through at the library had similar ingredients....But being me, I have a difficult time justifying measuring a quarter teaspoon of salt or a tablespoon of soy sauce when I can just as easily do a dash and a few shakes of the bottle.I have no problem measuring something to the gram when I am baking or at a job. But when it comes to home sauce cookery you can usually get away with measuring a few spices.

I forgot today started Chinese New Year! I'm glad I remembered, or we'd be getting ready to eat sauteed chicken with Brussels sprouts and some kind of potato. Don't get me wrong, that's a great meal. Except when I have an excuse to eat deep fried Chinese food I rarely like to turn it down.

I really hope the sauce comes out well. We've all had our fair share of bad Chinese Takeout that tastes like they tossed your fried chunks of chicken in sweetened ketchup. Sigh....what a waste of calories. We have this place called Ching's Kitchen in town. They have the most amazing fried pork dumplings. Their vegetables always taste fresh and always end up cooked just exactly how I like them. Every protein I've eaten from pork to tofu are wonderfully sauteed, steamed or deep fried. . Their sauces never too sweet or too salty or too thick. I know I can never copy their greatness, but I hope to manage something edible.

....This sauce is a complete pain. The liquid to cornstarch ratio is way off, I only used about an 1/8th cup rather than a quarter cup. But it was still way too thick! So now I have about 3 cups of sauce that is just 'okay'. I had to add in three times the vinegar, twice the water to make up for the thickness, and twice the soy sauce. A touch of ginger helped. But still, it's only okay.
I wonder if I called a restaurant and asked for a pint of their General Tso's, or their Sesame sauce. It would be weird and kinda embarrassing, but I wonder if they'd sell it to me. Probably not.

After squeezing in half an orange and a splash of fruit juice, the sauce is passable with the chicken, and I'm through playing with it. The brown rice is okay, but the Brussels sprouts were a little undercooked. The sauce was really thick, even after cutting it with more water and more vinegar. On one hand the meal was edible, but could have been better. But on the other hand, all that vinegar made my pot get cleaner and shinier than it has in a long time.

So there's that.

Also, this is my 175th post! Awesome!

Braised red cabbage, the recipe

2011-02-01T17:54:00.002-05:00

I've been talking about braised red cabbage, people seem to be interested in it, I wanted to share the recipe! This recipe will serve about 2-3 people.

Stovetop Braised Red Cabbage
Half a medium onion, chopped.
A quarter of a head of red cabbage, sliced on the thinner side.
3 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
4 tablespoons sugar or honey
Quarter cup water
Salt and pepper to taste, plus a dash of cinnamon

Saute the onions in a medium saucepan until soft. Throw in the cabbage, vinegar, sugar (or honey) and water and mix well.

Cook uncovered for about 20-25 minutes over medium/medium low heat, stirring occasionally but attentively. You might need to add a few tablespoons water as it cooks.

As the cabbage cooks, it will look like the purple is fading from the cabbage, but as it continues cooking down the cabbage will condense into this wonderfully dark purple color. The water will reduce and all the flavors will begin to condense.

Since cabbage can be eaten raw, it's up to you when it is done. It is generally done when it is tender, soft and has a little bite to it. But if you prefer it a little softer or crisper in either direction wont cause any harm!

Season to taste and add the dash of cinnamon. You might want to add a little more sweetness to it, or a little more vinegar, but only do so a little at a time. You'll probably want to add a little more sugar. And by "season" I mean add the spices and seasonings you like: salt, pepper, garlic/onion powder/chili powder. Trust me on the cinnamon, it really makes the flavor of the cabbage pop!

Braised red cabbage is so tasty! It's in season, inexpensive and red cabbage is full of nutrition! What's best of all is it is sweet and delicious.

I never thought I would eat cabbage, and here I am excited to share a recipe for red cabbage with you.

Try it out, it's a nice change from the usual vegetable side dish!

Ch-Ch-Changes!

2011-01-30T09:27:00.000-05:00

Decided it was time for a change in my layout. I know it's silly to point out, and it was a little hard for me to give up my dots! But this is pretty cool too. I enjoy the blue gas burner flames.

Pancakes and Pulled Pork

2011-01-28T17:09:00.005-05:00

I have no idea what to make for dinner. I wanted to make a sauceless sausage pizza. Like in those pizza chain commercials with sauce to dip? But we're out of yeast (unfathomable!). Matt still has a cold, so why bother making something tasty if he can't eat it. I offered him pancakes. Caloric, soft and easy to eat. Just what a sick person needs. I'm more of a savory breakfast eater. My sweet breakfasts are limited to real bake shops and holidays.But pancakes for one sick person is no trouble to make.

I'm staring into the freezer, debating frozen pizza, grilled cheese with bacon and looking into a jungle of frozen meats. Dinner for one is so unmotivating.
Matt wasn't in the mood for bacon, which rules out the motivation to defrost and cook bacon.

I finally settled on pulled pork. Put in a sandwich? Or eggs?....What about cooked inside a pancake?

Now, there's an idea. How would it taste? Sweet, fluffy pancakes with pulled pork in the middle?...It sounds like an interesting concept. It could be delectable or a wasteful disaster. Pulled Pork Pancake drizzled with maple syrup?...That actually sounds almost good, to my over active sweet tooth.

It sounds like something you'd find in one of those overly trendy restaurants that puts Celery Ice Cream and Bacon Vodka on the menu. Not like that's a bad thing.

It'd kind of be like a filled crepe. Only thick. And a pancake.

...I'll have to think about it. I think I've been so bored today I'm dying for a reason to play with my food.

More Later!

**** Later *****
The more I thought on it, the more I wanted to try it out. I know eggs and pulled pork is all kinds of awesome proteiny deliciousness. But I really felt like playing. How bad could it be? Pancakes: Tasty. Pulled Pork: Delectable. How could this possibly go wrong!?

I made silver dollar pancakes. I figured pulled pork in the pancake might be a little difficult to make consistent throughout.
They came out a little thicker than I might have liked, but they are fluffy and light just the same.

I'm stacking these pancakes as artfully as I could, but I haven't taken a food photography class, so I can't figure out anything but making it taste good, and it never feels right when I arrange it this way or that. So screw it. It's going to get cold! So I'm sorry if it isn't ascetically pleasing.
The first forkful looks delicious. I don't know why I thought this would be weird. It looks just like a pulled pork sandwich. Isn't there a whole chain of Chicken and Waffles in the South?

The first forkful is delicious. The texture of the pancake is more pleasing
than bread or a bun; sweetish, light, soft...It's a pancake. The sauce from the pork absorbed into the layers of pancake.

All in all, pretty tasty. Almost exactly what I expected. The pork needs more sauce to make up for what is lost in pancake absorption, but now I know. Pancakes and pulled pork: not as weird as I thought.

Chicken Broth, Julia Child and Food Love

2011-01-28T12:08:00.003-05:00

Another lazy Friday (it is Friday, right?) I got a stack of movies at the library the other day to get through the "Snowver Kill" and Matt's cold. Mostly animated movies like "Hoodwinked", "How to Train Your Dragon" and "Up". But I also got "Julie and Julia". I put it on as I was making chicken broth with what was left of the roast chicken.

I've forgotten how much I enjoyed this movie. I love Meryl Streep as Julia. She's so charming. It's awakening the old me. The person who existed at The Culinary Institute of America. Who'd leap out of bed in the morning, put on her chef whites and with eager enthusiasm went to breakfast in the lower floor kitchen (Best breakfast and best place to eat!). The in-classmade sausage! The perfect homefries! The indescribable eggs, cooked to order! The fluffy pancakes or crisp and soft waffles. The kitchen was a carnival of so many wonderful aromas of breakfast. I wasn't an egg eater until I experienced a C.I.A Breakfast. Their Daily Special Scramble has changed my Breakfast Life.

I loved to eat and to learn at school. I couldn't get enough of sitting in the bakeshop, listening to these incredibly talented Chefs explain to me how these wonderful ingredients work together to create crusty sourdough, airy chocolate mousse and caramel filled chocolates.

Julia is showing me again that love of food. Food! Food is life for me. I long for what Julie and Julia has done. At home in the kitchen, experimenting with this and that just for the experience of learning.
I loved learning that in the baking world, precision is practically anything. A few degree difference in the water temperature when proofing yeast can make your yeast well fed, bubbly and happy or a dud. Or how well your meringue will whip depending on how clean your bowl is and how warm the whites are. It's all so fascinating and delicious.

If I had a job that could allow me to spend my time off and my money just playing with my food again Matthew and I would be incredibly happy, well fed and a few pounds overweight. I would spend all day on a beef stew. Hours on tempering chocolate for candy. Work endlessly on creating the perfect baguette. Aahh, maybe someday.

I can't fully describe the love I used to have for food...The love that's coming back little by little since I left my last job. Now I love to plan meals, think of the best way to cook beef or pork. Dream of a great pizza dough. Food is such a simple joy and pleasure. It's love. It's creating something out of simple things. And Julia got that. She wanted us to know that. Her passion for cooking and helping us be able to cook well is a gift.

...My chicken broth is a little fatty. Which adds an extra step of chilling the broth so I can skim it before I put it in the freezer in little baggies,

Haphazard Soup

2011-01-26T15:58:00.000-05:00

Matthew has had a cold for a few days. Which means I'm cooking dinner for one. Last night I made myself pulled pork quesadillas with corn and cheddar. It was everything a quesadilla needs to be: cheesy, meaty and crispy. The sour cream was the usual deliciously creamy cold addition.

Last night Matthew asked me to throw together some soup: sauteed cabbage, chicken, carrots. We keep boulion cubes for assorted uses, and served as the base. It really wasn't much, but when cooking for someone who couldn't taste anything I didn't have much to loose; how would he know if it wasn't great?

He asked for the same thing today, so I took more care this time, and made a bigger batch. I chiffonaded the cabbage into smaller bite sized pieces and sauteed it with more spices and some corn. I picked apart the chicken to nothing more than skin and bones, and threw in a drumstick into the pot for a little more flavor. I even threw in a bay leaf for good measure. I went more heavy handed on the pepper, paprika, onion and garlic powder.
The soup is simmering and it really doesn't smell too bad. I'm just waiting on the carrots to cook through and it'll be ready to eat. Even though it smells alright, I think I'm going to stick to something else. We have a small amount of beef in the fridge that might be tasty in a stir fry or sauteed for a salad.

Cara Cara Oranges

2011-01-24T15:22:00.001-05:00

My winter love has returned. I have a very small window for the relationship, and it is quick and delicious.

These little jewels appear to be normal oranges. But on the inside, the flesh is a light pink. They are juicy and some of the sweetest fruit I have ever tasted.
I discovered them this time last year at Trader Joes. Their quirky display and promise of "The sweetest orange" sold me. I wanted to get healthier anwyay, and my favorite Honey Crisp apples were out of season, and I was craving a sweet replacement.
When I got them home I peeled it carefully with a paring knife, the way Matthew had shown me in oranges of the past. Very carefully peeling away as much as that bitter white stuff as I could.
I was surprised by their pink flesh. A little pinker than the flesh of a grapefruit. I sniffed it suspiciously before popping a segment into my mouth....Holy Cow. This particular orange was juicy. An explosion of sweet juice. It was sweet as a perfect summer melon. I was completely hooked. I ate two more of them before restraining myself, as they were a tiny bit pricey (but totally worth it).

My love for theme continued all winter. I'd go through a 3 pound bag every few days; one for work, two after work. It got a little excessive. But better for me to buy bags of oranges than Kit-Kat Bars, right?

Anyway, I went into the New Year quitting my job, and about a week later, I see the display of Cara Cara Oranges, and I felt such a sense of sadness! I'd have to kick my two bag a week habit fast and somehow pick out one perfect bag. One bag of oranges that looked the most perfect and succulent, and that would be my one bag of the season. Better than nothing, right?...I think I need to get just one more bag. I'm a little disappointed by the bag I selected! A few oranges were tasty, but maybe my memory is exaggerating the incredible swetness of last year.

These oranges are incredibly sweet and tasty and outrageously good for you, so if you see them, grab a bag and enjoy!

Pulled Pork

2011-01-21T19:41:00.000-05:00

I can sometimes be difficult. Maybe it was the years of learning disibilities and taking a longer road to make things more effiicent for me to learn ("It's longer and more efficient!"). But now I'm an adult, and find it hard to shake the difficult tendencies sometimes.
Case in Point:
I was wandering around Stop and Shop, looking for something tasty (and inexpensive) to cook for dinner, when I saw Pork Shoulder. Not only was it on sale, it had a $2.00 off coupon on it, which made the cost of the pork only $.77/lb. Even counting fabrication loss, it would only drive the Edible Purchase Cost of the pork to about $.99/lb, which was the sale price to begin with. Still a good deal.

Anyway, I get it home and clean out the sink to rinse and trim the fat.
12:30
The fat was thick and resistant to being parted with its lean meat. I struggled with the girth and the resistant fat. I washed my hands and the knives and sharpened them. I wished Matthew was here. He's a chef, and much more skilled with meats and trimming the fat than I am.
I sighed and kept struggling, working slowly and carefully with the now razor sharp knife. Inch by excruciating inch, I worked my way around the shoulder, carefully trimming away the bulk of the fat.

This is ridiculous. But finally the last of the fat tore away, leaving me with a 82% trimmed fat pork. Better than nothing. If I had more patience and more skill, I'd have a perfectly lean piece of meat on my hands. But since I am but a simple baker who likes to dabble in meat cookery, I had to take what I could get. besides, a little fat in pulled pork just means juicy tender moist meat.
Into the pan it goes and I massaged it well with oil and basic spices before putting it in a low oven.
After disinfecting the sink area, I'm ready to make some BBQ sauce. Easier and tastier than it sounds!
1:15 The sauce is simmering on the stove, I'm not going to bother tasting it until it has simmered for at least an hour.
2:36
The pork is coming along slowly. I thought it would be a little further along by now, but I have about 8 pounds of pork to cook, so it's going to take awhile. It even smells moist. I went a little too heavy handed on the paprika, but I think when it mingles with 8 pounds of meat plus the BBQ sauce, it'll taper out. The BBQ sauce is tasty! Sweet, and has a kick, but the aftertaste is a punch in the face of acidity that needs to be calmed with a lot of brown sugar and honey.
6:30Pork has been cooled, and it has been picked and pulled right down to the bone. Just need to sauce it and let it cook a little bit more. The meat is so good! Moist and tender and there's so much delicious dark meat! Can't wait to let it socialize with the BBQ sauce.
7:23

Holy Goodness. This meat is moist, sweet, tender. As far as flavor goes, it is sweet and mellow, something I prefer with my pulled pork. But it might need a little more spicy kick to it. But I'm overall happy with it and excited for a pulled pork omelet for Breakfast!

Eggplant Pizza!

2011-01-20T17:33:00.001-05:00

I was feeling adventurous today. Roasted eggplant pizza sounded zesty, but the half an eggplant I roasted shrank a bit more than I would have liked, and it needed a little more toppings.
I caramelized a giant onion, because when it comes to Matthew and I, we seem to go by the belief that "When in doubt, caramelize onions." That zucchini we had in the fridge only had another few days on it, so when the onions were shrunken and condensed, I used the deliciously oniony pan to flash cook them.

I had made the pizza dough this morning to give it time to rise. This recipe is so strange but so perfect. It only needs an hour to rise before it's completely ready to roll. To someone who at one point in her academic career knew and practiced all Tweleve Steps of Bread Baking, this feels a bit weird. I like to try and justify it myself stupidly by punching it down and letting it rise once or twice more.
Wtih the addition of basic pizza dough ingredients, I like to add a hefty dose of garlic powder and parsley. You gotta layer those flavors! The sauce is also from scratch, but pulled from the freezer for ultimate ease of prep!

I've been so bored lately, that I took my time carefully rolling out the dough, arranging it on the pan, pintching the dough into a crust to make it evenly thick throughout, and spreading the sauce. I enjoyed the art of making the pizza and layering everything just so.The eggplant was carefully spread onto the sauce due to the lack of quantity, I wanted every slice to contain each topping. I was most meticulous with the onions. Matthew and I clearly enjoy caramelized onions a little more than the average person, so I was methodical. I should have used another onion, for full pizza coverage, but I think I was adequate enough.

We have no mozzarella, but provolone not only melts well, but adds a sharp layer of flavor. It can also be artistically arranged!

I think I say this to Matthew everytime I make pizza, but this looks like the best pizza I have made. The dough is baking and rising up and feels pillow, soft and tender. The cheese is melting over the vegetables and the yeasty smell venting from the oven is making my mouth water.
The bottom bake is looking nearly perfect, and the cheese is just starting to get a pale golden brown on the edges. The crust is puffy and starting to brown. After it rests for a few minutes, Matthew or myself will attempt not to butcher it when we slice it and hopefully this pizza will taste as good as it smells and looks!

The final verdict: The onions with the cheese is a blend of sharp sweetness. The crust is a cushion of raised yeasted tenderness, but the bottom could have been better with an extra five minutes in the oven. Next time I'll keep it at a higher temperature longer, or knock the temperature down less. But overall satisfactory and filling.

Mac and Cheese Fondue

2011-01-19T18:12:00.009-05:00

I'm finally throwing together the mac and cheese with the left over bit of fondue tonight! Sunday lunch consisted of finishing off the rest of the baguette. I'm not sure I want to know how much cheese and bread Matthew and I consumed in that 24 hour span, but I can promise you it was worth it.

I sauteed some onions to throw into it this afternoon, and I'll probably toss in some frozen corn to my portion for another texture and flavor. And because I love corn in my mac and cheese.Ooh, maybe a dash of Rooster Sauce! If it were Spring, I'd like to toss in some steamed asparagus, if it were Summer, I'd like to dice up some plum tomatoes and fresh sweet corn. But since it's January and icy out, I'll have to go with my standby favorite of frozen corn. Matt just gave me the green light to go ahead and put corn in all of it. So I'm going to do better and sautee some frozen corn with some onions.

I've been looking forward to Mac And Cheese Fondue since we had our picnic lunch on Saturday. The cold consistency reminds me a little of those silver cheese pouches in the Kraft Dinner boxes. It's thick and shivery...But not neon orange. It still smells great, even cold in a bowl.

"I don't think I'll be needing all of this." I told Matt, feeling skeptical and holding up the half full bowl, containing probably a little more than two cups of thick cheese sauce.
"Ooh, just use all of it!" he said excitedly.

......This is ridiculously cheesy. Even for me or Matthew...Well, maybe not too cheesy for him. But I think the shells will cling onto enough of the cheesy goodness that it even itself out into a more fathomable ratio of cheese to shells. Either way, it smells great and the addition of onions and corn can only make it better.
This smells wonderful. A grown-up version of Mac and Cheese. It has herbs, spices, mustard, Worcestershire, and white wine. Onion sauteed corn and Havarti. It tastes as good as the fondue from Saturday, only now instead of a sexy baguette and salty kielbasa, it's covering pasta shells.This isn't the mac and cheese you had when your mom hired a babysitter (though if you did, lucky you!)

Nearly total or full utilization of leftovers is something Matthew and I (and I imagine everyone) like to aspire to. Nothing makes a meal more delicious to me than knowing we're using up things that normally would have been wasted. I know that might sound a little crazy to some people, but I know thrifty foodies speak my language.

Ratatouille and Maple Bacon Fat

2011-01-18T18:21:00.004-05:00

"This is not a leftover dinner. We bought this produce specifically for this reason." I said, as Matthew cut the zucchini.
"It is, since we used the vegetables for other reasons." He countered.

Meanwhile, the onions cooking in maple bacon fat is so good I want to take a fork and chunks of good bread and eat that for dinner.

Matthew's making Ratatouille tonight, inspired by seeing tomatoes, eggplant and zucchini in the reduced produce section at the store on Saturday (Don't knock it! Three grapefruits for $1.12? Two eggplants for $.99? Yes, please!)
Obviously, we used one eggplant last night, our justification for two of us buying two gigantic eggplants.

It took me awhile to come around to the dish. That movie featuring a talking rat and fancy skills....let's not visit that...I have a hard time liking things that the whole country is crazy over. He made it over the summer and it was a filling vegetarian dinner option (For when we feel like a vegetarian meal). But now that he's using bacon fat, maple bacon fat, no less, I'm salivating at the thought of onions mingling with the bacon, and fraternizing with the eggplant and tomatoes.
It smells so sweet and so good. The maple and the bacon scents are overpowering everything else and I can detect the onions, and it just smells fantastic. Matt and I both wished we still had that bread from Fairway!!

Matthew would like me to point out the reason for the onions being overpowering because it's the only thing that's cooked, and everything will have its own individual flavor, but I insist that is beside the point. Maple bacon fat is so good it's a sin, and pair that with onions cooked in it and you have a crime scene.

It's going to be another 20 minutes or so of cooking and mingling flavors, so in the meantime I'm prepping the last quarter of the eggplant for roasted eggplant pizza on Friday. Because (nearly) full utilization of product is always a beautiful thing.

Eggplant Cutlets

2011-01-17T18:54:00.004-05:00

This is almost too labor intensive to be worth it!

With all this free time I have, as well as not having to get up for work, dinner has been later and slightly more laborous as of late. I'm not trying to get dinner on the table before 6 because I no longer need to go to bed at 7:30.We're making eggplant cutlets with one of the two eggplants in the fridge. Crispy and good with pasta and sauce.

Most of the labor comes from the fact that Matthew and I find store bought bread crumbs of any brand or variety are much too expensive compared to the making our own with bread we already have and don't eat too much off.

The eggplant is peeled, sliced and salted, the hydroscopic deliciousness drawing the water out of the produce. The slices of bread are cooling and I'm dreading the loud, obnoxious sound of pulverizing bread in the Cuisinart.

........It really isn't that much work if you think about it. People long ago prepared a meal like this one in the same way, probably without much thought to how long it took or how inconvenient it seemed...Maybe I'm wrong. But for something we so seldom use it's worth the time to make our own.

Matthew's dredging method is much cleaner than mine, as he possess the patience to keep one hand for one task and the other for another task exclusively. I always end up with hush puppy fingers. He's much more efficient than me.
We like to bake ours with a healthy drizzle of oil, because we only use about a quarter of the oil, which we can use to pan fry other things like pierogies and Latkes or chicken cutlets, or fish, where it's a "requirement" to shallow fry.
I'm sure eggplant isn't the top of anyone's "Healthiest Vegetables" List...Well, I'm almost sure it isn't. But for an occasional inexpensive crispy dinner treat, so crunchy and secretly good with BBQ sauce....But you didn't hear that from me.

Cheese Fondue and More Kielbasa

2011-01-15T13:23:00.002-05:00

It's Saturday morning, and we're wandering around the new Fairway Market in Stamford. Matthew took a baguette from the display, and we grabbed a gallon of milk.

In the car on the way home, he mentioned he wanted to make cheese fondue. We still had pounds and pounds of sliced cheese in the freezer from a catering gig he did a few months ago. And with the other half of the kielbasa waiting to be cooked, it sounded like a tasty and filling special lunch.

The cheese fondue is aromatic. The sauteed kielbasa smells inviting. Cheese, bread and meat for lunch! A lazy Saturday watching BBC's "The Office" on DVD, on a spread out blanket having a picnic lunch.

It's a simple fondue of white cheeses: Swiss, Provolone, and Havarti. With just a smidgen of American to bind it together. Along with basic spices of salt, pepper, Worcestershire, garlic/onion powder, and mustard. It's so basic and so delicious.It started out a touch too thin as we began eating, but after the third or fourth bite, it cooled and thickened to the perfect viscosity to coat porous bread and thick slices of kielbasa.

The bread swelled with cheese as we submerged it into the fondue. Absorbing and coating a plain (but so very tasty) baguette with cheesy goodness.

Matthew thinks it needed about two ounces more cheese, but the flavor was good. My opinion is that it was a nice balance of all the cheeses, it was hot, viscous, and blended so well with the kielbasa and the bread.

We have a bit left, which I hope will make amazing Mac and Cheese on Monday.

Cabbage and Kielbasa

2011-01-14T19:26:00.001-05:00

....I smell onions cooking. One of my favorite cooking smells.

Braised red cabbage probably isn't your first reaction to "What sounds good for dinner tonight?" I've been there. When Matthew wanted to stove top braise cabbage the other night, I wasn't "exactly" "thrilled". But we had a whole head to use up and there wasn't anything else at that moment that we could do with it. Long story short, I was pleasantly surprised by not only the bright color, but it was braised in such a way that it tasted good. Sweet and not as cabbagey as I might have expected.

It's two nights later, and we'd like to use the remaining cabbage head. So we're making it again. Our side was figured out, but not the main portion of the meal. I managed to find kielbasa in the freezer, which would save me a return trip to the store.

The kielbasa cooking on the stove smells sweet, savory and like really, really thick hot dogs. I kind of wish we cooked it in the maple bacon fat I have in the fridge (I have no shame for my shameful love for bacon fat), but Matthew said it wouldn't matter at that point.

The cabbage is bubbling away on the stove, the potatoes are boiling, and we just need to sear the heck out of that kielbasa! It's all coming together in a winter night's meal. Fatty, filling, hot, sweet and salty. This meal couldn't be any more perfect if I braised beef. If only I had a proper beer to go with it.

This was an almost authentic Polish meal. The red cabbage was incredibly sweet and surprisingly tasty. The kielbasa had a mighty nice dark sear to it, bringing out the flavor depth. Put together and it was a burst of classic flavor pairing.

It has to be said, Matt is an amazing cook. Over our years of being together, he's introduced me to foods I never expected myself to be eating. If a guy can get a notoriously overly picky eater (as a child...okay, and into my teens) to not only sit and finish her serving of red cabbage, but to actually look forward to sitting down and eating it, he obviously has some kind of secret skill.

Pierogies and caramelized onions. Spectacular.

2011-01-13T18:52:00.002-05:00

We have a lot of potatoes.

Pounds of potatoes that were on the edge of sprouting.

After a meal of (crispy perfect) latkes we decided to make mashed potatoes with dinner last night so we could have pierogies for dinner tonight. Something I haven't really had since the days of school. Pan fried, topped with caramelized onions and sour cream. Hot, soft, crisped dough, the mellow cold sour cream, the savory flavor depth of the onions combine into this color wheel of flavors and textures.

Matt is currently rolling out the dough I made this morning (mashed potato based). They are looking plump and great. The onions on the stove smell wonderful.

The dough was blissfully easy. It got me thinking about other fillings for them besides mashed potato. What about a meat filling; some kind of annoyingly uncreative take on Shepard's Pie? Mashed sweet potatoes? Sauteed veggies? Everyone loves pan fried dough with assorted fillings! Every culture has their own and I haven't met a dough rolled, fashioned into a pocket, filled and fried I didn't like.

The mashed potatoes were slightly too garlicky last night, but tonight the flavor spread throughout the dough and brought out the other flavors of the ingredients. The pierogies are just a touch thicker than I remember, making them plump, soft on the inside, and a nice golden brown and delicious crisp on the outside.

We had three stout pierogies each, piled with sour cream, onions and sauteed corn. Filling as a single bite of lembas.

Food and Grammar Jokes

2010-11-15T18:12:00.003-05:00

Matt, reading a cookbook: "Oooh, Morels with Madeira!"
Me: "I only understood a third of that sentence."
Matt: "Well, 'Morels' is a mushroom, 'with' means 'to accompany' and Madeira is a sweet wine."
Me: *laughs uncontrollably* "That's good! That's really funny!"

For the record, I know what "Morels" are and what "With" is.

Mac And Cheese

2010-11-07T10:17:00.001-05:00

It was 12:30 on a Friday afternoon. I had been thinking about what to make for dinner all day. The chicken I had taken out the night before was almost fully thawed in the fridge. I wondered if either Matt or I had it in us to fabricate, make bread crumbs, dredge and cook chicken cutlets. Then I got the text from Matt: "I have dinner." Yes! Whatever it was, I was happy.

He came up the stairs carrying fried chicken that he made at work. "Ooh, can we have it with mac and cheese!?" I asked.

.....
Macaroni and cheese. A staple in a kid diet. We used to have that Velveeta mac and cheese dinner, with that squishy neon orange cheese pouch. It paired well with Minute Maid Berry Punch. But as I grew and my tastes evolved, I somehow came across Annie's Shells and white cheddar. That lovely purple box with the rabbit of approval.

I don't know when it was that I first had this uncommonly delicious food. But it was probably when I was babysitting kids with a mom who had good taste in dinner. Whenever it was, I became hooked. No more of that squishy pouch for me.

White shells and cheddar was mild but cheesily delicious. The shells absorb and hang onto the sauce. A little bit of butter, a little bit of milk and you have lunch, dinner, breakfast, snack. Didn't matter.

It was a staple for quick but wholesomey dinners. Burgers with a side of Shells and white cheddar? Dinner in your dorm room? Yes, if you can stand to cook the pasta on high for fifteen minutes, almost scald yourself trying to pour water down the drain, and not manage to drop it with the heat of the bowl. Don't ask me how I know that......It was the first thing I made for Matt in that early stage of dating.

Then something wonderful happened. Trader Joe's started selling Annie's microwavable Shells and Cheddar! In single servings! And it was good. A few seconds under the directed cooking time and you have a slightly al dente alternative to peanut butter crackers. The trick was to under cook it slightly and add slightly less water to boil. That made the sauce thick and cheesy and bold and delicious.

I tried a box of Velveeta Shells and cheese last November. Just to see how it was after all these years of purple box bunny goodness. It was kind of "Meh." After boxes of the Shells and Cheddar, Peace Pasta and Parmesan, and other delicious varieties, Velveeta just didn't compare. My favorite Shells and White Cheddar with half a cup of sweet corn. Holy goodness. Crisp, sweet yellow corn nestled inside the wee shells that are coated in white cheddar? You can't say no to that.

The Holidays are coming!

2010-11-01T17:34:00.001-04:00

Well, here it comes. The holiday season. Two months of non-stop commercials, sales, and general holiday ~~cheer~~ lunacy. For us in the food industry baking world, it means various degrees of kindness and patience from customers, ranging from "Oh, I totally understand that the pie wont be ready til 12! I can surely come later in the day." to "WHY CAN'T I HAVE A CHERRY PIE IN DECEMBER!!?!?? *click*" Ho! ho! ho! We've all been there.

.....Anyway.... It's great that it's going to be chilly and blustery, because all those warm and filling dishes can be made and frozen! With the crazy holidays coming up, hours are early and late. So I can do one of three things: Make things for the freezer, pick up whatever looks good at Whole Foods, or let Matt cook. Or! The secret fourth option: Going through Mcdonald's and wolfing down whatever it is I buy before I reach the first stop light out an letting Matt fend for himself.

Clearly, the first three are better. I love Matt's cooking, but I hate for him to cook a meal after he works all day doing just that. Whole Foods has amazing soups, pizzas, sides, sandwiches and all kinds of wonderful things to eat in a pinch, but if I'm getting out of work at 5pm after being there since 2 am, driving to a store would make me nutty and agitated.

But I enjoy the idea of making things ahead of time, I'm generally excited to make things for the freezer. Today, I'm going to make chicken and biscuits and a pot pie. The usual delicious half butter/ half shortening crust, lots of corn, (unpeeled) potatoes (or even better, sweet potatoes!), parsnips, peas, onions and celery.Possibly mushrooms. Some people may be content with a plain mirepoix and potatoes chicken pot pie, but I love my pot pie bursting with crisp vegetables. I'd put butternut squash in, if Matt would let me.

I admit it's a lot of work. Pulling the chicken meat (preferably a roasted chicken for that little extra something), chopping the vegetables, parcooking them, making whatever your crust preference is, and the nice delicious creamy filling (whatever you prefer. I'm a fan of half cream of whatever soup, and adding stock, cornstarch, and so many lovely spices).One tin of chicken and biscuits or a pot pie for two people means one main meal and lunch, plus a snack for each of us.
It's worth the 45 minutes of work on your day off to have zero effort on the day when you really can't bear to think about washing your hair, let alone chopping carrots.

I'm so excited for the cold weather. I love filling hearty meals. Best for the freezer, best for pulling from the freezer into the fridge and then into the oven after work. No mess, little clean-up, and 100% delicious and hearty. Cheaper than take out. Better than McDonald's.

I think next time I'll do a Shepard's pie, with sweet potatoes. My mother started making that a year or two ago with left over beef, and it's one of my most favorite winter meals. Peas, corn, beef, sweet potatoes! Yum. Or maybe some kind of pastry wrapped meat? Biscuits filled with ground beef and cheese? Or perhaps a veggie pot pie? So many delicious things and so little space in my freezer!

Reposting, Marshmallow Junkie

2010-10-23T18:11:00.001-04:00

I made chocolate marshmallows less than a week ago. It was an 8x8 baking dish, and they were very thick and damn perfect. They are almost gone, and I'm pretty sure I consumed about 80% of them. I am considering making more, and went to do a post about Marshmallows, my die hard addiction, and I forgot I did two years ago. So to hell with it! I'm re posting it. Isn't that what bloggers do? No? Oh well.

Marshmallow Junkie

Milk!

2010-10-19T18:33:00.002-04:00

I love milk.
Sometimes, I feel like milk is a wine, and pairs better with some meals more than others. Pizza and a salad? Not so much. Hearty beef strew and rolls? Heck yes!

I drank a lot of milk growing up.We're spoiled by good milk in this area. Stew Leonard's milk is full of body and mouth feel. I've found that when it comes to their milk, it is so fresh that each level percentage tastes like one level higher than it really is. Skim tastes like 1% and 1% like 2% and 2% is creamy, delicious and rich.

At some point in my pubsent life, we made a switch to skim milk (probably due to all that cultural pressure of 'healthy eating' and 'weight loss'). When it came to Stew's milk, I hardly noticed the difference, as it was still creamy and had a nice mouthfeel. But any other kind was just thin, watery and disappointing.

But I kept with the skim. God knows why. At school, we had fresh milk from a dairy fairly close by the school. The quality of the skim was still better than most brands. At school, we had skim milk dispensers and whole milk dispensers, which allowed a whole spectrum of milk fat deliciousness. Mostly skim with a shot of whole? Mostly whole with a shot of Skim? Half and half? Any combination was possible and adjustable to combat the potential heat of your lunch or dinner. And they were all fresh and creamy.

One classmate back in B-Block (early freshmen year) refused to drink the milk, because "it was shipped in bags.". It makes me laugh now, because I'm pretty sure most if not all milk in Canada is sold in bags.

Milk and I had an on and off relationship over the seasons and the years, which has comfortably settled into a familiar spot in my fridge.

Now to get out my soapbox here, because it's time for my stand on milk!

Milk contains numerous essential vitamins and minerals. Many of them are fat soluble, which means you can get the R.D.A of them about every other day or so and be healthy, because they are stored in your body fat. This is different from water soluble vitamins such as Vitamin C, because it gets used and flushed out of your body every day.

But it would also be safe to say to get the maximum absorption of fat soluble nutrients you need fat. So if I were to drink 1% milk and someone else were to drink the same amount of skim, I would be getting the most absorption from the nutrients. But whole milk shouldn't really be consumed by anyone over the age of 10, because no one older than a child should be getting that much saturated fat unless they are doing a Triathlon, or something. It's great for baking and cooking, but direct consumption? Not so much.

But as a woman, I feel like milk is important. Your body needs fat to survive. I'm not saying start taking shots of heavy cream, here. I'm just pointing out that skim milk is great, but 1% is even better.
The mouthfeel is much more satisfying, and there's only a marginal calorie and fat increase. I feel that it is worth the extra fat and calories. When it comes right down to vitamins and minerals, I'll take the few extra calories and the wee bit of fat anytime.

Dam Good Soft (and easy) Rolls

2010-09-12T19:31:00.001-04:00

...Matt told me to call them that. Because they "Create a dam for the gravy."...Anyway. I was looking for a quick pizza dough recipe, and the dough came out so tender and pillowy, I wanted to use the remaining dough for rolls. Which came out equally tender. So I wanted to share the recipe with additions of spices.

Dam Good Soft Rolls (or pizza dough)
1-- 1/4 oz package yeast
1 cup warm water
2.5 cups flour
3 tablespoons olive oil
1 tsp salt
3 tsp sugar
1 tsp garlic powder*
1 tsp onion powder*
2-3 teaspoons paprika (optional)*

* You can use any dried herb or spice you like, it makes the dough remain tender because it helps inhibit some gluten development. These just happen to be my favorite additions

Put the warm water in a medium sized bowl, sprinkle the yeast and 1 teaspoon of the sugar over it. Stir gently and let sit for ten minutes. The mixture should look creamy
In a separate bowl, mix the flour, remaining sugar, salt, and the spices of your choice. Mix into the yeast mixture along with the olive oil. Knead for a minute or two or until it forms a smooth ball.You may need more flour. the dough should be soft, pliable but not too sticky or too dry.
Let sit for 30 minutes, until it doubles in size.
Knead once more and you can begin to roll it for pizza, or divide for rolls. If using for rolls, let the rolls proof for another 15 minutes. Bake at 375 for about 15 minutes.
If using for pizza, roll out, top as desired and bake at 425 for 12-20 minutes, or until the bottom is golden brown and the cheese is melted

Roasted Vegatables

2010-09-10T18:48:00.001-04:00

For some people, Fall means sharpened pencils, homework, and the end of the beach. For me, it's roasted vegetables. Roasted vegetables and braised items. I could eat roasted vegetables every day. Especially if it contains sweet potatoes and broccoli. The sweet potatoes get crispy, caramelized and soft.
What happens to the broccoli I can't really describe. Its florets get crisped. The broccoli flavor condenses into an in-your-face broccoli flavor. It took me awhile to come around to broccoli. Maybe I wasn't ready for it's delicious broccoli flavor.

Parsnips is something I never ate until I reached school. Its first appearance was in beef stew, my top three favorite meal choices at school. Those perfectly batonette cut root vegetables. Savory beefy sauce. Beef braised to tender beefy perfection. Mashed potatoes. Warm dinner rolls. Oh yeah....Nothing better on a cold Hudson Valley November night than a bowl of beef stew from Skills Kitchen.

But I digress......

The parsnips looked like potatoes, especially when coated in beef deliciousness, so I was pleasantly surprised to discover a new root vegetable. To quote Matthew, "They taste like carrots if carrots didn't taste like carrots." Which I completely understood. Funny enough, it makes sense. It's light, rooty, and lacking beta carotene. Paired well when roasted with carrots and sweet potatoes.

Looking forward to roasting more root vegetables and the first braise of the season.

Bacon Fat, or Why I need to Check my Drafts on Blogger from time to time. 8/2009

2010-09-07T18:47:00.001-04:00

Back when I was trying to lose weight and be healthy , I would never have dreamed of using bacon fat. Now, being a little older, "wiser", and sick of trying so hard, I'm looking at it in a whole new light.
I've learned I eat in stages. Tuesday-Saturday I don't really eat all that much. I muddle through my day picking at cookies, cookie dough and the occasional bagel or iced coffee. It's an occupational hazard. That's what they don't tell you about the food industry; you are lucky to eat. (But I don't mind)
Sunday and Monday, however, I'm a bear. I can't stop eating.

Which brings me to bacon fat. I am obsessed. I love how it smells when first rendered from the bacon, I love its honey color when poured into a container, I love how it solidifies into a whitish gray mass that spreads easily onto bread for frying.

Last week, Matthew brought home some Italian Wedding Soup. I had been craving bacon, so we settled on BLTs and soup. I was shameless. Not only did I substitute fresh hot bacon fat for mayo, but.....I dipped a bit of the sandwich into said bacon fat. Just a corner. Just enough for a small bite. It wasn't greasy or oily. It soaked into the bread, making it moist and warm

I want to buy pounds of bacon to render, and strain it. I want to have Matt make Bacon Mayo out of it. For BLTs with Bacon Mayo, with bacon fat brushed onto the bread and pressed in a frying pan.

Eating in Secret

2010-09-02T16:20:00.000-04:00

Growing up, I lived on tuna. Almost literally. Tuna was second only to freshly pan fried chicken cutlets. But for the past few years, I've shunned tuna. Eating it in very rare circumstances. It is fishy, it can be messy. Evidence is difficult to hide. Being at school didn't help. I was weird enough, I didn't need tuna to make it worse.

Now that I'm living in an apartment with Matt, I've come out of the Tuna Closet. I have a few hours to myself after work, a perfect time to dabble in my tuna love.
Today after work, I blew off the gym, citing broken headphones. Also, I needed to get the half frozen chicken out of the fridge for dinner tonight. I was craving tuna.

Some people eat tuna sandwiches, sometimes they eat tuna melts. A few with crackers.
I enjoy tuna in all those forms, but my favorite way to eat it is with chips. Which I don't find weird at all. It's tuna on chips. But maybe stranger still is the best way to eat tuna. The most tasty combination of food, or at least top 20: Tuna and Doritos. It is cheesy, nacho-y and just plain good.

The Doritos were on sale last week, so with little thought, I bought them. And fixed tuna with the usual: salt, pepper, garlic/onion powder, barely enough lite mayo to bind. No celery, please. No celery ever. Top on Doritos and enjoy.

Tasty, tasty, tasty!
Okay, so I know that's weird. And shameful. And just kinda bizarre. But don't knock it till you try it!
I enjoy a good seared sesame seeded crusted yellow fin tuna (with an Asiany kinda sauce) as much as the next person, but tuna and doritos? Heck yes.

What's your dirty eating secret?

"I'm having a real gastronomical problem with this."

2010-08-22T20:29:00.000-04:00

Rabbit. Braised Rabbit.

The problem all started a week ago at Stew Leonards. We were doing basic shopping, when something caught my eye.

"Look, Matt! Rabbit!" I pointed. His face lit up.
"Rabbit!! Oooh! Rabbit! Can we get some, Jenni? Canwecanwecanwe!!??" He said, hopping up and down like a child begging for a puppy. In the middle of a busy Stew Leonards.
"Auhhhhhh....." I began.
"Pleeaassee!? Pleasepleaseplease! It's $4.99 a pound!!" He begged.
After much discussion, I agreed, and here I am, at the dinner table, staring at my forkful of bunny with trepidation.

The eight year old in me, the one who had a pet dwarf rabbit, is shocked and angry with me. I can see her surprise and disdain. The 24 year old is curious. How bad could it be?

Cut to a week later, and we're braising an effing rabbit.

The rabbit smelled wonderful as it braised during Return of The King. Savory, oniony and garlicky.

However, when I opened the dutch oven, there it was, "Hey! I'm a rabbit! Don't eat me!" Its headless corpse said.

I looked into the pot before we sat down. "Where's the cabbage?" I asked. The cabbage, which we settled on in the store this afternoon, was to replace the parsnips we both wanted but couldn't find.

Ten mintues later, the cabbage is sauteed and added, and we sat down to eat.
He served me a few pieces, along with cabbage and carrots. And sauce. I tore off a piece of bread and dip. Waiting, waiting, waiting.
Now, I know this is not sheep testicles, snake liver, or donkey nose. It is a rabbit. A little bunny-wunny. Real meat. What's my problem? I popped it. And chewed........

Okay, so the sauce isn't so bad. Salty, smooth, has a kick to it. But it has chicken broth in it, so I can't judge on the sauce alone.

Okay, now for the meat. Get a forkful, hold to mouth. Build up nerve and.... eat.

I chewed as it were glass.

"Well?" Matt asks, laughing at my expressions

"......It tastes like chicken thighs." I say. Looking down at my plate. Not really sure how I'm feeling about this. There is rabbit on my plate. And it tastes like chicken thighs with a little bit of gamey to it.

I manage to plod through my meal, managing to eat rabbit with a heavy forkload of cabbage. A vegetable I'm not even that fond of, for the record.

I set down my fork. "I'm having a real gastronomical problem with this." I sigh.
"Why? The rabbit?"
"Yes! I know it's rabbit, but it's really new to me and I'm finding it a bit weird. I mean, I ate veal cheeks, and bison heart and venison at school. And they were great, but this is rabbit." I say. "Rabbit!" I repeat for emphasis.
"This is ridiculous!!" I exclaim, "What if a professor or Chef from school was here, what would they say!"
"They'd say shut up and eat the damn rabbit." Matt smiled, and served himself a forkful of rabbit loin. He poked at it. "It's okay little Midnight!" He said to it, and burst out laughing. Thus joining the ranks of my uncles circa 16 years ago.
"I'm sorry! I couldn't help it, I had to say it!!" He choked out through laughter.

Now I'm sitting here and I've maybe had only five or six bites of rabbit.
What is my deal? Samwise Gamgee would have been proud to have such a nice supper! He and the other hobbits would sit around the pot with a loaf a bread and some ale and talk and eat until the last crumb was gone!

Guess I'm not cut out for rabbit, but the jury is still out.

Two Words: Maple Bacon

2010-07-16T19:44:00.000-04:00

The chicken was still too frozen. Which was okay, since roasted chicken with glazed carrots and a salad seemed too fussy for two people who had to go into work on a Saturday.

"Then what do you want to have for dinner?" I asked Matt. He poked around in the fridge aimlessly.
"Grilled cheese sandwiches?" He asked. A memory of finding Maple Bacon in the fridge this afternoon sparked my interest
"With Maple Bacon?" I asked
"Sure."
"And tomato?" (which turned out to not look too great)
"Sure."

I love bacon. Actually, I love bacon fat even more. On more than one occasion, I may have dipped my BLT directly into bacon fat, au jus style. The mouth feel of all the fat from the bacon, bacon fat and mayonnaise contrasting with the tomato and lettuce is so palette pleasing a Theasaurus would hardly do it justice. It is divine, sinful and the height of indulgence.

Add in maple bacon to that, and you have added sweet into that salt and fat. It is the ultimate of flavor contrasts: Sweet and Salty. The favorite favor of all kinds of people all over the world.

I discovered maple bacon in college. Matt and I had started dating and in the traditition of culinary courtship, we got together to cook meals together on weekends, as well as walk to the grocery store.

I believe the first thing he cooked for me with such an indulgence food stuff was Brussels Sprouts. It. Was. Awesome. One bite and I knew, I just knew I'd rarely have a bad meal with this man. He was my knight in bright chef whites.

Anyway, ~~bacon~~ back to the bacon.

I prepared Matt's grilled cheese and put it aside to get the pans heated up. I drizzled a liberal amount of bacon fat into my pan, while piling my grilled cheese with the remaining three slices of maple bacon, which was still shiny with fat, and crispy edges.

The bread absorbed the fat, and created a dark brown crust. The cheese melted all around the bacon, encasing it in white American (I know, I know, but I felt like going Classic, here. We can talk about how it is the bastard of all the cheeses later)

The grilled cheese was a diverse collection of melty, creamy, salty, sweet, crisp, soft and bacony gratification.

I don't even like bacon as a breakfast item apart from an egg sandwich. But when it comes to maple bacon and its fat, the possiblities are limitless.Cook eggs in it, saute vegetables. Round up enough and you can make bacon mayo, if you are so bold.

Sweet and salty. Is there anything it can't do?

Garlic Fingers and Onions

2010-05-07T17:17:00.000-04:00

I'm downstairs making garlic bread to go along with a cheese tortellini dinner, and my fingers smell like butter and garlic. Which makes me think of those stainless steel bars of "soap" used to remove strong odors of garlic, onions and fish. But, why? Why would one want to rub out that aroma of garlicky butter fingers. If you're about to walk down the isle, sure, stainless steel it up! *sniffffff* Ahhh, garlic! First date? If your date can't stand the smell of garlic, you're better off without them, anyway.

At work, I sometimes throw a day old seeded bread loaf in the oven, drenched with melted butter. For my slice, I channel my deceased grandfather and liberally shake Garlic Salt all over it. It is a punch of garlic AND saltiness in your face.

The only thing better than the smell of garlic is the smell of frying onions. Which sets off my Pavlovian reaction for a Pattie melt. One of my co-workers can't stand onions. When she first said it, I couldn't believe her. "All onions!? Red, yellow, cooked, fried!?" I was incredulous. Oh man, a life without onions?! I could practically eat caramelized onions with a fork and a beer. Actually......

Yoga

2009-12-20T17:44:00.000-05:00

"I do yoga in the bathroom sometimes" My friend commented, out of nowhere.
"What?"
"I do Yoga in the bathroom sometimes, at work." she clarified.
"How would you even do that? Wouldn't it be awkward if someone walked in?" I asked
"No, it's just a one person bathroom, for customers."
"And why would you be doing yoga in the bathroom?" I wondered
"Cause hiding out behind the vanilla cakes in the freezer isn't doing it anymore." Sam said.
I didn't say anything, as I was digesting this information
"My boss yelled at me today for a stupid birthday cake. The order didn't specify a color for the writing. It literally said "Any color. For Girl" so I just ask Tammy which color was already in a tube for a girl, you know, rather than dirtying a bag AND saving time. She turns on me and huffs "What does the FORM say!!!?" I tell her, and I know I caught her, and she tries to back peddle and make me look stupid. This is the third time this week." Sam says
"Oy vay." I commiserate, thinking on my Extern days, and icing cakes. I shuddered, thinking of my extern bosses.
"So she gives me this whole speech about forms and customers and stuff, and I'm pretty annoyed at this point, so I'm like 'Look Tammy, I'm sorry I asked that question, but it said the color didn't matter, as long as it was for a girl.' And she tells me I'm giving HER attitude. UGH!! It was just ICING, goddamnit."
"How big is the freezer?" I ask. The freezer at my extern was gigantic. Like a maze of speed racks.
"Pretty damn big. About half the size of the back of the bakery. We only bake cakes once a week and freeze them all. And brownies, cupcakes, cannolis, eclairs, that kind of stuff. Bagels."
"So, you just stand there and cool off?" I asked
"Pretty much. It helps. It saves me the trouble from walking out. It's usually minus 20. The Yoga helps more. Deep breathing, or whatever. My yoga teacher'd be pleased." She said
"I'm really glad I'm not a decorator. The ones on my extern were awful."
"I mean, she's really uptight for a vegan. Most them are kinda like hippies." Sam said
"Vegan." I said, with a snort. "How does she run a bakery that isn't all vegan? Is vegan even big in Oregon?"
"I don't know. It's just a rumor. Maybe she's just uptight in general. Really intense"
"New job isn't going so well, then?" I ask
"You have no idea. Tammy is uptight and crazy, the other decorators are just as crazy or as fed up as I am, the back baking manager is bitter in general, I get sexually harassed daily by the oven guys. I swear..." she said, finishing the sentence saying something that sounded dark in French.
"Oy vay." I said again.
"But you have to admit, this sounds pretty funny. I want to put it on my blog" I say, clicking open a new window to post.
"Wait, what?" She said
"This is too good. I can write a book out of complaints my friends have in the food industry. I need to write this down. I'll change your name and everything. Make you my cousin, or something. I need to get back into writing, and my friends tell me such good stories" I said
"Always writing, aren't you?" Sam said
"In my head, yeah." I said.
There was a pause.
"I hate her." Sam said, quietly.
"I know." I said. I knew she was chewing it over
"Okay, go ahead."

Disclaimer: Names, locations, and personalities have been changed to protect my good friend. This not a reflection of herself, or myself, as she was just telling me about a bad week, and I was too amused by "Yoga in the bathroom" to resist. Disclaimer.

Going to the City like a normal person

2009-12-07T17:12:00.001-05:00

I haven't written in months, and it bugs the hell out of me that I seem to start every post with that very same sentence.
I don't know why I'm feeling so unmotivated. I need a fresh perspective. A trip to somewhere warm with good food. I'm not even going to talk about ~~Thanksgiving~~. I don't feel like revisiting. I never know what to write about anymore. Sometimes I feel like I have a conspiracy going on against me. Big Brother is Watching, or something. Really, really puts a damper on anything interesting I might want to say. But maybe I'm just being crazy. Delusions of Grandeur or something. My life is pretty boring at the moment.
Or maybe I just don't have the heart anymore.

I visited my sister in the city yesterday. It made me feel incredibly normal. I know it's simple and silly for me to be excited about being so normal, but you know me. Normal for me is most certainly not normal for other people.

I saw her new apartment, which was cozy and cute, and checked out her neighborhood, which was overwhelmingly stuffed with restaurants, a meat market, and bakeries. A food lover's dream. If I lived near a meat market I'd never buy meat from Stop and Shop ever again.

We had lunch at Gina La Fornarina, a typically cramped place in the Upper East Side. It was jammed packed with people and servers in bright pink shirts. We managed to get seated quickly enough, I felt in the way and bulky as servers tried to bustle around customers waiting to be seated, their hands laden with delicious looking thin crust pizza, wine, and pressed sandwiches. Of course, everyone knows when a place is packed, it means the food is great. It was worth the bustle. Kelli and I shared a half of each of our pressed sandwiches. Kelli had a very tasty roasted veg and brie, and I had chicken salad. Both were light and crisp, but I preferred the veggie one over the chicken. The chicken was flavorful, but I like the flavor of roasted veggies and cheese. If I could get both kinds on one sandwich, that would have been perfection.

After we ate, we walked down to Two Little Red Hens, an especially adorable bakery. The front was tiny, but any NYC Realtor would call it "quaint." And it was. They sold mostly cupcakes and various cake sizes, along with a few cookies sold by the each. They also had a few pies. Everyone seemed nice and it looked like it would be so much fun to work at a bakery like that. But I'm not a city girl. Kelli and I shared a chocolate cupcake with white icing. It was moist and tender, and the ratio of buttercream to cake was just right. The white buttercream was smooth and fluffy.

The cakes were beautiful. The sizes ranged form 4 inches to about 8 inches. All kinds of flavors and combination. Even the pies looked nice. Even though I work in another bakery, I am not the kind of insecure person to bash every bakery I come across in attempts to make myself feel better. I'm sorry, I'm just not that kind of person. Also, I happen to try and appreciate every bakery in its own way. If someone is THAT insecure, they have serious issues.
It was a very cozy place to sit and eat. I would have loved to stay and buy several of the bite sized cupcakes so I would be able to sample them all, but when I'm with family, I tend to show a bit of restraint when I eat. If I were by myself or my boyfriend, I know I'd have sampled about half a dozen of the tiny cupcakes and sat there stuffing my face with every item I could.
The prices were that of what I would have expected at a bitty Bakery in the Upper East Side that was not only tiny, but delectable. Everything looked reasonable for what you were getting and how nicely it was decorated. I really am envious of people who have that skill. I lack it so badly I worry if I even belong in any bakery at all. I guess I ought to make that a Resolution of sorts, maybe take a class in the winter.

After the bakery, we hopped a subway into Midtown, where the contrast of Kelli's area and the center of the city was most obvious. You could barely turn around in the city, where as in Kelli's area you were pretty much free to walk around the streets without being run over by tourists with three diaper bags and a stroller.

Somehow we managed to get to Rockefeller Center, and to the Saks Windows. We perused the store, I was laughing at the handbags going for 2 grand, and the furs going for 5 grand, as well as a simple sweater going for $450. We hurried towards Grand Central ,where I hopped the train as close to the front as I could, and I was off for home.

I'm really looking forward to heading back to Kelli's apartment sometime soon, because every restaurant looked as good as the last and there were so many different types of cuisines I'd never get bored. And seeing my sister would be nice, too. :p

Pizza Frit

2009-07-28T16:57:00.007-04:00

When you're 6 and the idea of a pizza frit the size of your head is a reasonable feat. When you're 23, and the size is so massive it's not only bigger than your head, but spilling over the plate, it's nearly unfathomable how you will ever finish every bite.

This weekend was the St. Ann's Feast in Norwalk. My grandmother, for I'm not sure how many years, or even decades, was apart of the St. Ann's Club, and the fair was my most anticipated part of my summer. I remember rides, cotton candy, and massive puffy flats of fried dough drowning in sauce.
The smell of the raw dough as it touches the vats of hot oil makes me think of my grandmother in the back. Rolling out dough from an impossibly large batch, carefully frying it up, or saucing it. I'd get so excited when I saw her, waving enthusiastically and calling "Grandma! Grandma!" as she worked with ladies her age who looked familiar, but nameless. Nothing would tear me from that fried dough. Not cotton candy, not rides, not even the promise of going on a ride with my siblings, would make me give up that oily, incredibly messy sauced bread.
Fresh out of the fryer, it would be put on a plate and sent to the table across from it, where it would be powder sugared or sauced to order. Then it would be covered in parm if sauced and brought still screaming hot to my tiny 6 year old hands.

They were always so big. I was amazed at the size they would be able to roll them. It made me dream of my future as a baker.
We'd find a seat at the tables set up under tents, with the plastic table coverings. Usually we'd find an uncle or two, as they were usually milling about with their own fried dough. By the time you sat down, the smell of fried dough and hot oil had been following you into the parking lot, into the grounds, on line, and now, in your hands.
If you weren't hungry when you parked, you were hungry now.

Eating a pizza frit is somewhat of an acquired act. There's no right or wrong way, really, as any method results in requiring a dozen napkins. But no knives and forks allowed. No way. The method I've picked up over time is ripping out the crispy edges (The eye in a rib-eye, if you will), and dipping it in the cheesy sauce. You work your way around, ripping bigger and bigger portions to keep up with the soggy cooling dough.

By the time you reach the saucy center, which by now is most likely soggy and cool, your stomach tells you "I am STUFFED!", and begs for surrender. And your brain tells you "I don't think so. Keep eating."
You push the limits of your stomach with pizza frits. Too much is never enough. As good as it is burning hot and crispy, it is equally appreciated in its cool sog.

This year I am sorry to report that I could not finish my pizza frit. Matthew, who was the least Italian at our table, finished his before anyone. I feel like I barely qualify as Italian as it is, being only 1/4. The other 3/4s being Irish, German, and British (I believe. Perhaps there is a wee bit of French or Hungarian in there somewhere)

I feel like an intruder in my own dead Grandmother's Italian fair. But all cultures eat and are loud, so naturally I must belong. We eat, we drink, we talk, and we eat. A tradition of every culture I am apart of. From my grandpa's southern roots (and pulled pork; a food stuff I can eat in every way imaginable), to my grandmother's Italian ones; where it's really quite impossible to cook pasta sauce for four people or less.

But hearing all the familiar noises, the familiar tents selling Sausage and Peppers, pizza frits, ziti, pastries, and beer. And the tents selling a lot of chotzy stuff with Italian colors and stuff that screams " 'EY YOU! I'M ITALIAN!!!", made me feel at home and reminded me of my Grandmother. I probably have just enough Italian blood in me to pass as one at my local fair.

After we ate and sat with my uncle and his wife, my sister was wondering if the pastry stand had Italian ice, and if I had cash on me. We were in luck, because I did.
My sister, Matthew and I made our way through the hustle and bustle to the pastry stand. They were a simple set up, a drink case filled with pastries, and a large Pepsi tub filled with Italian Ice. An old man, an old lady, and possibly a grandson, no older than 13 were running the stall.
The boy filled the lemon Italian ice in small paper cups, stuffing it as full as he could, compressing the ice crystals to bursting. The tiny waxy paper cup was heavy with ice.

I began to lick at mine, squeezing the cup gently to break up the crystals after each taste. And the effect of the flavor and temperature was instantaneous. It was tart, cold, sweet and deeply refreshing. There were bits of lemon peel and one or two seeds. It was the faintest tint of yellow.
So many foods make up summer for me. Things I truly need to have to feel like I'm experiencing summer. Shaved Italian Ice at my grandmother's old Women's club festival is standard.

Foods like this make me nostalgic. I miss being young. I miss being young and on the rides. I miss eating a pizza frit and not worrying about it. I think above all, I miss being young and with my grandmother, back when she was younger, active, and the best pizza frit fryer the fair had.

Sesame Chicken

2009-06-11T15:02:00.006-04:00

I don't know a single person who doesn't like Asian food.

Matt and I had been craving it for a few days now, and yesterday we decided that it would be okay for us to go out to Fuji, in Darien. They reopened this year after a long renovation. I haven't been there since a surprise birthday party when I was 17, so I had been waiting for Matt to be around so I'd have someone to go with me.

For starters, this place has a sushi bar and a large hibachi area. It has all a large selection of Japanese and Chinese food. Anyone can find something they would enjoy.

At our last trip, I had Wok Seared Steak, while Matt had Tangerine Beef. They gave us this simple but pretty damn perfect bowl of onion soup. Broth and onions. Hot, savory, salty, perfect.

My steak was tender, sweet and savory and very good. A big portion, also. I could have done with more vegetables. But the steak was delicious. Matt's tangerine beef was sweet and crispy. Also a big portion and also could have done with more veggies.

Last night, Matt ordered the Chicken Katzu and I the Sesame Chicken. This time, they gave us Miso soup and an iceburg salad with that orange colored ginger dressing which is just so tasty and delicous, and I wish I knew the exact name and brand they use so that I may go out and buy a vat of it.
The simple Miso was hot and tasty, and served its purpose of waking up my appitite and satisfying Matt's hungry one.

I was getting excited for Sesame Chicken. The fried "Chinese" food is not something I let myself indulge in more than one a month, so when I really want it, I go for the good stuff, the kind in nice, clean and quality restaurants. Places like Fuji. I love the crispy, I love the sauce, I love the sprinkle of sesame seeds. It's addictive. And bad for you.
So when my plate came, piled and mounded high with the saucy crisp stuff, I wanted nothing more than to fall face first in my plate and not come up for air until it was medically necessary.

But I had chopsticks. Which would slow me down considerably, God help me.
As you probably know, I have fairly poor motor skills. So managing chop sticks is something I only get right about 1/3rd of the time. But, if you put it in perspective of weight loss, would slow me down enough so I wouldn't overeat.

I picked up my chopsticks and tried to nab a piece of chicken. My sticks pushed it around the mound before I finally successfully picked up a sauce drenched chicken piece. I actually was able to hold it long enough to make it to my mouth. And it was exactly as it should be: The sauce was thick, sweet, and slightly gingery. The chicken was moist, tender and crispy.

I was stil struggling to use my chopsticks properly. Matt placed my fingers in the right places. but I wasn't able to move my fingers in the right way. The waitress came over and asked if I needed a fork, or "kid's chopsticks" with a laugh. Teasing me in a friendly way, or what I hope was a friendly way. But I had too much pride to ask for a fork, or God forbid, the kid's chopsticks.

I kept eating my chicken slowly, but managing the chopsticks in a way that worked for me.
My rice was in a separate bowl, and easier to eat with chopsticks, bowl close to my face, and scooping with the chopsticks.

Matt's chicken katzu was a large portion, probably two cutlets, piled on top of each other. His rice and sauce was in separate bowls, and somewhere under the pile, was some broccoli.

The chicken was crisp and light; Matt's only complaint was that it was fried in the same fryer as fish probably was.

As we ate, the Hibachi table had a family. The Hibachi table is something I'd like to experience with everyone at work, because the chefs are not only friendly and outgoing (and handy with sharp objects and things that flambe), but also use severely outdated lingo, which is hilarious to me; "Go! Go! Power Rangers!!". "Who let the dogs out!?" "This is the bomb!", etc.

My overall opinion on Fuji is the portions are large when it comes to meat; both times we've eaten there we've both gotten large portions of meat. But if you're like me, who likes copious amounts of vegetables with her Chinese, or like Matthew, who likes a decent portion, I suggest asking for extra vegetables. I'm sure they will be happily accommodating with any such requests.

Overall Info

Dress Code- Casual/Dressy Casual
Price Range- Apps- 10+ Entrees 10-25+, Hibatchi 16+
Menu- Varied; There are many Japanese, Chinese and a few Curry items to choose from
Service- Good
Good for anyone; dates, familes, parties

Dundee

2009-06-10T14:30:00.001-04:00

"Give me something to write about."
"Spam." He said. I rolled my eyes.
"No. Try again."
"Lightbulbs. No! Specialization"

I had two beers tonight, and feel like writing while I still feel uninhibited. None of Matt's topics interested me. So I'm writing. About whatever.

But right now I'm going to blog about this beer. Dundee Honey Brown. The honey part had sold me initically. But then I got a good look at the label. A quirky bee, with a band drum, and a pint. In love. I love the 'beat of your own drum" ideal. Then I read the back of the label:

"What's supposed to go in beer? German purity law say you're only allowed four ingredients. But this is America....The land of civil disobedience, and footballs that don't roll like the rest of the world wants them to. So we decided that for Dundee Honey Brown we'd add a fifth~ a touch of pure honey. Granted, that's a little different. But we figure you can be like everyone else or you can be yourself and drink something unique."

Ain't it the truth? This beer, my friends, is me. It's me. From the quirky bee, to the differentness. And I am sold.
I'm looking at the other brews, and am delighted by the quirkyness. I am looking forward to getting a craft sampler this week.
...........

Oh, and the beer is pretty tasty too.

Here's what the site has to say about their wheat beer: "Senator Joseph McCarthy. The Hollow Earth Society. Members of the Spanish Inquisition. All convinced they were blessed with the gift of clarity. And proof that clarity might be overrated."
Am I a little weird to be sold by beer with quirkiness. Maybe. But I think I'm okay with that. But I dig beer that's just mellowed out. Beer that doesn't take itself too seriously. Or too loosely. I'd never drink a Bud, or a Coors, or a Miller, or whatever watered down crap mass America tends to veer to. Mass produced crap isn't my bag.

Something like Dundee speaks to me.

Wholefoods Excursion

2009-04-06T13:21:00.002-04:00

I woke to a wet and miserable day, but I felt excited with anticipation. Today I was going to Wholefoods.

I finally arrived at about 11, just as it began to drizzle. I nearly tripped on the curb. But I was there. When I walked in, a display right at the entrance caught my eye. For a second, it looked like a cheese rind, and I thought it odd to display cheese (unless it was hard) in such a food safe inappropriate way. But it was just "bulk soap" at 14.99/# Bulk Soap. Bulk. Soap. I've always loved the word "bulk" Bulk candy, especially. The soap smelled wonderful, but I was overwhelmed with colorful fruit and good smells.
Instinctively, I began in the middle, before turning and doublebacking to my right, where one end of the store was. It was prepared foods, the bakery, salad bar, hot food bar, deli, and such. Wonderful smells of foods of different countries of origin wafted to my nose and surrounded me with deep feelings of warmth, comfort, and disarmed willpower.
When I was wandering back to the main part of the store, looking at packaged stuff that I wasn't sure was local, organic, or whatever ("Everyday Marshmallows"? Did you open a bag of Jet Puft anbd put them in a plastic box?). I saw the soup again, and finally saw the types of the day. I saw "Roasted Corn Chowder" and was sold.

I kept wandering aimlessly and shyly, as if I'll be caught: "Hey! She's an impostor! A non vegan isn't allowed to buy SOY NUGGETS! Get her OUT!!"

After wandering isle after isle, I ended up with popcorn cakes, local BBQ sauce, Annie's dressing, soy nuggets (YESSS!!!!), corn, Kashi kid's cereal and my soup.

With my aimless walking, I passed by the Bulk isle several times, and finally stepped into the great mecca of whole food. What first caught my eye was JELLY BEANS! I looked at the ingredients, and they were all natural. What caught my eye second was the price: 7.99/#. Wow, okay, just going to get a sprinkle here. I was a little surprised to see the jelly beans. The night before, I had wondered what I planned on getting at Wholefoods, as I didn't exactly have a list. My reaction was "Jelly beans." And there they were.
Then, I saw diced dried pineapple. at 2.99/#, which seemed pretty reasonable. It then hit me: I can make my own granola mix!!! I got dried papaya, and the highest protein granola I could (something with soy in it.)
When I first walked into the isle, I saw bins of peanuts. For peanut butter, apparently. For people to grind at home? How odd. Then I noticed it was fresh ground peanut butter! Seeing Honey roasted peanuts for grinding, I could not resist.
I flipped on the switch and heard the grinding and peanut butter ooozed out. I ground my OWN peanut butter!! It was insanity. And very tasty: gritty and just a little sweet, and peanutty.

After walking up and down the isle, hoping I didn't miss anything, I decided I was here much to long and headed to the checkout....but first, some crusty bread for my soup? Or perhaps a salad?
I opted for a salad, with a tong of romaine, and a tong of spinach, and a spinkle of mixed greens.

I grabbed one of their big Wholefoods bags and got in line, after I was checked out (being sure to actually pay for said bag) I got into my car a few seconds before it began to pour.
I couldn't wait another second. I found my bag of just a sprinkle of jelly beans and popped one in my mouth.
My reaction was instantanous: The shell was thin and gave away easily. The jelly was sweet, and the flavor tasted like it came from an actual fruit. I can only distingush two or three flavors, but I am sold on these 7.99/# jellybeans. They are very much worth the hefty price tag. Also, they are the small jelly bean sized, so you get more bean for your buck. They taste a little like the gormuet jelly beans we used to get at Easter at Stew Lennords, but all natural.

I drove home in the rain, and heated up my soup, and put my new honey mustard dressing over my salad. The soup was full of corn, potatoes, onions and peppers. It was creamy, warm and delicious on a wet gray day.

All in all I spent about $35, but everything thus far has been tasty and well worth it (well, except for the pop corn cakes, as I was expecting something like rice cakes...but they are tasty when dipped in BBQ sauce). I'm looking forward to another excursion very very soon.

I am considering going back just for the jelly beans Tuesday.

Hollow Leg Syndrome

2009-03-28T13:33:00.006-04:00

It's the start of a new season. So, of course, as usual, I am starving.
Whenever a new season starts, well, at least the transition from cold to colder and colder to warmer, I feel like I can't consume enough calories.

I'm not scarfing down nearly as much as I usually do. I think when winter started I inhaled hundreds (if not a thousand) of extra calories a day. But it was much different then; Last winter, I was, of course, up to my elbows in overtime. Working a normal day of 12 hours and my longest day being almost 18. So I hardly noticed when I had a second or third (Who am I kidding, how about 'fifth or sixth') chicken finger or some other kind of bad for you, trans fat laden fried food (I remember leaving work at 5:30 pm, after being there since 3 am, and getting several items from Mcdonalds and scarfing it down before I even reached the highway).

But at the same time I could really stand to shed a pound or five. I made the grave mistake of trying on a pair of jeans at Old Navy, and they barely went past my knees! They were my size, but their jeans have never really fit me since I hit puberty and they have so many different styles, a size is never the same size in each style. Still, it made me so depressed I very nearly bought Soy Nuggets at Trader Joes....Which I'm kind of considering getting...Mmmm...soy nuggets with Bbq sauce......Really! They are really quite tasty!

Anyway....I've been eating a lot of jelly beans, and crackers and cookies and I really wish I had better will power. Maybe I should chew gum, drink more water, or do something to control my eating habits. I can't wait for nicer weather, and warm days so I can go for more walks and feel like I'm taking control of my health.

While it may cost a little more, I really ought to invest in foods that are actually sort of good for you, like minimally processed items: preservative free/cane sugar granola bars, grainy cereal, even soy nuggets. The kind of stuff one finds at Trader Joes. And drinking green tea. More salads. Less junk.
I say that. I've said that in I don't know how many posts. But this time, while I may fall of the horse and fail, it's almost summer, and it's going to be a busy one, and if I want to look good and have energy, I need to make changes now.

Cadbury creme filling fizzle.

2009-03-25T19:53:00.006-04:00

Cadbury creme eggs don't hold the same appeal as they used to. I'd buy a dozen and eat one a month till the next Easter (which I might do again this year, just for kicks).

But now I'm nibbling at one, and I don't feel like I love it as much as I did. The ooblecky tacky filling is creamy and thick and sugary, which is tactfully(?) pleasing. The mild milk chocolate that melts with it adds another depth of flavor and sweet.

The orangey yolky center that marbleizes with the rest of the white rouses feelings of nostalgia, and I love the way it melts on my tongue, but it fails to light the fire that burned in my soul for candy like it used to.

Maybe it's because I'm 23, and appreciate the Slow Food Movement, and organic and local and stuff made in small batches, and those small companies (all of the above in certain situations, of course). A Cadbury creme egg that is now owned by Hershey isn't going to do it anymore. I like things like potato chips made by some company in Idaho, or cane soda, or produce from a farmer's market or naked beef from Stew Leonards.

I guess I'm sort of a food snob......... But not really. I just like to eat a variety of delicious things, and a variety of junky food. But if I'm going to eat something that tiny that has 150 calories, I damn sure am going to thoroughly enjoy every mouthful.

.....But I guess I do savor every little bit of that tiny egg. It's chocolate, it's creamy fondant (one of my most favorite things..in the bakeshop there were buckets of it and I would sneak it all the time) and it's seasonal. It was apart of my childhood, and sometimes things like that makes you feel good and happy in a way that nostalgic things do; it satisfies a tiny part of your soul.

Sunday Breakfast

2009-03-01T08:46:00.005-05:00

Today I planned on waking up early, making coffee and just enjoy having the first floor to myself before my siblings woke up and my parents came back from being away.

I had decided since I didn't get my sausage biscuit from McDondalds at Matt's Graduation, that would be what I would make.

It took me awhile to settle on this idea. As I would have to run out and get. sausage. But I decided I'd settle on bacon if we had Bisquik. We didn't have any Which meant I'd have to run to Trader Joes. So I might as well get the Morning Star vegan sausage patties there as well, (don't knock it, they look good and their Griller's Vegan tastes like a hamburger) because I've yet to see real sausage patties at Tjs, and it would be an acceptable alternative.

When I got there, I went to the frozen section and located the Morning Star area. They had the burgers (good with chipole mayo), the "buffalo wings" (Why?), the bacon, and the sausage links. But no patties. Surely this was some kind of mistake. I lifted every box, hoping for a stray sausage pattie. But there were none. Given, it was about 5:30 pm, but surely they restock?

I would have been more annoyed, if I weren't so amused by the irony.

I picked up my box of multigrain baking mix and wandered, thinking about my next move.
But after browsing the bacon, and the soy-sauge, I finally left with Baking Mix, Home Browns (the hash brown style found at Mcdonalds), a box of Vanilla cookie Trader Joes Oreos, and Whoopee pies (the last two being a compulsive move). Damn you Trader Joes for enticing me to veer from my list and buy another item!!!

This morning I woke up at 7, my head thick and my vision blurry. I got up and laid on the couch, watching an infomercial for "YOUR BABY CAN READ" because I was too thick with tired to change the channel...even with the remote sitting at my head.

Finally, I willed myself off the couch to prepare a caffinated crystal light packet, which brought me around a little bit, enough to start making my breakfast.

I brushed three hash browns with oil and threw them in the still cold oven, and turned it on. I formed my cold, last night prepared biscuit dough into three rounds and put them aside. After putting the bacon into the oven, I got my eggs ready.

Once the bacon came out, swimming in its own fat (Mmm, bacon fat, could there be any better fat?), I poured a little of the remaining bacon fat into the pan intended for my eggs. This was something Matt always did when we would cook breakfast together on the weekend. But I suppose when you're eating the bacon with the eggs, you can't really tell that the fat is in it, but I like the concept anyway.

My entire breakfast came together nicely. My coffee was pleasant enough, better than at work, but my biscuits rose a bit too much to accommodate eggs, cheese and bacon into an open mouth. The bacon was crispy, and my hash browns crunchy.

I'm still tired, and now very worried, because I just found a letter for myself from I don't know when about my other student loan, which was due YESTERDAY, so I want to run to the post office, but am trying to make myself realize it doesn't matter when I go, because there's no post today anyway.

I don't know what the deal is with people trying to make breakfast fancy. All you need is a little breakfast meat, some bread, a potato product and an egg, and you have a very Americanized breakfast. Fatty, greasy, bad for you, but once in a while it is entirely delicious.

Pop Tarts

2009-02-15T21:32:00.007-05:00

The first (and only) rebellious thing I ever did as a college student was buy S'mores pop tarts.

We never were really allowed pop-tarts growing up. The non-frosted fruit ones were barely allowed for breakfast as it was, so chocolate or frosted anything was certainly out of the question. We were strictly a strawberry or blueberry kinda family.

For some illogical reason, in my mother's eyes, the Toaster strudels were a better option, perhaps because there was marginally more fruit filling and they were warm/flaky with a cream cheese icing. But they are essentially the same thing.

I jealously coveted the other flavors, like chocolate, S'mores and the weird berry flavors of the time. Even raspberry frosted with sprinkles was off limits.

I sometimes dreamed of all the food I wasn't allowed to have growing up. All the food I could buy when I was on my own (candy, sugary cereal and possibly Kid tv dinners). I clearly remember when I was very young being in a car with my mother, driving in Rowayton, and saying how I was going to buy bags of candy when I was on my own. "Oh yeah?" She said, "You'll look like this." And puffed her cheeks, which made me laugh.

So, the first week I settled into college, I went shopping with my roommate, or perhaps a new friend. We were wandering down the cereal isle, and packages caught my eye. Pop Tarts! No, wait! S'mores pop tarts!!! I snatched a box, and tried to justify the purchase to whomever I was with, because I felt silly buying food intended for children.

When I got back to the dorm, I opened the box and peeled open the sliver package eagerly. I inhaled the graham crackery scent, the crackly chocolate frosting, and signed contently. It smelled so good. Finally, I took a bite.
It was sweet and different. Vertical stripes of chocolate and what appears to be marshmallows. It was slightly gooey.

It was an affordable luxury, 2/$3. But I didn't buy them again. Being a college student, I worried about money and saving it for school supplies and substantial food.

But now that I am a college graduate with a job, I've found other affordable luxuries. But I still like Pop Tarts.

Recently, I've found Pop-Tarts with whole grains. Shockingly, they come in Chocolate Fudge. Which is a chocolate pastry, with fudge, with chocolate frosting. With whole grains. And Fiber. Surely this counts as a breakfast item when paired with a fruit smoothie. I like these better than the S'mores one, unfortunately, to write this post, I went out and bought a 12 pack of S'mores pop tarts (Always a deal finder, I bought them on sale, they were $1.74!) So, I'm stuck with a lot of Pop-tarts. Which I'm either going to try to be okay with, or maybe unload some on my boyfriend.

$6 Budget

2009-02-13T15:21:00.002-05:00

I've decided to allot myself between 6-$7 a month for whatever I feel like eating. It could be anything from Mcdonalds, Duchess, diner, Wendys or Chinese. Even those marshmallows at Tj Maxx. Whatever little treat I'd like.

I decided to do this because, I thoroughly enjoy fast food and other takeout, but never really wanted to put forth the effort of procuring it. Also, I thought whatever I spent on it would eventually add up to other, more useful things, like fuel, clothes, and groceries.

But I think a little splurge now and then probably wouldn't hurt. And, if I let myself have a little something now and then would probably keep me focused on being healthier. If I let myself have that little budgetary splurge, I am probably less likely to use it.

I'm allowing myself to spend this money in any amount I like, whether I do it about 5 times at 1.12, or twice a month at about $3.

Or maybe that should be spent on something more splurge worthy. Like candy or all natural shampoo from Trader Joes (I am quite fond of "Christopher's Jellies")

So, we shall see how this works out. I already spent $4 and some change at Wendy's the other week, so I'll have to wait till March to invest a little cash in a little splurge that makes stuff like 4 mile walks, fruit smoothies, and Emergen-C more bearable.

Butterscotch pudding

2009-02-01T20:13:00.002-05:00

I had a sudden craving for butterscotch pudding sometime earlier last week. I had seen a top comfort food list on AOL, and butterscotch pudding topped it.

I was a fan of all things pudding growing up, but butterscotch was my favorite. I have vauge memories of sitting on my very old and handed down Whinnie the pooh blanket, Swiss Miss Butterscotch pudding in hand and watching Raffie on Nick Jr, as a very wee one. So when I saw a recipe for it, I was excited.

I remembered the deep butterscotch flavor (which is hard to describe), the brownish orangish color. The smooth consistency. I was craving it enough to go make it that night.

But, I set my expectations too high, I am sorry to say. The recipe was simple, consisting of heavy cream, whole milk, brown sugar, cornstarch, butter and vanilla. It came together well and I like the consistency of the pudding, but the flavor was absolutely lacking.

I'm disappointed. I should have added more vanilla and brown sugar, because, now that I look at the recipe, called for dark brown sugar,and we've been a light brown sugar kinda family. Maybe that was the case. My mother makes her own vanilla, and it's only been sitting for a few months, so maybe I should have added more.

I personally, did not like the pudding. I'd make it again, but modify the recipe for more sugar and vanilla. So let this be a lesson. When something calls for a particular crucial ingredient, you should really use it. Light brown sugar isn't a substitute for dark brown sugar, and next time I'll have to remember that.

S+P Oyster Company, or "Top Ten Meals of My Life (so far)"

2009-01-13T13:14:00.017-05:00

When Matt and I walked out of the planetarium at Mystic Seaport, it was snowing. Which wasn't at all a big deal, I wasn't altogether concerned about it until I began to drive in it. I realized later on I'd be driving in it, and hoped the plow would have gone through by the time we went out to eat.

Matt and I weren't sure where we'd go for dinner. He had seen a nice looking place up on a hill we'd try out. By the time we were ready to go, it was still snowing, and wet and a little icy.

I got into the car and stated that I was nervous about driving. Here I was, in an unfamiliar town, in the dark, in the snow, in heels. And I didn't exactly know where I was going. Ookay! We slowly made our way to the alleged restaurant on the hill. It turned out to be a restaurant at the Mystic Inn, which appeared to be closed. I went up the windy, snow covered hill to discover this.

Now where do we go? I'd sooner eat takeout from a fast food place than drive around blindly. But we decided to drive around a bit, I was sure something would turn up in this cute town.

Out of the dark snowy night, I saw twinkle lights on a housey building on the water (like a beacon from God!). A restaurant! Quick decision! I turned in.

It was the S+P Oyster Co.! We parked and glanced at the menu next to the door. It looked good, I barely needed to read it to find a few things I'd like. We made our way in and got a table. It was a little quiet, but full. Dim, but not too dark. The atmosphere was comfortable. The menu was full of seafood, meats and pasta.

Our server, Robin, came to us and wrote her name on the white paper covered table with a pen. Which I thought was an interesting way to get your name across.

Matt and I ordered wine (Sav Blanc, Root one) while we looked at our menus (I was seriously considering a drink drink, but then decided I'd probably be better off with wine). I finally decided on pork tenderloin medallions with apples and rosemary, mashed potatoes and green beans. Matt got a broiled seafood plate. I can't really comment on that, since I am not one for shellfish. Sorry, New England.

My wine was summer. Peachy, crisp. It was summer in a snowstorm.

When our meals came, I had to take a picture. I begged Matt for his camera, and finally he obliged . I picked up my fork and cut a small sample of the pork. And was lost in a food daze. I put down my fork.
This is too good to eat." I gushed. So, I picked up a crayon and began taking notes. Shamelessly. I took short worded notes, that are illegible to me now. I ate slower than I ever have, savoring and experiencing every tender bite of my meal. I gushed and was completely absorbed in my meal. I could barely talk to Matthew or even acknowledging that he was even eating with me, until I suddenly snapped back into reality and asked him how his meal was. He said he liked it, and pointed out a few things ideas he liked and wanted to remember to borrow them when he opened his own restaurant at some point in his life after graduation. (Ooh! I forgot to mention the bread with an olive oil balasmic dip; an idea he wants to borrow, along with a few other things...that I don't remember)

He also gave a look around. "You know," he said "I can see a few reasons why this is a great restaurant."

"How?" I asked, so enamored with my meal I wasn't aware of anything past my plate and glass of wine (which was- and I'm quoting myself "A pair so perfect not even God could wish for anything better"...But maybe I just have low standards when it comes to wine pairing. If I don't shudder at every sip, I consider it a good pair...Actually, I fall in love pretty easily with any crisp Sav Blanc)

"Well, it's snowing, the economy is terrible, it's the slow season and there's only three or four empty tables." He said. I looked. It was true. The restaurant only had a few tables open. And more people kept coming in.

I nodded, commenting how this is a great restaurant and how glad I was that we happened upon it (and really, isn't that how you find the best places to eat? The stuff blogs are made of) Then I went back to my meal.

I was agonizing over what was in the sauces. I knew one was garlic and possibly shallots, and the other was bright orange, sweet and slightly citrusy. Matt figured it was oranges, but I wasn't sure. All those different flavors on one plate? I had no idea what it was, only that somehow, it went with everything. My greenbeans were crisp and cooked just how I like them. My potatoes were dense and tender, the pork, sweet and savory, perfectly cooked and balanced in flavors. (I was worried there'd be too much rosemary, an herb I've come to dislike with my mother's overzealous use in past meals)

It was surely the best meal I have had in a long time. Probably top ten meals of my life (at this point in time). I was engrossed and enamored in it.

I still needed to know what was in the mashed potatoes! It had this sweet to them that I could not put my finger on. When Robin came by to see how everything was, I asked her what was in them. She replied quite smartly with the standard ingredients (half and half, butter, milk, salt, pepper) and "something else they wont tell us" Lies!! You know you know whats in them! I'm sure it's apples. I'm sure it is. It's something I wouldn't expect, yet logical. I also loved the fact that she told me they piped them. Because I already knew that. I wanted to say "I swear I'm not an insane foodie! My boyfriend and I have degrees from the CIA and I swear I'm not that nuts!!!" But I didn't.

I finished my last few bites and sipped the last of my wine. Matt asked me if I wanted dessert.

"Do you want dessert?" I replied, knowing the answer.

We got dessert. He got bread pudding and I got Tiramisu.

I wasn't disappointed. It was mousse like: creamy, airy, light, but full bodied in flavor. I began to gush again. I can barely put this into words. Usually I gulp down food and dessert. But this meal made me stop and slowly savor each and every bite.

It took me an hour and a half to eat two courses. I barely was aware of time. I was barely aware of anyone. I was aware enough of my boyfriend to have conversations, but it was mostly me gushing over my meal.

Apparently, the bread pudding was quite tasty as well, in case you were wondering. The bread appeared to be processed into breadcrumbs, and lended itself to a more pudding like texture. I'm not one for bread pudding, but if I was, I'd probably prefer it made this way.

So, after an hour and a half of gastronomical pleasure, we left. I carefully ripped my notes off the table and stuffed them in my purse. Matt teased me, saying if I wanted to be a writer of such things, I'd need to learn how to remember everything. But personally, if there are in fact crayons and paper on the table, I'm sure as hell going to use them.

I was so glad we happened upon this restaurant. I couldn't dream of a better meal or a better place to go with my boyfriend. I know not many people read this blog who are also happening to go to Mystic, but if you are in Mystic, you have to have a meal here. I can't say much more than that.

S+P Oyster Company
Dress: Casual/dressy casual (But I wore a dress and heels, and I didn't feel out of place in them)
Price: Moderate, with entrees starting at about $12.95 up to about $30.
Food: Excellent
Service: Also quite excellent. I liked that Robin, our server, knew some locals who sat near us and asked if they wanted their usual. (I dig that stuff)
Menu Selection: for a seafood place, great. Enough for seafood affectionato, but a land lover would have plenty to choose from.
Right on the water, so it's very pleasant and pretty, especially when its snowing

See the perfect cookedness of the pork? The color of the red potatoes? (AH-HA!!! Could it possibly be CHICKEN STOCK!!!? Edit: Matt told me probably not.) The Apples!!? Perfection on a plate. OOh! Oooh! And I got a green bean surprise under the pork. It made me happy. =)

Mystic, and S+P Oyster Co

2009-01-12T18:31:00.000-05:00

Went to Mystic with the boyfriend, more on that and the best meal I have had in QUITE awhile coming up later.

Saltines

2008-11-03T15:37:00.005-05:00

Saltines hold a special place in my palette. Cheap, crispy, bland and available everywhere. I wasn't one for Ramon noodles, so saltines became my cheap source of sustenance my last year or two of college. I'd buy boxes of them and eat sleeves at a time with store brand root beer or a water bottle filled with juice pilfered from the dining hall.

I don't know what their appeal is. They are a simple carbohydrate with a nice salty and crackery flavor. They have a slight flake in their layers and are drier than most crackers. The only real appeal is cheapness and saltiness. Nothing but soup goes particularly well with them, can't really serve it at parties and they crumble.

But I like them. When I pick up my mother from work (Admin of a elderly living facility) I'll head straight for the kitchen and shamelessly pick a few small packages of saltines from the massive box. I get this uncontrollable craving for carbs. I start off with two or three, and then all of the sudden I'm on my fourth and fifth package and drinking cranberry juice and shoving handfulls of garlicky croutons in my mouth as well. I like this brand of saltiness in the kitchen; they have this slight cheese taste that I can't exactly identify.

Maybe I shouldn't be investing in a few boxes right now. I've been going on eating binges as of late (McDonald's double cheeseburgers, bags of candy and the aforementioned Saltines).

When I went to Shaws today I got Nature Valley crunchy oat bars, baby carrots, cukes and honey mustard dressing, so hopefully that, and developing a taste for bananas (or at least getting to the point where I don't deeply gag when I eat one), will make me feel healthier and not feel like a big fat Tina.

And now for something completely different.

2008-10-30T19:56:00.003-04:00

more animals

Mr. Paranoid of the Ocean Guy

Broccoli Stir Fry, Take Two

2008-10-27T12:35:00.002-04:00

A few weeks ago I tried to make my own broccoli lunch. I went out and got all these Asian sauces with high hopes that it would be delicious as the take out stuff. And much, much cheaper.

But it was a disaster.

The sauce was god awful (bean sauce which was thick and smelled funny) and my broccoli was undercooked.
So this weekend I decided I'd have another go at it. I would buy a standard Teryaki this time and make it right.
I ended up buying Ken's Steakhouse Sesame and Ginger Asian Salad dressing. Which smelled amazing. I reduced it a little and after I steamed my broccoli, I added it to the pan with the sauce in it to let it coat and reduce.

What I got was overcooked broccoli in deeply acidic sauce. Very disappointing. I could only eat a few bites before I couldnt' eat anymore.

Next time I'm going to buy the sauce my boyfriend and I used when we used to cook stir-frys. It's bright red and mostly full of fake stuff, but at least it's sweet and tasty.

Gimmie a break!

2008-10-24T19:42:00.004-04:00

I'm a little addicted to Kit-Kat bars. I don't eat them very often, but when I do, I could eat twenty of those wafer sticks coated in chocolate and it wouldn't be enough.

I bought about 9 bucks worth of candy at CVS today (I had a $7 Extra Care Cash coupon, and thought 'What the hell?'). Two bags of fun sized Kit-Kats, a bag of Rolos and a bag of Yorks.

And I plan on buying more.

I think I've eaten half the bag of Kit-Kats already. You only get two sticks per wrapper, which no longer accommodates my 23-year old sized mouth (as a child, those fun size bars or candy in general took ages to savor). Two sticks can be stuffed in my mouth and gone in 30 seconds. (Damn American who doesn't enjoy her food! In Russia, we don't even have food!)

Kit-Kats are another of the extremely palette pleasuring foods. We all adore that mouth feel of opposite textures (and flavors), and Kit-Kat combines creamy with crispy. Genius.

I'm a big fan of crispy. Any kind of crispy. Chicken, fries, onion rings, veggies, candy. I'd be interested to see if that's some very deep Caveman instinct (much like gaining weight in winter and avoiding bitter tastes), or just because it's so damn pleasurable. I can barely describe it.

"Crispy" is associated with "Deep fried, golden brown and delicious", another one of my favorite things. But is that the real reason why I so love it? Deep fat fried crispy goodness of well done fries? But I love Nestle Crunch Bars, too. And Butterfingers. And anything else with layers of wafers or otherwise.

But why? I'm baffled as to why all these mouth feels bring such pleasure. We love creamy, crunchy, gooey, soft, hard, tender, crispy, smooth, sandy....Do they spark feelings of nostalgia? Do they release Happy Chemicals to your brain?

I think eating in general makes you feel happy inside. Especially good food. Or things you love to eat despite its quality (like my weird eating habits post). I don't think it matters if it's crispy like a Kit-Kat, creamy like Risotto, tender like a steak, or gooey like a Valo-Milk. I think pleasure from eating is one of those Ancestorial instincts that came about when humans realized that some foods tasted good and made you feel good.

There's no real reason for it. I think food just makes us happy.

91st post (!!!)

2008-10-01T14:51:00.006-04:00

Post 91!? Really!? Wow. I'm kinda impressed with myself.

So, I brought my smoothie to work today. But I left it in the car, and by the time I realized it, it was down pouring rain outside. But I wanted it!! So I ran out there, splashing in puddles and getting damp rapidly and then back to the bakery, rain dripping from my hat.

My smoothie actually came out pretty good. I used almost all frozen fruit: blueberries, a few mango chunks, a little pineapple, and a fresh banana. I added orange juice and in the morning I put in some Instant Breakfast. Since I didn't feel like getting a blast of fruit at 5 am, I ate one of those Fiber One toaster pastries (they were tasty, better than a normal pop-tart)

All I could really taste was pineapple, with a little banana in the background, as well as something I could only identify as tropical.

Although I probably got in about three servings of fruit, a packet of instant breakfast (full of good stuff) AND a multivitamin, all before 8 o'clock, I sabotaged myself throughout the day: a small snickers bar, a blt for lunch, a few swallows of Pepsi and eating one of the new cookies I had made today (pumpkin with cream cheese icing[which are delicious]), also, when I returned home I ate a a small package of cheese and crackers.
But I'm kind of okay with that. I'll make another smoothie tomorrow. Maybe every day. It would keep me on track: fruit smoothie, multivitamin. My mother brought home a very nice looking stationary bike that I'll try to use a few times a week, and that'll help too.

I'm not really looking to loose weight. Since I began working (which goes doubly when I hit the 9 hour+ mark), I eat what I want. For the most part. I don't (usually) inhale fast food, chips, soda and other fried foods, I do that once in a while. But if I want a cookie, a burger, a few chips or something, I eat it. I'm on my feet not eating for so many hours, I think it balances out.

I'm just looking to feel healthier. Not so tired. Not so cranky or short tempered. Not so easily susceptible to getting sick. Just a general feeling of betterness. So we'll see what happens.

PS- I'll be 23 in ten days. Just throwing it out there. =) I REALLY hope I'm not working the day after my birthday, but I'll just have to wait and see, and possibly negotiate something with a
co-worker.

[Update: I am going to end up working my birthday. We're probably going to be pureeing pumpkins two Mondays in a row- this coming Monday and the 13th. And I'm on for the 19th. There really is no point for the boyfriend to come allll the way down for that. So I plan on switching with someone, which means I'll be working the 12th, and the 13th, but not the weekend my boyfriend is coming, so I don't mind.]

Being Healthy Re-revisited

2008-09-30T16:08:00.004-04:00

I need to be eating better. I pretty much eat crappy most of the time. I know if I even hope to scrape by this holiday season, I'm going to need to build up my body now. I have to stop eating bad processed food and bad frozen food, and switch to better processed food.

I decided my main problem is breakfast, where I try to eat whatever the hell I can scrounge up to keep me somewhat fueled until I get the chance to eat again. Usually this entails leftovers, mac and cheese, burgers, pizza or some other fatty thing.

This is going to get me nowhere fast.

Usually I make something the night before (chicken cutlets, or something), but I always knew that I could make something healthier.

So today I did. I ended up making a smoothie. Tomorrow I'm gonna add some Instant Breakfast.

You need to pick your battles with most things in life. Checks and balances, maybe? It's like the environment. You probably can't wire solar panels on your roof, but can buy those reusable bags, recycle, and turn off lights.

I think being healthy is the same thing too. You can't get 5-8 servings of fruit, on top of whole grains, drinking water, getting calcium and vitamins and minerals and fiber, exercise, sleep. Low Cal, Low Fat, Low Carb, High Fiber, Vegatarian, Vegan. On top of eating organic sustainable AND LOCAL and....it's just too much!!!!!

But you can make a reasonable effort. Drink a smoothie, trade soda for water/milk, eat an apple instead of chips. Take a multi-vitamin. Fast food/fried food once in a long while. Go to a Farmer's Market. Walk around the block. I think it helps.

I can't always eat healthy. But I'm going to make a reasonable effort. Today I made a smoothie, but I also bought peanut butter crackers and cheese crackers in little packages for work for around the time at about 8 o'clock, when I'm famished and my only options are day old bread toast or a cookie. In that case, I think I'm better off with the packages of crackers. But I also bought "Whole Grain, High fiber" toaster pastries (I didn't even know they MADE those!). They're from that Fiber One brand, and I think that helps too. It makes me feel like I'm doing something halfway decent for myself.

I think getting three servings of fruit is better than no servings of fruit. And 20% of my daily need for fiber or calcium is better than none, too. I think doctors and nutritionists would agree with me, too.

It's impossible to get 100% of every SINGLE NEED in your dietary life. You'd be eating ALL DAY and that isn't healthy either.

Every time I think about what I need and how much of it I get and how much of it I don't, I tend to panic a little and feel overwhelmed, but to avoid ending this on a doom and gloom note, I offer you this: winning tiny battles in your war of good intentions is better than nothing. Buying reusable bags does help a little bit. Taking a multi-vitamin helps a little bit. Drinking water over soda helps a little bit.

So I guess I can't get so hard on myself. And you have my permission to not be so hard on yourself too.

Marshmallow Junkie

2008-09-29T11:59:00.006-04:00

For those who don't know me, and for perhaps some of you who do, I am a marshmallow junkie. Anything with marshmallows in it, from Mallowmars to Peeps to homemade to those tacky marshmallow filled cones, catches my eye. From the cheap bag of store brand marshmallows for the $5 for a package of 16 at Trader Joes, I'm thoroughly hooked on the spongey white stuff.

I don't think I'm a full flegded addict yet; I don't rush to buy peeps on holidays, or anything that I see with marshmallows. To tell you the truth, I think I've grown out of peeps (unless they are stale).

I went to Tj Maxx today, with the intention of buying a bag for work (one to accommodate a travel mug, lunch, snacks, a hat, my wallet, and a reliable place to put my work key), and ended up wandering there for almost an hour, debating bathrobes, fleeces and work pants.

It was the clearance table that caught my eye near the home goods section. A whole table of clearance food items. I browsed it with no intent to buy anytihng, when I saw a package of what I could identify as marshmallows.

They were novel and brightly colored. Shaped into squares and ropes. The tiny label said "The Marshmallow Castle" And upon further search, I saw another package of triangle marshmallows.

I snatched up the quirky package of marshmallows skewered on plastic kabobs immediately, after seeing the $1 price tag. The novelty of colored marshmallows on a skewer was well worth the price that I would usually pay for a bag of regular marshmallows.

No sooner had I stepped off the curb (with only a travel mug, said marshmallows and a purse) did I dig out the package and rip open the crinkly plastic with my teeth, tear off the white/pink/ and blue roped marshmallow off and pop it into my mouth. It's very chewy, like there's too much gelatin- which I suppose, if you're making a marshmallow castle, you'd need a strong, chewy foundation.

Before I even start my car I've eaten 4 of them. And decide to save the rest to display here. But even that didn't last long. I managed to eat about half the package before I arrived home.

The flavor of these marshmallows of pink, green and blue are the artificial 'vanilla' I've come to expect from marshmallows. But it was different than the conventional brands, it's deeper and more distinct. But it isn't vanilla. It's 'vanilla'. It's a bit like how when you eat fruit flavored candy, you can identify 'cherry', 'grape', 'strawberry' and 'watermelon', as such, but it really isn't like biting into the fresh fruit. Vanilla in every candy is no different. I know what real vanilla tastes like, as does probably most level-headed people do. But real vanilla and 'vanilla' cater to two totally different things.

I'm considering going back to Tj Maxx this week, to buy more of these marshmallows.

My Dirty Little Eating Secret

2008-09-25T16:26:00.007-04:00

You know how the food you eat as a child don't always taste as good when you get older? Some stuff is like that for me: Chicken Mcnuggets, Cadbury Creme eggs....other things I can't recall. I remind you of my shameful little secret here .

Yes. I did make my rice bowl. My mother had made Crispy chicken, my top ten in favorite foods, for dinner on Monday....But we were low on ketchup.

The chicken was great, and I was thinking about leftovers. Then it hit me. My dirty little secret eating habit: Rice, corn, chicken and ketchup. How would I hide this, you wonder?
I remembered how early I wake up for work, and it clicked. Who the hell would know what I ate that day? Duh! Eat it in the morning!

The next day, I went to work a few minutes early to allow time to quickly eat. I heated up the tubberwear, eagerly waiting,wondering if it would taste as good as it used to.

Let me tell you....it did. With that first mouthful, it was as good as I remember it. My palette was not above eating weird dishes of my childhood. I scarfed it down, torn between 'enjoying' and 'getting to work before too much time went by'

So my readers, some things really ARE as good as you remember. So I encourage you to eat that weird food combination so loved by yourself as a child that has been

Blog

2008-09-19T18:48:00.011-04:00

My blog is disorganized. I know. I'll work on it when I have the time. I'm back at work, and we've been BUSY! So I'm tired. I'll fix this soon for the 4 people who read this blog (which I deeply appreciate, even if it is only a few of you)

~~~~~~

Just wanted to say sorry if this blog doesn't meet your expectations (and that came out sounding rude, so I'm sorry again). I promise one day I will be much more precise and careful about how I type. If you'd like a list of REAL blogs (since mine is pathetically amateur), here they are. I read these daily and I find something of value in all of them, in their own special ways. =)

Skipping Over Long Recovery Post and Moving Onto.....

2008-09-09T14:44:00.006-04:00

My infection. Yes. I got an infection. A week or so after my appendix had been taken out. (I refer you to here to catch you up ) A particularly nasty one, actually. To me at least.

I was feeling pretty great Thursday. I was up and about and felt pretty fine. Friday I went to into town, just to get out of the house, but not too far away. I went home, I made lunch, I cleaned my room and even showered (if anyone has had their appendix out or a similar surgery, you know what a small victory this is- to get up, walk and stand long enough to shower). I felt like I could go out the next day and go to work for a few hours on Tuesday.

But my body had other plans. That Friday my side felt sore and tender, it was a bit pink. I didn't really think anything of it. Maybe I over did it the other day, maybe I slept it wrong by accident. I told my mother, who thought it looked pink and wanted to go to the ER. But since I felt fine and was just a bit tender, I didn't think there was much that can be done. I figured they'd look at it, tell me to take it easy, and send me home. And since my insurance would probably just slide under as it was, I didn't want to push it with another ER visit.. But I'd keep on eye on it.

So that night I didn't sleep great. When I woke up I felt stiff and sore. And awful. My mother wanted to go to the ER...I didn't (I'm so stupid!!!!!!!!! >.<) But we negotiated down to a Doctor's visit. The on-call doctor prescribed antibiotics on the phone, and I spent several hours watching a marathon of House in the dark of my room, trying to lay comfortably. The antibiotics either didn't do much, or made me feel worse. I just felt crappy. It hurt to walk, roll over or move too much. I didn't feel this lousy since the day I was out of surgery.

By dinner time I managed to crawl downstairs and eat a few bites of pasta, still laying down. I felt horrible, still in pain. I watched "Uptown Girls" feeling miserable, by 9, I crawled back up to my room and finished watching the movie, feeling wretched, and teary. I was still in pain: nausea, tenderness, soreness,elevated temperature, headache since before I took the antibiotics, I was tired. I just felt awful and I couldn't take it.

I figured these were all side effects from the pills (which were many), and I was just overtired and recovering. Along with the infection. So I really didn't think that it was too big a problem. I figured this was how it was supposed to go and I'd feel much better once I had 24 hours of pills in me. Somehow I managed to doze off. I woke up, feeling much, much worse. It took me forever to get the will to sloth myself out of bed and into the bathroom, where I felt disgustingly nauseous. I got back out of the bathroom, and my parents asked me if I was alright, which I wasn't. My mother took my temperature, brought up tea and toast, which I could scarcely nibble, and we waited. I had a fever- 101.7. Crap. And hour later, at about 3 am, my mother took me to the ER, we were admitted quickly and I found myself in an ER bed, getting three vials of blood drawn and on some pretty amazing heavy duty IV drip pain killers. Not Sit-com hospital stay heavy duty (You've seen it. The protagonist gets their tonsils or appendix taken out and they have this "hilarious" bit of song singing or love confessions) , but it made me feel pretty good. They sent me to to ultra sound, and back down to drink awful contrast, and up two hours later for a CAT scan, which confirmed an abscess. The ER doc explained it to me, and it made me feel better. Something like a surgery. I had the impression that I'd be put under again, put into ER for about a 30 minute procedure, and everything would be fine. I was admitted to the hospital. Again.

I was numb with misery. I managed to doze uncomfortably on and off, it took me half and hour to get the will to get up and use the bathroom. I felt like I did a day or two after my last surgery. The doctor who prescribed my antibiotics came in and spoke to me, about what was going to happen. He gave me the idea this was no big deal, I'd be heavily drugged and it wouldn't "hurt", as in, yes, it would hurt a bit, but it'd be okay( lying bastard). So, fine. I'd rather have been in the OR, under, and in no pain, but I guess this would do. But I've been wrong before. The Physician's assistants came in and also insured me it would be okay(because girls around my age have given me SO many reasons to trust them in the past). What ensued at about 12:30 that day was so disturbing, traumatic, excruciatingly painful, that excruciatingly painful, that I can't.....I can't type, let alone relive them in my mind ever again....I'm thoroughly traumatized, shell shocked and whatever textbook word you can come up with.

I screamed, I sobbed, nearly hyperventilated, begging them to stop, telling them I can't go on, that I was scared, hurting. I've NEVER in my entire life have had pain that has made me scream like that. Or sob like that.

I can't go over the details. I don't want to think about it. All I can tell you was my stitches were reopen, bedside and a scalpel was used to open me a bit more. My abscess was drained and gauze was out inside me. My wound remains open, but covered.

It was horrific. I wish they knocked me out. I wish I had surgery. I wish it had gone DIFFERENTLY. This is 2008, not the Civil War.

I'm not exaggerating. Exaggerating is cheap writing and speech. I never knew pain where I screamed before. Begged. I was under a double dose of my pain killer (given with a needle, and not an iv or pill) but it didn't do anything. They had to stop to give me a break halfway through so I could sob and calm down...

........Anyway............after that I slowly felt better. By mid-afternoon I was able to drink water, various stages of watered down apple juice and ate graham crackers.

By evening, my mother came back with my sister, who came with her laptop and a gigantic fruit smoothie. They went to grab some dinner at the cafeteria, and brought me back some soup.

The rest of my stay was uneventful. I watched too much TV, dozed, received heavy IV antibiotics and got shots of pain meds. I had wonderful nurses and my own room on a floor that made me think I was in Geratrics. I got better and better and now I'm home. I wish, wish, wish that I had gone the hour I felt a tiny bit worse, when my infection was low, manageable, non-painful. Not 3 am Sunday morning, with a 24,000 white blood cell count (higher than what it was when I had appendix problems) and feeling awful.

I Spent A Month There One Night, Part Two

2008-09-03T15:07:00.010-04:00

Warning! there's a picture of my scar at the end. It isn't graphic or disgusting,but if you don't want to see my stomach, then I'd be careful.

A transport came to wheel me up to surgery a bit after 9. I begged my nurse to let me go to the bathroom before that happened, and lucky for me, she seemed pleased that I even thought to think to use the bathroom...but how could I not? I was so pumped full of fluid I'd probably be going till the next morning....

Anyway, so after that was taken care of, I gingerly slid back onto the bed, and my parents, whom I must admit had been getting on my nerves slightly,( my mother had been fussy all night, and my dad was on my case about work medical insurance- which working at a small business, most normal people have the understanding and common sense it wont happen, but my dad seemed to be too...optimistic...or do I mean 'pushy'?) came with me. I had been hoping I'd take care of the rest of this myself.

I went slowly through hallways, and into an elevator, which a elderly man who looked like he worked there, asked me if I was nervous, which I gave him a friendly reply of "Nope, not really." my mother added I was more anxious "Yeah, about missing work." I thought.

They brought me into a new section, and I saw someone who looked familiar, who turned out to be my aunt's sister, who seemed very surprised to see me. And then I was into a room to speak to the anesthesiologist, an older guy who had a German accent. He briefed me, and left me with my parents till the surgeon came. A nurse came in, and helped me take off my earrings and get my stuff together. "Is your bra on?" She asked. I gave her a guilty look. "Yes." I said, and struggled to take it off, which I made into a much more difficult process than necessary. "Is your underwear off?" Another guilty look, and an indignant (and silly) exclamation of "My underwear too!?" So now I was pretty much nude in a hospital gown, waiting to be sliced open.

Finally, the surgeon came, and I was parted with my parents. I felt oddly calm as we went down the hall. She chatted me up about the bakery, and what I did there, and I felt I was being very well behaved and calm, like this was just another day at the hospital.
They put me into a bright white room and I looked around with curiosity. People were around, lights above me, a operating table, standard stuff.

They put me right up to the table and scooted me on, I tried to simultaneously move my IV'd arm onto something next to me, figure out what to do with my other arm, and keep whatever dignity I could muster in a thin gown intact.

They began to slide these cuffs on my legs and I was introduced to people who would be assisting my surgery..who's official terms I can't recall.

"Oh wow! You have Cafe au lait spots!" the girl exclaimed, fascinated (as if she'd never seen one before, which is true for most people, even in hospitals, probably) touching one on my calf. "It's a coffee color with softer skin!" I was taken by surprise, and had no other response but "Yeah, I do!" How socially awkward. But I was about to get surgery, so I think it's the best I could do.

That's the last thing I remember. That was slick and terrbily clever....distracting me with my spots while they drugged me up.

The next thing I know, I'm gasping, dry throated, with an oxygen mask half off my mouth, while many voices called "Jennifer! Jennifer!" Ugh. What? I'm in pain and trying to sleep! My eyes slid open with immense effort, and I'm in a yellow room, with monitors, and other people around me. I groan again, and my eyes heavily slid shut. "Jennifer!" They call again insistently. "What!?" I think.

I'm hurting, my throat is dry, and I'm tired. I struggle with my oxygen mask, pushing it off my face. I can breathe just fine. I don't need a mask. I don't remember if the nurse tries to put it back on, but I push it off again. Then a comment is made about putting in ones for my nose, which I guess I could settle with. I gasp, raspy and hurting. Surgery sucks. My only coherent thoughts were "What the hell is going on here? When can I get drugged and when can I sleep?"

I decide the nose plugs simply will not do, and push them off. The nurse, firmly, sternly, but kindly, tells me they need to stay in. I groan, feeling difficult. She asks what's wrong. I don't remember if I asked for water or pain killers first.

But I remember ice chips, and later, (what an embarrassing thing I'm about to admit) I get some kind of pain shot in a fleshy area. And I don't even care! Moon me to whoever the hell you want for all I care! But for the love of God, drug me up enough to make this pain go away! I feel difficult. I note the time, which is sometime after noon, and take note of people around me. Some kinda good looking guy in some kind of blue scrubs and a clip board-who I remember seeing being wheeled in before, an old person near by also in recovery, nurses in bright scrubs.

They wheel me out into the hallway, I think I saw my parents at some point, and they take me (I think) in an elevator going up, and wheel into what I thought read "Pediatrics"

"What?" I think to myself, "I'm 22-years old, do they know that?" But it sounded calm and quiet. I'm almost all the way down the hall and into a room with a bed, in which I have to get onto myself, they tell me.
"Nooo." I rasp and whine, feeling difficult again "I don't want to move." But they insisted. So slowly inching, I got onto a bed, and was able to not move. A nurse came in, Nurse Mellisa, who asked me a lot of standard questions, and told me if I needed anything to buzz, how often she'd be in to check vitals (which she did as she talked) and put on the pressure leg cuffs on me again. I again fought the oxygen plug, and Mellisa finally pulled it off of me. She left and I was alone with my mother. I don't really remember what was said other than how I felt. She also mentioned going home for a bit, which I insisted on. I just wanted to sleep anyway. Not even TV was luring enough.

I dozed on and off, and my mother left around three. I kept dozing, Dr. Phil or King of the Hill not even being enough to keep me awake, and I woke up again. "Crap" I thought, "I need to PEE." Crap. I considered my options (trying to get up on my own, buzz the nurse, or hold out till the nurse gets back), and finally buzzed the nurse. Who came on intercom and I asked her if I "Could please use the bathroom." She came in, and helped me out of bed and into the bathroom, and saintly gave me my privacy. I honestly can say that I don't remember needing to pee this much this often in my entire life as I did during my hospital stay.

When I finally got myself out, Mellisa was there to help me. I sheepishly asked her if I could please put on some underwear, which she let me, and helped me get back into bed. I dozed on and off for about 20 minute intervals for the next several hours, waking for vitals, water and lame attempts at tv.

When my mother came, she made me attempt to eat, which I really didn't want to, but tried Italian ice, saltines and graham crackers.

The rest of my night is more of the same:dozing, getting up to pee, nausea, pain, and attempts to eat and drink.

I felt lousy, even on medication. I was surprised I wasn't doped up and loopy (and why wasn't I? I hear that stuff is great). I texted and called my boyfriend now and then, to see what was up and when he'd be here, and was pleased to hear he managed to catch and early train. He'd be here by 8:00.

He came to visit, along with my brother and father, and stayed for a bit. It was nice to see him. He didn't say much, but it just felt nice to have him there. He didn't stay very long, which i wish he did, but about the time he left I needed to use the bathroom, again.

The night was the same cycle. I'd sleep for 90 minutes, wake up, use the bathroom, slide into bed, get pain pills and repeat. It was horribly inconvenient. I had to wake up my mother every time and needed her help unplugging the iv and bringing it in with me. I only threw up once or twice the entire night, and it was all water, luckily, so it wasn't too bad.

I finally woke up at about 5 or 6. And knew that I was done sleeping for the night. My mother was up too. I spent some time watching Family Matters before switching to my book on tape on my ipod. I managed to eat yogurt, cherry Italian ice, and apple juice. The new nurse who came in thought that was a very good sign.

Eventually, my iv was pulled out, and I put on real clothes and deodorant, and brush my hair. I felt "better" in the sense that I wasn't groggy or in intense pain. I would be discharged soon and home by noon.

While we waited, we watched "I love Lucy" and made a few attempts at walking up and down the hallway. Which made me exhausted.

When the surgeon came in, I was apprehensive, but ready to go home. She checked out my scar, and told me what I can and can't do, when to make an appointment for a check up and to keep watch on certain other things.

Then she had to take out my iv. Which meant she had to pull the loads of tape that had been on since 2 am the previous day. This is where I was most childish and difficult, shamefully. I wouldn't let her! It HURT! I insisted that I do it, but finally she took it over, leaving me to wince and wither in pain.

I finally got to sink into a wheel chair and start to go home. My mother ran me right into a door frame. x.x I tried to wheel myself around my room before we left, but that movement alone made me sick to my stomach, so I let my mother steer.

My brother and boyfriend eventually pulled up and I eased myself into the front seat and we were on the way home, I was ready to lay downstairs and simply not move for a very long time.

All in all I thought I was a very well behaved patient. I was calm and complacent. Told them everything they needed to know and did it without melting down or becoming too upset. I let them stick me with needles without flinching, crying or fighting. I was friendly, polite and chatty.

Don't get me wrong, the whole experience was bizarre, but not all together "terrible"....well, it was. The pain and nausea was unbearable at times, but I'm alive and healing, and there are worse reasons to be in the hospital.
Recovery time is coming up, sooner or later.

EDIT> I got an infection.

I Spent A Month There One Night, Part one.

2008-08-31T19:07:00.008-04:00

Got my appendix out. More later.
......

So it's "Later" Almost 5:30 on September first. It's been about four days and about 6 or 7 hours since surgery. I've graduated from whatever pain killer they prescribed, and am now on a few aspirin and the occasional pain killer, which is far superior than whatever I was on. The large amounts of Tylenol I'm on will probably make my mouth bleed, but at least I can eat and walk/sit upright.

So it all started about 7pm Thursday. It was very nearly dinner, and I had this very dull pain in my right side. I didn't think much of it; cramps, dehydration, pulled muscle from being off from work for so long (since I returned to work that day after being closed for vacati0n). I ignored it until I went to bed at about 9 that night, to get myself back into the work schedule. My right side was too tender to lay on. Again, I didn't think much of it, but was mildly concerned.

Sometime in the middle of the night, amidst dreams of outlet malls and the two main characters of "In Her Shoes" I felt this constant, nagging pain in my side. It woke me up. It's 11:30. Now I'm worried.

"Crap." I thought, and texted my boyfriend, telling him I felt weird. No response. Two gradually frantic messages later, and he called me, and asked me a lot of questions; what hurts, where, how much, how far from your bellybutton exactly is the pain, how long has it hurt. The answers sounded a lot like appendix problems, even I couldn't deny it. But I still did.

"It's Labor Day weekend!!! I don't have time for this!" I whined, wincing at the pain I felt when I prodded my side. He convinced me to take an aspirin and wait an hour (well, he let me wait, he wanted me to go right away). And to call him later.
I slowly got out of bed, wanting a second opinion, and WebMd'd "Appendicitis." I fit the description. "Crap!" I thought to myself.

Two short MSN message conversations and an hour later (I wanted second opinions, both people expressed concern and said stuff to the effect of "I'd be sad if you died!" , I knocked on my parents door and my mother and I were off to the ER.

The ER took a long time. About an hour wait. 1:3o, 2:30, every hour reaching closer to work.
"Crap." I thought. Wondering that if it were nothing, would I get to work on time? Make it through the day?

Finally, a doctor that looked a bit like Dr. Kovach and Sylvester Stallone called my name. I was given a gown, which I refused to take my pants and bra off for, and was incredibly relieved I had remembered to shave my legs that night (because every girl knows to even be seen in the ER, you must be properly shaved and have on non-holey underwear). He took vitals and inserted an IV (Oh. Dr. Stallone Kovach told me I had 'very nice veins' as he gave me the IV, which I don't think I've ever heard before in my life), chitchatting causally and comfortably while another young doctor poked and prodded my stomach, reaching a tender point.

"Well," he said "If I had 20 bucks, I'd say your appendix is going to come out this morning." I groaned. I did not have time for this. He told me they'd need to do a CAT scan two hours after drinking some contrast liquid; Dr. Stallone Kovach assured me that it wasn't too awful, now that it was made in lemon flavor.
The other doctor asked me a few other questions, which I'd been asked before by the ER main area, and jokingly said "So, you're pretty medically boring." (aside from the NF, which I still don't know if any of them know anything about, even if they had the good sense to pretend they did)
They left, leaving me to wonder if doctors took some sort of class that trained them to be causal, outgoing and talkative enough to make the patient feel comfortable enough to revel any information they were looking for. I'd have to ask one of my med student friends.

The contrast came, given to me by a petite, bubbly, blond, youngish looking nurse, who called me "Kiddo" which made me think if you were allowed to call someone that if they were less than seven years younger than you (I highly doubt she was under 27).

She also gave me morphine.

Which made me want to laugh. A lot. And made my head lull back heavily into my pillow. I tried to keep it under control, lest I accidentally let slip secrets of my life to my mother, which is pretty low key, anyway.

The contrast wasn't bad. It tasted like watered down lemon crystal light. But there was a lot of it. About a quart. It made me have to pee a lot, too.It felt like two bladders full. Orange you glad I shared? Which was a pain, because I had to wait for bubbly blond nurse to come check on me to unhook me so I can go wobble out, iv needles in arm, nearly naked under an ill-tying sheet, in hospital footies no less, to the bathroom.

The pain wasn't too bad, to tell you the truth. The waiting and peeing part was annoying. I had to wait two hours for the CAT Scan. I read my book (Joy Luck Club), trying to make it last, and finally, after 5:15, after being in the room for a few hours, I was wheeled up to CAT Scan, where I was given this weird injection that the tech told me "You'll feel warm from your throat down all the way to your groin, and you'll feel like you're going to the bathroom, but you aren't."

The sensation was in fact, warm. And very pleasant. It made me giggle and stupidly exclaim "It's really warm!!" When that was finally done, I was sent back, and 20 minutes later the same ER doc walked in (Not Dr. Kovach's American twin): "So, you got that $20?" Did he look smug?

Great. Oh, did I mention he came in somewhere in the middle of the 2 hour wait to inform me my white blood cell count was over 15,000? Well he did. Another great sign.
So I thoroughly had appendicitis. With mounting pain. He sat down next to me, and got on the phone with the surgeon on call, apparently someone my mother knew, and explain to me what was going on in the simplest ways possible.

To be honest, I was more concerned with how long I'd be out of work than anything else. We'd called my boss at 5 that morning, and she was more concerned about me being okay than anything else, but I was still worried. We had just been written up in the NY times the weekend we closed, and had been recently got an article about us in a local magazine. We'd also been closed for over a week and it was labor day weekend. Did I mention that? I don't think I did.

At this point it was nearly 6:45 and the surgeon, an older woman, came in and explained what would happen. It would happen a bit after 9, and would take less than an hour. I'd be off from work for at least a week, and we'd have to see how I felt after that before I would go back.

So, two hours before surgery, it really occurred to me how surreal this was. How bizarre this felt. My sister came and left, my dad came, with my ipod, so I got to listen to one of my books on tape. And passed the time before I was to be sent up to surgery. I was staring at the iv in my arm, baffled, that the night before I had went grocery shopping, made a peanut butter sandwich, put my clothes out. All ready to go to work. Now I was sitting half naked in a gown, with an iv, in an ER, waiting for surgery.

PS- If I didn't say so, fifty points to the person who can identify the line from the movie where I got the title from.

Halloween Candy

2008-08-28T18:04:00.003-04:00

So, I had this epiphany driving through Darien today.

I had just been to Shaws, and I had passed by the Halloween Candy display with an interested glance, but decided to wait till the common and predicable dip in prices sometime in Mid-October. After leaving, my mind still dwelled on the Mellow creme pumpkins, by far my absolute hands down favorite Halloween Candy, quite possibly my favorite holiday candy of all the holiday candies.
It then hit me: I had finally reached one of my long time fantasy goals in life: buying enough of my favorite holiday candy to last me nearly the whole year till it comes back again. I'll buy a bag here, a bag there, accumulating roughly twelve bags of candy (or twelve each, depending on what I'm after), which hopefully would last me until next Halloween (or holiday), when the process would start again. This fantasy brought to me by a job and a consistent cash income.

I remember doing this once in high school. I had just gotten my license, this brought about the realization of being able to go out and buy holiday candy at will. It was Spring, and Easter candy was everywhere. I bought Cadbury creme eggs (which tasted a lot better when I was a child) by the threes, until I had about 15. I ate one, sometimes two a month, and it did, in fact, last me until the following March.

I love Mellowcreme pumpkins. The melt in your mouth, grainy sugary texture, plump pumpkins are addictive. I eat them till my teeth burn. They have no distinct flavor, they don't taste quite like candy corn, more like its cousin, which I suppose they are already. Candy corn I like, but if I can't get my eager hands on the mellowcremes, Indian corn would do. Eaten by the threes or fours or biting off one section at a time (or eating sections off three or four at a time, leaving the chocolate behind to be consumed all at once), Indian corn offers a better version of Candy corn, it's the chocolate that sells me on it.

As much as I love the shrunken version of my favorite candy bars, I prefer the season specific Halloween candy: chocolate covered marshmallows in shapes of cats, ghosts and pumpkin, said various candy corns, bat pops that turn your tongue(?) black......that's all I can think of right now, but I'll add more if I think of them.

And now it is the end of August, meaning all things Halloween went out sometime in Mid-August. Come mid September, it will all be on ALL be on sale, come the end of October and it will be on CLEARANCE. (Candy on clearance is better than finding shoes or clothes on clearance...well, maybe not) I can't wait.

Third Attempt at "What I Ate on My Summer Vacation."

2008-08-27T17:32:00.006-04:00

I've been trying to write this post for about an hour, and this is my third attempt.

I think I've lost the knack for describing perfectly cooked meals. I feel like a small child describing what she did on her summer vacation: "And then we went to the beach and it was good. The weather was good, I got knocked down by a wave. My mom lost her glasses. The food was good. Annnnnd, ummmmmmmm, I likeded the part where I got to stay up late."

Insufferable.

But the thing is, I really did have a fantastic time. The weather was better than I could have asked for: sunshine, warmth, a breeze here and there, big waves. It was nice to sit in a beach chair all day and read while the waves and breeze carried a mist to us. I have at least five different shades of skin tone in varied stages of "tan" and "white computer nerd". Sexy.

I guess this is the time where I should mention that we went to my uncle's beach house, which is the only way we could even get to Rehoboth, or even get the idea of going there.

The touristy strip boasts eateries ranging from "Crappy Family Food", "REALLY Crappy Family Food (I'm looking at you, Grotto's), "Decent Quick lunches" "Greasy, 50+ years old, delicious burger shacks" and of course, your seafood/breweries and your high class restaurants where not a child is to be found. There are places to eat EVERYWHERE and anyone can find something they like.

Our first night out, we went to this Cafe on a sidestreet, where the drinks menu is longer than the food menu. I didn't know what to eat, but I knew I wanted something good to drink. My mother told me a beer would not do, because I had brought a dress I insisted on wearing and (to be perfectly honest and not the least bit modest) looked fabulous on me, and a beer simply would not match. So I got a Bellini. And the penne with a tomato coulis and pesto with some kinda parm like cheese. It was huge and delicious. The tomato coulis and pesto tasted fresh and the cheese was strong and made everything taste better.
My uncle's partner let me try a but of his Yellowfin tuna, which was perfectly cooked; meaning it was barely cooked along the black and white sesame seeded edges and the middle was only just warm. Just thinking about it makes my mouth water. The seeds rounded off the soy-ginger with its nuttiness and the fish tasted clean and fresh, nothing like the canned stuff (which I eat shamelessly with mayo and crushed potato chips).

I didn't try the other meals: pork tenderloin, crab cakes and various apps, so unfortunately I have nothing to report other than it all smelled and looked wonderful.

The next night we cooked dinner at home. I had planned to make strawberry shortcakes for dessert, but by the end of the day I was so tired from the sun and mildly cranky and agitated from all the confusion of lost glasses, and things being made more difficult and confusing than it had to be. My mother and I had done some outlet shopping, so by the time we hit the grocery store, we were so tired and hungry from the days events, I decided to nix the shortcakes and cop-out with home made chocolate sauce with premium ice cream. And store bought bakery cookies.
We decided to just buy some premade stuffed burgers at the store, and eat it with fresh local corn and potatoes. Dinner was delicious, my burger was nice and pink like a burger ought to be and moist with bacon and cheddar chopped and mixed inside the burger, the corn was tender and sweet, and the potatoes properly crisped. Which is the most I can really do in describing a dinner of burgers.

The chocolate sauce could have done with better chocolate, but like I said, I was tired and in no mood to find the candy isle to grab the good stuff, and it was just the four of us, so Hershey's chocolate chips would have to do. If you'd like the ratio, I did about 1 and a half cups chocolate chips to a half cup half and half. After heating the half and half to a steam, a poured it over the chips and let it sit to melt for about a minute, before carefully stirring it together. A pinch of salt and a teaspoon of vanilla (or liquor, if you'd prefer) is stirred in, along with a tablespoon of butter, and you have chocolate sauce. It's runny at first, but once it cools a bit, it'll thicken.

Anyway, our last night there we went to Dogfish Head, one of my most favorite restaurants, namely because they brew their own beer, whiskey and vodka. Oh, and the food is pretty great, too. I had a marinated Ahi tuna on black bread with some sort of aoli. I would have liked it cooked a bit less (because I love tuna as undercooked as allowed by food laws), but it was moist and flavorful. And I had five beers!! In a beer flight, of course. Which included a Lawnmower light, India Brown Ale, 60 Minute IPA, Raison D'Etre and Chicory stout. I preferred the darker ones to the light, but my hands down favorite I think was the Raison.....It was dark and unique tasting. We bought some beer to bring home to my brother and sister (Raison, Mida's touch and Festina) But I worry that it isn't unique enough for them, because they wanted something they wouldn't find easily....but outside of DE and DC that's pretty much everything minus the IPAs and seasonal beer. But some is findable, but difficult. I just hope they like it. If they don't, more for me and my father.

For my boyfriend, who is picky about his beer and other tasty drinks, I got the Blue Hen Vodka, which is, as far as I know, distilled right in their building. Which, if anything else, my boyfriend will appreciate. He's into that local, small batch stuff. I haven't tried their vodka, but it is supposed to be very tasty, especially the infused ones, which I bought him in Blood Orange and Pomegranate.

Anyway, I'll probably look at this tomorrow and tweak and make better, so please don't judge this yet! I'm tired from a long car trip and a good vacation so I'm currently lacking proper verbal skills.

Rehoboth

2008-08-27T17:11:00.002-04:00

Just got back from my uncle's beach house in Rehoboth Beach. I have much to say, but no interesting way to present it. Post pending.

I can't seem to stop eating. (Edited and added to)

2008-08-20T12:42:00.009-04:00

... I really can't. When I'm off from work, I can't seem to stop myself. I see something tasty, or something that can be cooked that is tasty (preferably, and shamefully chicken patties) and covered in ketchup.

For lunch, I had a "salad"; romaine with sliced red onions, a sprinkle of some kinda green small beans (possibly edamame or lima) with stovetop cooked frozen chicken patties, dipped in a honey mustard/bbq dressing.

And after that I inhaled a 7-layer bar. Oh yeah, and three iced sugar cookies. And probably stuff I can't remember

It doesn't sound like very much, but I'm about ready to go down to eat more.

At work, our choices for food is limited and unhealthy at best: frozen waffles, toast slathered in salted butter, breakfast sandwiches, turnovers. Sometimes I'll devour the broken cookies from the trays.
My breakfast choices are vastly limited. I aim for a bare minimum of 15 grams of protein, not taking much regard to fat, calorie or nutrient content.

I care about my weight, and I'm trying desperately hard to stay healthy, but it's pretty damn hard. Too hungry for a salad, not enough protein in half the crap workout magazines tell you to eat, too early in the morning to make a smoothie. What's a girl to do?

I'm trying to take these multi-vitamins, the size of horse pills, that I cut up into uneven fourths, and taking them isn't a pleasant thing. At least one piece gets stuck in your throat, or doesn't go down the first try, and it's incredibly disgusting.

I may have to start drinking canned protein shakes, or some kind of instant breakfast, along with forced vitamins. It's something. I'd rather eat the fruits and veggies, but at 4 am, who wants to take the trouble? I know it's something I must do, but it's nearly impossible. I'd love to make a pure fruit smoothie for breakfast, I wonder if making them the night before, right before bed, would be okay?

I think if I could (meaning, I had the money, time, and I wouldn't gain a pound or suffer health consequences) , I'd be one of those people we see on Dr. Phil (not to make light of their situation), who we see video taped going from fast food drive through to another, ordering enough food for a family with extra extra mayo in some cases and eating in large bites, for all of us gaping Americans to see, before going to their next food destination. Wouldn't we all want that? I'd love to sit here and eat burgers, fries, chicken tenders and onion rings from various chains. All day. Every day...I don't think I'd get really sick of it.

There are just days when I want to eat all the time. Always bad food, junky food, fried food, anything crispy and delectable. No salads, no fresh fruit, not even my favorite steamed broccoli with a spicy brown sauce. Just the worst kind of food, in large amounts, as much as I can.

But I think I have some self-control. I don't want to spend a lot of money on junk food, so I choose my splurges wisely. I'm not one to go to town buying packages of cookies, chips, dips, candy or delicious convince foods. So I suppose I'm not lost yet.

I just want to eat!! I think if I just had one day of non-stop junk food, fried food, stuff your face junk fest, it'll hold me over and I'll be so sick of bad food I wont touch it for months. Keep on holding on to that dream. Because it'll never happen.

All I can do is find that balance. A day of junk food here or there along with that healthy stuff. I'll figure it out. I need to figure it out quick though, or I'll be soon faced with a cold winter of constant sickness and awful sluggishness.

It just makes me feel bad. I do enjoy well prepared food. School has spoiled me with the good stuff. I enjoy a nice meal of braised veal cheeks, or barely cooked Yellowfin Tuna, or some homemade tomato soup with a BLT on a cold night. I appreciate the good stuff. I adore the good stuff. But I, like many Americans, just can't stop eating processed cheap crappy food. At school I was hardly ever like this. I craved the bad food, but would prefer the beef stews, the stir fries, the chicken from France day in Meds, trout Almondine from Skills. I never went to junk food because I had limited acess to it. But now I'm home, graduated with a job and some form of a car; with indepenance to cook and eat what I want, I'm going a little overboard with this newfound freedom.

Better going overboard on junk food with my freedom than more reckless things, I suppose.

2008-08-12T17:40:00.002-04:00

I need to start eating better.

Weird fatty breakfasts of mac and cheese, hot dogs, and other various sources of protein, paired with coffee, bagels and other refined carbs just aren't cutting it.

Guess it's time to bring on the salads.

Macaroni and cheese

2008-08-06T15:43:00.003-04:00

Sorry for not posting...whoever you are. Guess I'm a little tired after work.

No one is really around at dinner anymore. My sister is in Japan, my brother is house sitting and my mother spends every minute of daylight and some of what comes afterward outside planting and gardening, my dad is around, somewhere, but it usually just ends up being three of us or less, so I've done what I liked for dinner.

I wasn't exactly hungry, nor did I feel like copping out with a sandwich or pigs in a blanket. I wanted something with just enough effort to make me feel like I had cooked. So I settled on scratch mac and cheese. I used Trader Joe's multi grain pasta, so I'd feel healthy.

It turned out to be easier than the boxed stuff, actually. And much tastier. I used a sprinkle of cheddar, a slice of American, and a tablespoon each half/half and butter- added in reverse order until melted into a cheesy sauce. The cheese sauce was smooth and creamy, and turned out to be just enough to coat the pasta well without having scarce bits clinging to pasta, or to have it drowning in sauce.

To make me feel less guilty and to utilize leftovers, I cut some corn off the cob and threw it in to add a sweet texture and flavor contrast.

Turns out kid meals aren't too bad. I cooked Trader Joe's chicken nuggets to add a touch more protein.

I ate my meal a little guiltily, feeling like a child eating something a babysitter might make, sans scratch mac and cheese. But it was genuinely a decent meal; well rounded and good. Best you can hope for when you cook for yourself.

I feel badly that my boyfriend is on his own for meals, cooking for one can be un-motivating. When we were together at school we'd cook every weekend, all kinds of meals. Burgers, steak, pork, all kinds of chicken, braised, fried, baked, roasted and stir-fried. It was nice to have someone to cook with and for. Cooking for two is more friendly than mac and cheese for one.

I worried about what he might eat on the weekends; rec center food? Take out? THE VENDING MACHINE!!? I would have none of that. I sent him back to school with frozen pigs in a blanket, hot dogs and Annie's Mac and Cheese (more wholesome than Kraft by far) . This also includes all the stuff I left behind back at school: grainy pasta, brown rice, an assortment of spices and dry ingredients and snacks. It makes me worry less, and I know he can get hot dogs at the rec center, but I feel better knowing he's preparing them himself.

Eating and cooking alone can feel both lonely, but a chance to let you indulge in bizarre eating habits. I don't usually eat chicken nuggets in mixed company. Too many questions, justifying, and weird looks. Same with tuna. I only eat tuna when I'm home alone- that goes double for when I crumble chips directly into the tuna itself.
You can let yourself eat peanut butter out of the jar or put ketchup on rice. But then again, you won't be as motivated to slow roast beef or prepare a chicken stir-fry when eating for one.

I see these diets and ''lifestyle changes'' on tv and it makes me wonder how long they last. How lonely must it feel eating a vacuum sealed meal alone in the kitchen while everyone else you know is eating something they like with people they like? Eating can be largely a social experience and if you take that away, you're just eating to fuel your body- something nutritionists and ''trainers'' are telling people with weight problems to do. It just seems weird to me.

When I think of enjoying a good meal I don't just think of my favorite foods or indulging in guilty eating habits, but who I'm with and my surroundings. You can do that when you eat alone, you can enjoy your time and surroundings, but.....I'm talking in circles. I don't mind eating alone and sometimes I prefer it, but I just remember eating alone for months on extern, and when you're forced to do it, every day for months in a miserable situation, it can make you sour on the experience.

I guess the point I'mtrying to come to is if you cook alone, don't be unmotivated and cop out with easy frozen food. Stir-frys, pastas and pizzas are cheap and easy to cook from scratch and make you feel like you did something productive. Trust me, I work a lot of hours too and I understand how some days you'd sooner microwave soup than THINK about boiling pasta, but sometimes it feels good to go outside a routine and do something nice for yourself, like cook a good meal.

Crispy Chicken

2008-05-12T19:21:00.004-04:00

Like any fried and crunchy food loving person, one of my favorite things to eat is Crispy chicken. My mom's crispy chicken has such an addictive crunch and crispiness to it, I could eat plates and plates of it until I am unable to move. The part in my brain that tells me to stop eating seems to irk to a halt with crispy chicken, as if it is drunk with happiness of crispy pan fried food, and as long as there is some freshly made I'll be tempted to devour it all.

Growing up, this was one of my favorite things to eat (but every good kid loves a version of this, from fried chicken to chicken nuggets, it's truly a staple in the kid diet). The smell of breadcrumb coated chicken cutlets cooking in the pan, bubbling on top of a thin layer of oil to a perfect dark brown made my mouth water and me impatient.

When I was quite young I remember evenings spent on my favorite Winnie-the-Pooh bear blanket with a pilfered piece of freshly cooked crispy chicken, dribbled in ketchup, nibbling on the moist chicken with the light crunch coating while watching shows like "Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers" or "Saved by the Bell" right before dinner.

As I grew older and my awareness for cooking developed, my love for crispy chicken didn't wane, but "expanded". I had an aversion of leftovers, because they never tasted as good as they did the day before. But as I got older, I discovered tasty (and incredibly strange) ways of eating the left over chicken.
My first favorite thing to make was quesadillas, but in a bastardized American way: tortillas filled with corn, cold quivering slabs of velveeta cheese and cubed cold crispy chicken, cooked to a tasty golden brown. Yum. I can still remember the orange "cheese" melting over the other ingredients and volcano-ing lusciously over the edges. I didn't use salsa, or sour cream, or anything remotely related to the culture of quesadilla's origin. But to me, this was the best utilization of such leftovers.

The second dish is just a bit unorthodox, but back then was another way to use leftovers in a deliciously new way.
I hate to admit that this particular dish still appeals to me a little still, as well as the "quesadilla", but it's just another one of my many embarrassing eating habits from my youth I try desperately to shake but its appeal is just far too tempting, but indulging in it is just too humiliating (I swear when I move out, these two dishes will be first on my list).
My rice bowl consisted of leftover white rice, corn off the cob and cubed chicken.

After it's heated well, I added my favorite "Sauce"....ketchup, and mixed well. (I refer you to my New Year's post to revisit my love for ketchup). Honestly, almost anything that was once crispy and pan fried is delicious covered in ketchup. Truly, this meal was delicous. The crisp of the corn, the bland of the rice coated in ketchup, coated chicken with clumps of everything stuck to it. My mouth waters at the very thought.

But being older, and a little less picky, my tastes have changed. Or maybe I've just learned to be a little more embarrassed of my eating habits.

I still love fresh crispy chicken with ketchup (but with less, as my love for ketchup as been toned down considerably over the years). But now I like it with honey mustard dressing, cubed and tossed in a salad as well. Or just with spicy honey mustard on good bread. But I think given the chance and the privacy to do so, I would make a rice bowl again, or at least indulge in my velveeta quesadilla.

Bee Keeping

2008-05-10T12:08:00.008-04:00

The bees are here!

My dad is taking up bee keeping, and the bees, about 3 pounds of them, has arrived today. I was reading the "Bee Keeping for Dummies" book, and came across interesting bee keeping facts:

Drone bees eat a lot, are lazy and are there to mate, 200-300 feet in the air, and then die. At the end of the season, they are literally kicked out of the hive
If a good water source is not kept, bees will raid the neighbor's birdfeeders, hose faucets and pools
Bees can produce about 100 pounds of honey a season
Honeybees are usually "sweet and gentle" away from their hive
Making mead takes about 32 pounds of honey

More as this story develops.

Updates.

So the Bees are here....unfathomable amounts of bees.

I am officially terrified and paranoid.

The crates above house about 12,000 bees. Twelve thousand. Which means, minus bee deaths, we have about 24,000 of them.

The idea of that many bees, along with the idea of more over the summer makes me panicked and paranoid at the very thought.

I watched my dad shake out one of these crates into the built hives and it was, as my brother put it "like shaking out a box of cereal." Thousands of bees poured into the hives in enormous clumps.
It was enough to make a person run in the other direction. As a person who's been terrified of things that sting her entire life, I'm surprised I got close enough to take these pictures. Dozens of bees buzzed around the area as they acclimated to their new homes. All around. Everywhere. Terrifying.

"Bees can smell fear." I pointed out, when I was told I needed to get closer to get a better picture. I would have none of this. (A random Simpson's quote came to mind, which roughly goes: Oh, yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?")

The loud hum of buzzing was enough to make me run away, and as a bee flew by close enough to buzz in my ear, I jumped back, declared I had enough of this, and went inside, twitching and slapping my arms and neck at the phantom bees.

On the plus side, my brother said we should be getting about a cup and a half of honey a day when things really get going, so, I guess, all things considered, that isn't too bad.

So now I'm inside, obviously, after a second journey out, when I watched my dad pour in the bees into their hives. He dropped the crate! A big no-no. So I'm here, writing about my paranoid experience waiting for them to calm down, because I'd be pretty miffed too if someone dropped my temporary home, when I was hot, tired, and hungry after a long journey in a crate.

Fruit Snacks

2008-05-07T22:02:00.005-04:00

Fruit by the foot, Gushers, fruit roll ups. The most fruit an average kid saw in my day was usually limited to fruit snacks (and probably still today). Addictive, sweet, fun to play with, these snacks had it all. They were the "it" snack, trumped only by the elusive snack cake.

Who among us didn't roll the fruit by the foot out, and put the rolled half into your mouth, making it look like you had a long tongue? Who didn't press gushers together to ooze the syrupy filling out? I loved to carefully peel away the designs in fruit roll ups and arrange them on the filmy plastic before eating each one by one before pressing the remaining peels into a ball and eating it all at once.

I loved the strawberry flavor, tropical (I remember a bright yellow of "tropical" flavors"), and the most popular of them all- tye dyed, with indistinguishable flavors and usually passed off as "berry" with a marbled tone of red and blues. Fruit-Roll Ups stuck to your teeth at times like taffy, but something as silly as dental issues can't deter a child from such delicious lunch box treats.

Gushers could do no wrong. They could feature colors non-existent in conventional fruits of bright greens, neon yellows and turquoise. They could, like most fruit snacks, have fruit combinations and names that only live in a child's world of bright colors and weird names (ie- "G Force Tropical Rage, and "Rockin' Blue Raspberry to name two of the strangest. But I can't be too picky....Blue Raspberry as far as I know, doesn't exist in the produce world, and is a standard in every candy and fruit snack. ) Gushers are an original fruit snack, and have that amazing kid pleasing contrast of opposites and novelty. Squeezing them brought out a kind of joy, watching them slowly break and the inner juice dribble out over your fingers, or if done too hard, over your cartoon themed lunch box.

Fruit by the foot has all the elements the fruit snacks above has and all fruit snacks should have: a gimmick, weird colors, real and make-believe flavors (ie- Razzle Blue Blitz, Color by the Foot and Tropical Tango), wrapped up into three feet of fun. Little bits of trivia and jokes graced the waxy thin paper strips. You could measure with it, trade lengths of foot with it for other treats, you could swing it around. It was multi-functional. It was soft and chewy and didn't stick to your teeth as frequently as Fruit roll ups. It wasn't as sticky and you got more fruit for your inches. This was probably the best of them all. Clearly, you get more snack for your fruit with this snack. It wasn't as flashy as Fruit Roll Ups, not as big a novelty as Gushers. It wasn't fussy. Fruit by the foot was zen in the sence that it just was.

I miss fruit snacks. I recently bought some for my boyfriend as a surprise since we'd talked about them the week before, and felt a little sheepish looking at all the choices, and putting them in my basket. But sharing a pouch of Gushers with him, smelling the familiar artificial scents, tasting the "flavors" brought me back to Formica cafeteria tables of a vague time when being friends with someone meant sharing lunches and a swing set, where .50 cents bought you an ice cream sandwich from the lunch line, and school lunches packed by a parent meant the mystery and surprise of what might be.

Ice Cream

2008-05-06T20:13:00.005-04:00

I don't think I'm that big an ice cream fan. I know. Blasphemy. I like ice cream, sundaes, ice cream sandwiches, but I don't like it too often, or in too high quantities.

Sometimes I like ice cream, but it has to be the right moment. I can't just eat a bowl of ice cream, covered in Hershey syrup on a whim (like I used to as a child, but maybe my palette has become more particular) . I have to really want it. My favorite ice cream dish is at the Eveready Diner, in Hyde Park. It's this enormous sundae- three scoops of vanilla ice cream and Reese's pieces, Heath bar and M&ms. Topped of course, with whipped cream, draped with hot fudge and a cherry. My favorite spoonful is one with a bit of each candy, a dollop of shiny hot fudge, ice cream that has melted slightly and whipped cream. The contrast of creamy, quiet vanilla, showy chocolate, warm, cold, melted and shelled candy is mouthwatering. I love M&ms with soupy ice cream that has been marbled with hot fudge.

It's a mammoth dish of ice cream. Enough for two determined people and possibly one picker. I love letting it melt a little before it's finished, allowing me to fish out the candy I want from the bottom of the glass. Candy fragmented ice cream soup is even more delicious than the sundae itself after the tongue thaws out.

I'm thinking about ice cream tonight because the co-founder of Baskin-Robbins has died. There isn't anything on the site, but the dark side of me is wondering how the corporation is going to exploit this. 90 cent scoop night anyone?

Baking Cookies

2008-05-03T13:43:00.002-04:00

I just finished making an enormous batch of cookies. I like to bake chocolate chip cookies, but at the same time, I find them finicky. It seems like when I make them, too much depends on exact cirumstances: the exact amount of flour and leaveners, butter temp going into the bowl, how much of what kind of sugar, mixing time for each step, baking time, how many times you turn the pan, how many pans are in the oven. It all determines how the cookie will turn out. Too much white sugar and the cookie will be crunchy, too little baking soda and they wont spread very well.

I find that I like my cookies soft and chewy, so I add more brown sugar than I do white sugar, as well as add a bit more flour to prevent excessive spreading. Sometimes I add too much flour, so they barely spread at all. It's a little frustrating. I've been assisting with and baking cookies since I've been old enough to stand on a chair. I haven't perfected this yet?

I'm trying to see what works. So far, I've found that pre rolling the dough into balls and chilling between each baking batch slows the spread, but lengthens the cooking time, but you end up with a nicely baked cookie, that's usually a bit softer than crunchy. More brown sugar than white also helps, but the ratio is delicate.

Now the best part, the chocolate chips, is a delicate balance too. You want to have a nice ratio of cookie to chocolate, without going overboard or looking too skimpy. This may or may not take a while to perfect. I've been baking these so long it lacks needing measuring (the idea that baking is so exact makes me wonder about the things I've been baking my whole life, and all the mothers and grandmothers out there who scoff at measuring and turn out the best food imaginable) I don't know the exact amount of chips I use, I add and add until it looks right to me,but I like to think anyone with any eating sense would do the same, and the probably do.

This batch made a ton of cookies, over sixty. I made a batch and a half so my boyfriend could take some back to school with him, but I just hope they'll remain fresh until then.

I had one or two, and they are a little inconsistent in coloring, but overall good. They have a brown sugary crisp on the outside with this tiny hint of sea-salt in the background, and chewy on the inside. The bottom bake is nearly perfection of the color of darkly toasted coconut. Many of them are thick and puffed, while some deflated and are a little more crunchy than I might like. The chocolate chips are still melted and are scattered throughout each cookie, lending a perfection of chocolate and dough with each bite.

Chocolate chip cookies really are simple to make, but getting them just the way you like takes time, practice and patience. There are so many different ways to make it, so many different fillings to add in, but whatever your version may be, the chocolate chip cookie is the closest thing I've found to the perfect cookie.

Store bought cake

2008-05-01T14:42:00.005-04:00

There is about a quarter of a small store bought cake left in the kitchen. My sister had her last day at a school for her internship (I believe) and she came home with this cake. Now the dilemma...I have a weakness for really bad for you icing...or any kind of icing. The way it doesn't melt in 90 degree heat, how it coats the tongue, how it pipes and spreads. We all know it's shortening, cheap sugar and flavoring, but is that really such a bad thing if you only eat it once in a while? It's so addictive. This particular icing is especially good. It's so airy. The flavor can only be described as "white icing- light vanillian flavor. It is good in the most evil way- the kind of good you only find in food you know is terrible for you; fast food, canned icing, deep fried delights at state fairs. The kind of "crap food" you hate to admit you think tastes good.
I'm really not supposed to like this stuff. I was raised in a house that only saw boxed cake mixes for Church coffee hours. The extent of store bought cake was from an Italian bakery (a chocolate mousse cake), but once or twice I recall getting an ice cream cake from Carvel, and my sister's watermelon roll cake from Friendly's.
The only time I had cakes like this was when mother's brought cupcakes in for birthdays, or at a birthday party at someone else's house. So for me, it was a rare treat of inches of icing mounded on moist cake. To a kid, that is possibly the ultimate indulgence of pure sugar you can get, especially if you get a rose. To an adult, this is such a guilty pleasure you have to try to open the container as quietly as possible so it doesn't rustle and sound the alarm that you are actually thinking about eating something like that.

For a store bought cake, this particular one is good. The cake itself is moist and falls apart in your mouth, the ratio of cake to icing must have come from the expertise of someone who does these cakes hours a day continuously. It was neither too much or too little, smooth tops and bottoms.

I could never do that. Not without a lot more practice. The first cake I've iced decently was my boyfriend's birthday cake. It was perfect, if I do say so myself...well..almost. The sides were straight, the top was flat. No crumbs. The icing was pure white, fluffy and airy...which makes for a great icing, but not so much for decorating. It was near perfection and possibly one of the best icing jobs I've ever done.

I'm a little envious of these cake decorators. I lack the hands but not the skill or know-how, so my effort ends up sort of in the middle..so cakes look like that of an under skilled home-cook. Which isn't a bad thing for family, but if you want a job, it makes things a little more difficult. But honestly, I don't think cake decorating is for me.

Hopefully things will turn around with practice and patience. Until then I'm happy to try my hand at cakes for my family, and secretly indulge in the occasional store bought cake the rare times they come around.

Hot Dog Dinner

2008-05-01T10:32:00.003-04:00

We, meaning my siblings, we on our own for dinner last night. I had no idea what to have. I had homemade tomato soup and a turkey sandwich for lunch, so I wasn't really in the mood for that again.
I had no idea what to have. I've had this compulsive need to eat healthy, since most of my family is on a healthy eating thing (to the point where my sister will exclaim "Why are there cookies in the house!!?"), so I feel obligated to eat healthy or justify an unhealthy thing. How neurotic.
I finally settled on a hotdog and cheddar sunchips. After chipping off a frozen hot dog bun and hot dog from their frozen packages and thawing them slightly, I threw the bun under the broiler and a hot dog in a hot pan with melted butter, and let it turn around and sizzle.

The smell of pan cooked hot dogs was familiar,and made me think of chili, diced red onions and cheddar spilling over an overstuffed hot dog. It reminds me of hot summer days when my mom would come home from work with a large vat of freshly cooked chili after deeming it too hot to cook. Now I was craving red onions with chili.

The hot dog's skin cooked and blistered slowly, turning alone by the heat and popping of the skin. The scent of savory cured beef with melted butter wafted up into the kitchen. The hot dog bun was toasting too slowly for me, and I worried if I let it go unchecked I would forget about it and end up with a charred bun, so I removed it before that could happen, and filled the bun with diced red onion, relish and mustard.

As I sat down with my finished dog, I popped a cheddar sunchip in my mouth, enjoying the cheesy flavor and grainy crunch of the chip. I was tempted to crumble chips on top of my dog, but I haven't done that in years and it felt a little juvenile. The filling stayed in the bun and was consistant throughout the dog; the mustard wasnt' overwhelming and absorbed into the bread, the pickly relish mixed with the onions and everything stayed together in an unusual twist of hot dog fate; because so many hot dog buns fall apart midway through.

It was a reasonably satisfying meal. Better than a sandwich, not quite as good as a burger with well done fries, or a tuna melt with Cape Cod Chips. But it was tasty and something I don't eat very often. I guess hot dogs are one of those things that you can have in a pinch or have standard at a cookout.

Jobs

2008-04-30T19:22:00.000-04:00

I didn't get the part time baking job. I'm okay with it. I went for a walk today and it took me three passes to finally get the nerve to walk in. I knew I didn't get the job when they didn't call the week they said they would, but this would at least appease my mother so I can take the job I'd rather have, at least for now. Although a small part of me reminded myself how busy they were with their expansion, and possibly didn't get the chance, but even that was a weak excuse.

I have no hard feelings or bitterness though, I feel like I should, but I really don't. But the wife of the owner was nice, and even recognized me, and told me they'd gone with someone with more experience. Understandable. They'd keep me on file, which would be nice. Even if it's for volunteer work it'd be fun.
Anyway, how can I be mad at an Ice Cream store that I've been going to since I've been old enough to eat ice cream? Impossible. Now with their recent food menu in the past year or two makes it even more appealing.

That's about it over here for now. I'm sending out more letters and portfolios this week. I'm trying to send out four at a time, but come to think of it, I ought to do double that at least.
I'm just painfully shy and don't really want to bother anyone. I don't like to be an inconvenience or in the way of anyone. You only get one chance at a first impression, and I don't want mine to be "Great, another person to bother me."

But I know I need to get my name out there, so I'm trying. I just hope some of my work is good enough for these Alumni, who seem to have gone so far, and I know how much work it had to have taken for them to get where they are today. I just hope my work will be good enough one day and I can work as hard as they do.

Before I close this, I found a neat webpage when I was cruising the food news scene on Aol.com (sad, I know, every now and then you find something semi-worthwhile) Smoothie recipes, in a neat little format, too! How appealing. And I promise that is all I will say about said beverage for a few posts.

Fruit Smoothies

2008-04-28T15:14:00.004-04:00

Well, it finally happened. I've entered the first circle of hell of healthy eating. In the middle of my walk, I was thinking about how if I want to shape up and be a little healthier, I can't sabatoge my 3-4 mile walks with big meals and snacking. I wanted to eat fruit, but to get 5 servings, I'd be eating it all day, and honestly, it takes commitment and remembering to do so. I thought about the massive oranges in the fridge, and how intensely juicy it was, smoothies, and how easy it would be just to drink pureed fruit, and how healthy it would be.

When I returned home I carefully sliced the over-sized orange, being careful to remove all the white from it, chopped up big red strawberries and sliced a banana (a fruit I severely dislike, but I figured the flavor would be in the background with the other fruit) I was excited, because it turned out to be several cups of fruit.

It blended fairly quickly and nicely with a splash of orange juice, and was a nice hue of light maroon, it looked good, but was a little thick, like cottage cheese.
It tasted pretty good, fruity, and right in the middle of sweet and tart that I like in fruit.

How manageable! A world of options opened up to me. So many combinations and such potential health benefits. I could make a four cup fruit smoothie and drink it all day. What could be more easy than that?
I always think about eating healthy, and such an arduous battle it seems to be. How impossible it feels to get all you need in one day. Even multi-vitamins aren't good for you anymore (according to a newspaper in London)
So to try to feel better about how I eat during the day...well, all the time, I'm trying to do one good thing a day. When weather permits (today it's pouring, sadly) I walk most days of the week for either a minimum of 30 minutes or 2 miles. But usually I manage at least double of both. So drinking 4 out of the 5 servings of fruit I need in a day is probably better than the average person.

I've been keeping up with it, too. No eating A.D.D here. I've been doing it for a few days and it's kinda nice. Very easy. I'm trying to make it less thick by adding more orange juice, but so far I haven't been adding enough. Right now it's just fun to play around.

Cookie Catering

2008-04-20T17:31:00.004-04:00

I've been asked via my mother if I could do some baking catering for an upcoming event my mother's friend is doing in early May. Nothing fancy, just some cookies and such. But how many? The number, of course, is very important.
Am I obsessive compulsive or just instinctive on platter presentation? The number of items determines the type and shape of cookie. I have a compulsive need for evenness and balance in things like food and plating. One night when we had burgers, it bothered me a little that my mom's cheeseburger was on the bottom of the burger, while everyone else's was right side up.
I need balance, patterns and continuity for such things. For this particular event, I'm aiming for four items (but five would be good, too), so the pattern and choices are obvious; two round, two bar. Chocolate, nut, fruit based and miscellaneous: brownies, pecan sandies and lemon shortbread.

But I'm not sure about the pecan sandies. The method feels obnoxious and high maintenance. Browning and then chilling the butter into a hardish palpable mass, a food processor, constant chilling of the dough? I love to bake and try new recipes, but to have a cookie that is so needy leaves room for much error, so we'll see if I actually end up using it. I don't like needy cookies. Perhaps I'll swap it for another pecan based cookie.

The rest seem reasonable. My gripping fear for cutting bar cookies is only ever more heart pounding when it is for someone else, so maybe I'll just skip the bar all together and use round cutters to cut the cookies. I'm not sure how all round cookies will look on a plate....my compulsive sense is uneasy. But I'd rather have all round cookies that are perfect than badly cut (but well intentionally cut) bar cookies.

Broccoli

2008-04-15T22:03:00.004-04:00

I have a mild obsession with broccoli- as long as it's drenched in an Asian sauce. Something about that garlicky, sweet, soy sauce, or Hosin, or any combination of tangy savoriness is addictive.

We ordered Chinese Takeout from this place in Darien. It's a very nice restaurant, but I think it's too nice for takeout. I have a certain expectation of Chinese Takeout, and to order it from a place that sells expensive sushi seems a little...weird to me.

I wasn't very hungry and not in the mood for anything over $12. So I got Broccoli with ginger-soy sauce. The pleasing palette sweet and savory combination washed over my taste buds. The ginger was in the background, not an over powering flavor, enhancing the other ingredients in the sauce than over-whelming it. I could have sat there with the bitty container of rice poured over the take-out plastic bowl of broccoli and eaten it all night. Or just eaten the broccoli with my fingers.
I can't describe the flavor of broccoli other than I hated its very "stench" at a young age, the smell of over-steamed and over cooked broccoli is enough to send waves of nausea to even the most dedicated broccoli eater (and who wants to eat water logged boiled broccoli?). Now I know better. I currently love it in exclusively Asian dishes, and under very precise conditions; not too over cooked, not too undercooked, and just the right amount of sauce and I'll eat it by the peck.

I think kids would eat vegetables if they were cooked right. I know I would have as a child. It's easy to sneak veggies into kid food, and to make it good. Had I known vegetables were so good in stir-fries, mac and cheese and pressed in sandwiches, I would have been eating them a long time ago, not discovering them in my teens and 20's. But that's the way things are sometimes. I was a close minded, stubborn picky eater, I think I had this coming to me.

But what do we know when we're young anyway? We think the tooth fairy exists and our lives revolve around candy, and how to obtain more of it. We can't be bothered with things such as nutrition when we're set on finding hidden candy and watching cartoons.

Hopefully now we all know better and kids today will grow up knowing better. Fruits and vegetables aren't this thing that we were all suspicious about growing up, but this delicious array of color that just happens to be good for us. It's all about preparation, and as the old Culinary Institute of America slogan went, "Preparation is everything."

Deal Breakers

2008-04-15T15:26:00.000-04:00

I'm printing out pages of cover letters, articles and resumes and putting them together like little press releases of my potential career. Everything looks professional and organized. However, as I try to write the names and addresses on the large manila envelopes I start to worry; is my handwriting going to be a deal breaker?
The school has burned professionalism and the need to have perfection on every inch of anything you send to anyone- especially alumni- into my brain and very psyche. I can understand the need for it, however, does handwritten address fall under this spectrum? My handwriting looks childish and even my best efforts can't help that. My poor fine tune motor skills makes everything difficult to have high proficiency in. Will my handwriting be a deal breaker? Will they simply see how it looks and toss it aside?

I hope not. I hope they look past my hand writing and at my written words. I'm a lot smarter than I look or my handwriting might show.

Maybe I just worry too much and am too hard on such things. Are these things really as big a deal as the school makes it? Probably not, but that extra inch of insane professionalism is what might get you hired. That little edge might be just enough, so I obsess.

I like to think the alumni whom I'm writing to still have the CIA professionalism, but are relatively easy going and understanding. All the Alum I've met have been incredibly nice and professional, and have that same mutual, joking eye-rolling of "Yep, they did that when I was there, too." It's nice. It makes me feel like I belong to this big club.

So I hope my hand writing won't be my deal breaker. I hope they look past the outside, and see what is inside.

This healthy eating thing

2008-04-13T19:18:00.003-04:00

So, I've been thinking more and more about this healthy eating thing. Considering my bad genetics of various debilitating diseases like cancer and dementia (factor in this lovely thing called NF, which causes a multitude of things), I really ought to be taking it more seriously (when thinking in length about such things, it's almost enough for me to transfer over to vegan territory. Almost). This weekend I was cooking breakfast with my boyfriend: egg sandwich on a cheddar cheese bagel, and I remembered the fruits in the fridge, namely, massive oranges.

I'm very particular about my fruit. The inner child pickiness stubbornly refuses to let go of some psychological blocks of un-palate pleasing things in my mouth. My fruit can't be too tart, too cold, too soft, too hard or too off colored, depending on what I am eating. Too tart or sweet and my teeth burn with pain, too hard and crunchy and my mouth aches, too mushy and I want to gag. But as my boyfriend put the large orange segments into a bowl, I wondered what it would taste like. But then I thought: "What's a little tooth pain or discomfort now? Eat the fruit! Now!" I scolded myself; Eat it! Eat it now! Segment after segment went into my mouth as I hoped this would pay off later. The orange wasn't too bad. My ideal orange is one of juiciness and full bodied orange flavor. This one fell a little flat on orangeyness.

But it's a start. This healthy eating thing will take work and dedication, but I'm 22, and if I want to live for a long time with minimal health risks, I have to suck it up and eat all this stuff. What's a little gag reflex of a too soft grape if it'll keep me going?

Egg Whites and dieting

2008-04-09T08:45:00.004-04:00

Who in their right mind eats only cooked egg whites? Are the nutritionists aware of the nutrient content of it? Egg whites are mostly water and have far less value than the entire egg. One egg has roughly 70 calories, So what's the harm in having one whole egg with a slice of toast?

Cooked egg whites look like gunk on a plate, and probably taste the same. You need the yolk, not only for nutrition and a little flavor, but for color too. We eat with our eyes as much as our mouths and are more likely to be willing to eat foods with color appeal and presenation than anything else: think about a typical school lunch circa decades ago- a ice cream scoop of mashed potatoes, a ladel of something you hope is beef stew-some cuts of meat, mushy veggies stuck in there and over cooked, dull looking frozen peas.

Yum. Now think of the same meal, but piped mashed pototoes in the center of a braised beef stew, with vibrant, tender vegetables, colorfully placed within the rich, brown sauce. Doesn't that sound better? It's all about how the food looks. Egg whites look terrible. Why are nutritionists telling people to just eat egg whites? I'm don't think it's right to tell people that. When you make people eat things like this on a diet, they are most likely to fail.
Why not tell these people: eat one egg, one slice of toast and 100% juice. That sounds much healthier and appealing to me. When people are given a little slack on a diet, they are most likely to succeed. A diet isn't a temporary thing, it is a life style change and to be able to stick with it, you need options, delicious food and a little slack now and then- and not 100 calorie snack packs.

All these limitations just remind people that they are on a diet. It's not healthy. Sooner or later, they'll fail, so whats 70 calories in an egg? Nothing! If you're worried about 70 calories over something as nutritionally sound as a whole egg, theres' something wrong with what we're being told about diets.

Crutons

2008-04-08T20:41:00.004-04:00

Leftover bread makes for great crutons. My mother asked me to prep the sausage, egg, bread and cheese dish (that I mentioned below) for a meeting in the morning. I ended up not needing the rest of the cubed white bread. Not wanting to be wasteful, I planned on saving it for breadcrumbs, but we had a lot of those. Then I remembered my sister saying she was going to have the leftover salad from dinner for her lunch tomorrow. So with that in mind, I thought crutons would be a delicious use of leftover bread.

I heated up a little olive oil in a nonstick pan, and got my spices together while I waited: salt, pepper, granulated garlic. Once the oil became shimmery, I sprinkled the pillowy cubes of bread in and let them toast, adding in a pat of butter as an afterthought.

As they slowly toasted, I sprinkled my choice of spice over the sponges of cubes. I tossed and turned them, careful not to burn and not to make the bread fall apart, adding a little more oil here, a little more salt there, until the soft pillows turned into soft, crunchy crutons.

This type of cruton is special. It has a light crunch on the outside, like very gently toasted bread, and a yielding texture on the inside. It's perfect. I'm not very fond of the hard crutons, they are obnoxious- loud and crunchy and are difficult to spear with a fork, making you chase them around like an unruly house pet.
These pan fried crutons, however, are soft, delicate, and delicious. Easily captured by the fork, and doen't get in the way with the gentle bite of the salad.

The aroma of these particular crutons are tempting. There's just enough garlic to be flavorful but not over whelming enough to linger on the palette, just enough oil and butter to get the perfect light crunch without being soggy, and just enough salt and pepper to tie it all together.

I think too many people under appreciate the sheer versitility and lush appeal that is the Maillard Reaction.

Egg Sandwiches, Post 50

2008-04-08T09:19:00.005-04:00

Is there any better savory breakfast than a perfectly cooked egg, melted cheese and some breakfast pork product between two pieces of your choice of bread? If there is, I'm not sure I've discovered it.

I didn't really "discover" eggs until my second year at the Culinary Institute of America, because I had PM classes for the majority of my first year, and when I did have AM classes in the beginning, I was still an embarrassingly large picky eater. I don't remember my first egg dish, I just remember wanting to try something new, and either the special scramble or special omelette sounded good that day, and much to my amazement I enjoyed it. Where has this delightful meal been my entire life? The most eggs I'd ever eaten was a twice a year concoction of eggs, cubed white bread, cheese and sausage, mixed together and baked in an enormous dish.

Egg sandwiches though, is what really did it for me. I loved the egg, just slightly gooed in the center, the melted cheese, the crisp saltiness of the bacon (or the sausage) with the bagel. It was delicious. It's not surprising that simple things such as these are the most succulent.
So, two years and several dozen egg sandwiches later, I decided to make one for breakfast today. I had found one of my metal round cutters and thought it would be perfectly easy to just crack the egg directly into the metal cutter on the frying pan....

I was a bit wrong, or impatient. The pan didn't heat up as much as I know I should have. I had used pan spray and worried that it would burn before the egg cooked. After that, I became impatient. The egg simply would not cook fast enough for me. The egg whites were starting to seep slightly under the cutter... while the egg whites slowly were starting to cook. This wasn't going at all like I'd planned! In my haste, I gave up and lifted the cutter from the pan, and the whites spread out slightly onto the pan. Finally, I abandoned the idea of a fried egg and pushed the egg around, combining it as best I could, put a dallop of cheese sauce from Sunday night's dinner and called it done. I'm embarrassed to say I'm terrible at frying eggs.

It wasn't the most satisfying sandwich I'd ever had, but it was something. It needed bacon, a bit more cheese, granulated garlic and a hard roll.

The Appeal of.....

2008-03-29T13:24:00.003-04:00

What is so appealing about the combination of rye bread with onions, American cheese and a hamburger(or turkey) pan fried? I had a fake Ruben today (rye, Russian dressing, American cheese and turkey), and the onions and rye had such a mouthwatering allure. The slight crunch of the toasted bread melding with the melted cheese and pairing perfectly with the onions has such an indescribable perfection to them.

I'm addicted to patty melts. I didn't discover rye bread until I had my first, and I've been addicted ever since. Beef, cheese, and grilled onions have this classic savory flavor: the juicy meatiness of the beef, just a little bit pink in the center, the mild cheese gooed over the edges, the grilled onions, soft and slightly carmalized, adding a little more aromatic lusciousness to it. Whoever was the gastronomical genius to replace a bun with rye and throw it in a buttered fry pan is my lunch hero. I find myself looking for an excuse to throw anything in between rye bread with cheese in a frying pan. I can't describe rye bread properly, but I think it's the caraway that makes it great. It's smell is both distinct and vague. Something you can't pinpoint, but is so overwhelmingly familiar.
The rye is the background component. It is also mild, depending on what type of bread you like. I prefer the light rye, because it pairs so beautifully with the caraway and doesn't distract from the beef, onions and cheese. I haven't experienced an authentic dark rye bread, but I imagine it to be overwhelmingly delicious, intense and full bodied. But perhaps not the best bread for patty melts.

But I don't know the deep down, delicious appeal of such compentons. Apart they are good, together they are indulgent, even a little sinful. Whatever it is, it brings me sheer flavor pleasure that few dinereqsue foods seem to bring.